Alone at times...  

ButteryDelight 59F
1961 posts
7/6/2006 2:03 pm

Last Read:
7/15/2006 11:17 pm

Alone at times...


Sometimes, I just need to be alone, quiet and still. When I begin to feel the need to be alone, I head for my spot, my Quiet Place, where I can retreat from the things weighing me down. My Quiet Place is special to me and I don’t like to be disturbed when I am in there and even went so far as to hang a Do Not Disturb sign up. There in my Quiet Place I can think things through, take time to look at the situation from different angles and try to come up with a solution. But, there have been a few times when I couldn't’t solve what ever was weighing me down. Yet, I still felt better for having gone to my place and thought things through.

When, I was a little girl growing up on the farm, my favorite spot to retreat to was the tree house. I would climb up and pull the ladder up after me. I’d sit there and listen to the birds singing and if it happened to be nighttime I’d listen to the sounds of the crickets and the cicadas. Day or night it didn’t really matter as I could stay up in that tree house for hours and hours. I had some books up there on a shelf and some dolls and was content either reading or just closing my eyes and thinking. I did some of my best thinking up in that tree house. I’d think about why this happened or why so and so was mean to me at school that day. Often, I’d think about my parents and their arguments. I’d wonder if I had some how caused the fights. Sometimes I’d cry up there in that tree house where no one could see or hear me and sometimes I wouldn’t. A few times, I’d write, although that was not my usual place for writing. At other times I’d color or paint or even sing to myself.

As the years passed and I grew up, the things I kept in the tree house changed. The dolls were put away and more books and paper took their place. Even though the items kept in the tree house changed, my reasons for going there did not change. I went there to find peace, quiet and maybe a few answers to life’s mysteries.

You are probably wondering how often I went to the tree house. Well, it just depended upon what was happening at that time in my life. I remember one bad week. The week we were forced to sell our farm and move to town. I spent a lot of time in that tree house that week. Every day after school and all of the weekend was spent in the tree house. I hated the fact that we were moving. I cried a lot that week as only a ten-year-old girl who just knew the world was coming to end can do.

I knew I was going to have to find a new Quiet Place. When we moved into town we bought a three-story house with an attic and a basement. I discovered a little crawl place in the attic just big enough for me. That crawl space became my new Quiet Place. But, as life changed for me, so did my Quiet Place change too. When my parents divorced and we moved to Texas we lived in town. It took me a month to find a new Quiet Place. The spot I chose was not even in the house or on our property. It was about a mile down the road at an old limestone rock quarry that the builders of the housing addition abandoned when the houses were finished being built. Lots of the neighborhood children would ride their bikes and motorcycles there at that rock quarry. Which is how I discovered it one Saturday morning while riding my bike with friends. At the quarry there were what we called “caves” but were really hollowed out hills left over from the cranes that dug and scooped out the limestone to pour into dump trucks. I discovered one that was hidden from view by a big tree. That “cave” became my new Quiet Place. When I went away to college, I again had to search for a new place. While I was in college the near by lake had a tree that I could climb into and so during my four years their, that tree became my Quiet Place. I am fond of that tree because I spent three weeks sitting in that tree, not eating or drinking instead of going to classes like I should have been. That was during a bad period of my life. I was going through a depressive time. I eventually had a “mental breakdown”. Though that is not what it would be called today. Today they would say I had a “psychological episode” or a “psychological breach” where I tried to end my life and almost succeeded. I will go into the details of that time at a latter point, as that is not the main idea of this article. Anyway, when I got married, I found various places to have my Quiet Place. The park across the street was one and then when we moved into this house this room became my present Quiet Place.

I love this room. It was my son’s nursery when he was a baby so it is quite small. There is this desk and chair, the computer, a phone, and a twin bed, which took the place of the baby crib. I love this room. It has a bay window that I can open to feel a breeze or to listen to the birds singing. I can also see my dogs from the window. When I manage to sleep, I sleep in this room on the twin bed. There is a small two-drawer dresser beside the bed with my alarm clock on it. As you can tell, I have all that I need. My family knows when I am in here with the door closed it is because I want to be left alone. For the most part they follow my wishes and leave me alone. If they don’t and I really need to do some serious thinking, I go to that park across the street that I mentioned earlier.

Do you find that there are times when you have to be alone? Do you have a Quiet Place of your own? Perhaps a special room in your own house? Perhaps you retreat to a near by park or some other place? If you do I would like you to tell me about it. I think it would be interesting to know.


ButteryDelight 59F

7/7/2006 11:06 am

    Quoting rm_mzhunyhole:
    I have a treehouse in my backyard..I had it built for my grandkids..and some nights I have just climbed up there and sat in it..thats a real cool thing..I love it.
Yes, Mizhuny, tree houses are cool. I sure miss mine.
Thank you for reading and commenting.

Buttery Delight


somethingelse40 76M
14676 posts
7/7/2006 3:41 pm

Just passing by and overheard your thoughts, sitting alone, pondering and perusing and pondering your feelings.


wickedeasy 68F  
31320 posts
7/8/2006 10:51 am

i have this small room, a libeary is too garnd a name for it but it is where i keep my books and where i meditate. pictures of my family and a painting that no one else likes but me.

smiles - secret it isn't but it is my special place.

You cannot conceive the many without the one.


ButteryDelight 59F

7/8/2006 11:54 am

sounds like a place I need to visit some day. Thank you for reading and commenting.

Buttery Delight


ButteryDelight 59F

7/8/2006 11:57 am

    Quoting somethingelse40:
    Just passing by and overheard your thoughts, sitting alone, pondering and perusing and pondering your feelings.
thank you for passing through, something else, and for reading and commenting.

Buttery Delight


ButteryDelight 59F

7/8/2006 12:02 pm

    Quoting wickedeasy:
    i have this small room, a libeary is too garnd a name for it but it is where i keep my books and where i meditate. pictures of my family and a painting that no one else likes but me.

    smiles - secret it isn't but it is my special place.
That's cool WE. None of my places were secret either but they were and are a place I can retreat to and think.

I hope you have not been sitting at the computer too long.


fancy_for_you 41F
3014 posts
7/9/2006 1:34 am

Since I live alone right now any room in my house is a quiet place for me if I need it to be. Plus this was Granny's house and I always felt safe and at peace here. However I find when I need peace and some thinking time I do best if I have the money to put gas in the car and just drive with no where in particular in mind.

I did that one night when very upset and ended up 2 states away with no money to get home...my family had to wire me the money for gas. They were very mad when they found out that I had just been out driving and thinking. Was a waste of money they said.

Fuzzy

~~Fuzzy~~


ButteryDelight 59F

7/9/2006 6:42 pm

    Quoting fancy_for_you:
    Since I live alone right now any room in my house is a quiet place for me if I need it to be. Plus this was Granny's house and I always felt safe and at peace here. However I find when I need peace and some thinking time I do best if I have the money to put gas in the car and just drive with no where in particular in mind.

    I did that one night when very upset and ended up 2 states away with no money to get home...my family had to wire me the money for gas. They were very mad when they found out that I had just been out driving and thinking. Was a waste of money they said.

    Fuzzy
awwww, fuzzy. I don't think it was a waste of time nor money. All of us need our alone time,our thinking things through time. You could try to remember to put a little extra cash in your glove compartment in case that happens again. I have some in mine cause it locks with a key.

Buttery Delight


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