Me Love You Long Time...If You Number 1000  

AtomicArtist0 46M
5236 posts
2/20/2006 5:27 pm

Last Read:
7/30/2006 4:10 pm

Me Love You Long Time...If You Number 1000

You see that beautiful hunka, hunka burning love there to your left? Her name is Yuki Ono and she is The Asian Karaoke Sensation . She’s won so many prizes for karaoke that practically everything that comes out of her mouth turns to solid gold. There are guys who would drag their balls over a mile of broken glass just to hear her fart over a walkie-talkie. They do weird shit like that in Japan! I think she also married one of the straight dudes from Duran Duran and caused that band to break up or something.

Anyway, let me tell you why she is going to become so important to you that you’ll practically piss yourself thinking about her. She will sing for you any song you request…any song you want…if, and only if you are my 1000th commenter.

Everyone knows Daddy loves you so much that he gives away monumental prizes for his monumental commenters. You may recall All This can Be YoursIf You're My 500th Commenter and its subsequent winner Tipadee Doo Dah Tipadee Ay. According to my shitty mathematical skills, we can have a winner within this post!

Here’s what you’ll get:

1. Some dumbass blog title with your name in it! Wow! Cool!

2. Your picture posted on my blog! Imagine folks masturbating and gazing longingly upon your face/eyes/tits/legs/cock/ass/pussy/balls/teeth/shadowy silhouette, or Darth Vader fetish costume from the comfort and convenience of my blog! Booyeah!!

3. Deep Dicking…I mean, gentle ribbing! That’s right, Yuki and I will engage in a friendly dialog all about you, you, you, beautiful, wonderful YOU. It’ll be so warm and fuzzy! Shucks, and you all know how gentle my ribbing is…during this month’s horoscopes, my ribbing was so gentle that they denied my post after only 79 comments. Its true…scroll back and check…its not there. I’ll fix that later, on to the next prize. I’m so excited I could just shit!

4. A link to your blog! That’s right. This could be the most valuable of all prizes to you. I will provide a link to your blog whether I think you’re a creative genius or not! Everyone will go to your blog to congratulate you and maybe even read your stuff. If you’re a Little Dog…this could be the break you needed to skyrocket to super-stardom. And if you’re already a Big Dog, you’ll get the satisfaction of knowing that yet one more person has provided a link to your blog and this time it won’t be a fake profile created by you. And if you don’t have a blog, I’ll make some shit up. Hot Diggity Balls! I hope he links to my blog!!

5. And finally, your song request sung by Asian Karaoke Sensation, Yuki Ono! I thought the other four prizes would be enough but Yuki wanted more, more, more!…(and she always does.) She’s such a mega-sensation in Asia, she practically invented karaoke. So, how can this possibly go wrong? the neighbor’s dog is telling me to kill again!

The Rules:

1. Write anything you want when you comment, but include your song title and artist. Otherwise…how she gonna know what you want her to sing? Shit!

2. In order to provide a variety of choices, you may offer several different songs for Yuki to choose from, but to keep this random and fair, you are limited to no more than two comments each. You may space them out strategically or blow your whole wad at once…your choice. If you provide multiple song requests, Yuki will choose the one she likes best.

3. Your song must have words and be in English. She’s not going to sing Beethoven’s Fifth or that Gary Glitter song they play at all sporting events.

4. So that I don’t rig this competition like George Dubya did twice, you will not hear from me or Yuki on my blog until our 1000th commenter is known or, if this thing bombs badly, I’ll come in to let you know you can have a third comment…but it shouldn’t come to that. We’re pretty close here.

Ok, that should cover everything. Good luck, all y’all bitches!

craptoast 40M

2/20/2006 5:51 pm

aw man, and here i just got to 500 and thought i was all cool. dammit. how about 'blow me' by red peters? i'll come back with something better later. like around 1000.

saddletrampsk 55F

2/20/2006 6:07 pm

Ummm..Im so excited at the chance to be your song request would be "Wake me Up Before you Go-G0" by George Michael..its such a sexy song..

caressmewell 54F

2/20/2006 6:37 pm

Oh Kay....Happy almost 1000th!!

Song...Heart of Glass by Blondie

spinmedown 50M
3626 posts
2/20/2006 8:36 pm

"Make Mayan A Hawaiian" by Southern Culture on the Skids

Most people are other people... FUCKING CHARACTER LIMIT!!! ~Oscar Wilde

havenbliss 44F

2/20/2006 8:41 pm

OOh I want a song sung...

Chick Habit by April March!
It is on my blog so you can get the words from there if I win. Hell I will sing to you AtomicArtist in person even if I don't win!


2/20/2006 9:15 pm

Yuki Ono? Wasn't she John Lennon's wife?

My good luck Karaoke song is the theme song for that old talking horse show Mr. Ed.


PrincessKarma 44F
6188 posts
2/20/2006 9:40 pm


Hope you find out who #1000 is soon. I hate suspense...

The Big Bang was the mother of all orgasms.PrincessKarma


2/20/2006 9:58 pm


ticktock500 45M

2/20/2006 10:26 pm

freebird, man

PrincessKarma 44F
6188 posts
2/20/2006 11:11 pm

Oh, almost forgot my song.... "Beyond the Sea"

The Big Bang was the mother of all orgasms.PrincessKarma

8337 posts
2/21/2006 2:47 am

"Disorder" by Joy Division.

Work this, baby Yoko.


"My every move is a calculated step, to bring me closer to embrace an early death." -Tupac Shakur

skyking412004 54M
5363 posts
2/21/2006 3:23 am

_____Is this how you comnment whore? Hold on. I'm taking notes in case I need to know how to do this someday. (elevator music plays) Now I'm ready. I was trying to find a song where a chick sings about how good my dick feels in her mouth but couldn't. Maybe you can help me out here Atomic, since you've had women sing that to you. (On their knees, in the mall)...Elton Johns; Sorry Seems to be the Hardest Word.

Yours_2_Corrupt 40F

2/21/2006 3:51 am

Wild Horses - Sundays

_CoffeeNoCream_ 54F

2/21/2006 6:08 am

"I dont like Mondays"

1023 posts
2/21/2006 10:16 am

Grunge couple by that dog

Romeo by the Wipers

spinmedown 50M
3626 posts
2/21/2006 1:35 pm

"Lay Lady Lay"
by Bob Dylan

Most people are other people... FUCKING CHARACTER LIMIT!!! ~Oscar Wilde

LaVadaLicious 55F  
2770 posts
2/21/2006 2:22 pm

I ain't no mathmetician, but I know how many you need and this is not near enough LMAO.. How about I just bend over and grab my ankles instead? Free Your Mind -- En vogue

Stop in and Sign The Guest Book


havenbliss 44F

2/21/2006 5:37 pm

Angry Johnny! Poe

MissAnnThrope 57F
11488 posts
2/21/2006 7:44 pm

I want her to sing, "Can Your Pussy Do The Dog" by The Cramps.

rm_mm0206 70F
7767 posts
2/21/2006 9:03 pm

How about Imagine by the genius of John Lennon


Feels Like The First time by Foreigner


southrnpeach333 51F

2/21/2006 9:08 pm

Georgia On My Mind

AtomicArtist0 46M
6015 posts
2/21/2006 11:48 pm

Thank you all for participating and your comments. We have a winner amongst you. I can assure you that dozens of scenarios played out in my mind as I imagined each of you winning. You have chosen some very cool songs. Yuki would have been thrilled to put her own spin on your songs and I would have been thrilled to give some of you...that "gentle ribbing" I talked so much about.

I love all of you, but the rules of the game says I have to love one of you more. Give me a day or two to wrap my mind around the winner and come up with some good dialog. I'll come back and bring the lube, as someone is going to get some loving...Atomic style.

MrNuttz05 50M

2/22/2006 2:44 pm

There was a 'STRAIGHT GUY' in Duran Duran?????? Yeah, right!

'Father Figure'
by, George Michael...

saddletrampsk 55F

2/23/2006 5:29 pm dont keep me in suspense..who won?

ediesedgewick 59F

2/23/2006 7:09 pm

Wild Cherry:
Play That Funky Music White that funky music right
Play that funky music white boy..Lay down that boogie and play that funky music till you...CRAP! I'm to late!

Oh well...whatever you and Yuki do will kiss ass...Yeah, they were dancin' and singin' and movin' to the groovin', and just when it hit me somebody turned around and shouted...

ediesedgewick 59F

2/24/2006 3:54 am

Er--I meant kick ass--that Wild Cherry gets me goin and I can't type! Funny I typed that though--you being the last one here to kiss ass, well, know what I mean

skyking412004 54M
5363 posts
2/24/2006 5:16 pm

_____Shit. I still could have used my other comment.

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