Day 83: Razzlefrackin' AFF on the blink..  

AGNJoe1 48M
385 posts
1/31/2006 5:44 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Day 83: Razzlefrackin' AFF on the blink..

AGN Joe winks: 0
AGN Joe new looks: 0
AGN Joe e-mails: 0
Added friends into my network: 0


Sorry folks. I would have posted last night, but AdultFriendFinder went on the blink and the site crapped out for me last night to where I was unable to even get the site up so I could even see it.

Not much to report. No looks, no winks, no e-mails...but I did have enough time to trim off all of the dingleberries off of my ass hair! Well it's all quiet on the sexual front. I wish I could give you guys a juicy account and a play by play of me and someone else here, but it's been so quiet, I can even hear a fly fart. Not only that, but no one responded to my last post, so I guess I shouldn't expect any of you women to take a trip to Chicago soon, huh?

So, since it's quiet, I decided to work on my cheesy pick up lines...

If you & I were squirrels, could I bust a nut in your hole?

I'd like to wrap your legs around my head & wear you like a feed bag.

If it's true that we are what we eat, I could be you by morning.

How do you like your eggs: poached, scrambled, or fertilized?

I was about to go masturbate & I needed a name to go with your face.

You are so fine that I'd eat your shit just to see where it came from.

My love for you is like diarrhea - I just cant hold it in.

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I like spaghetti,
Let's go fuck.

Is that a keg in your pants? Cause I would love to tap that ass.

If your right leg was Thanksgiving & your left leg was Christmas, could I meet you between the holidays?

You remind me of a championship bass - I dont know whether to mount you or eat you.

Your parents must be retarded cause you are soooooooooooo special.

Could I touch your belly button from the inside?

I'm not too good at algebra but doesn't U + I = 69?

Guy: Would you like to dance?
Girl: I dont care for this song, and surely wouldn't dance with you.
Guy: I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me. I said you look fat in those pants.

I'm new in town could I have directions to your house?

Fuck me if I'm wrong, but is your name Maura?

I love every bone in your body - especially mine.

You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this motel room.

Wanna play Pearl Harbor? It's a game where I lay back while you blow the hell out of me.

Your body's name must be Visa cause it's everywhere I want to be.

Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?

I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you I'd be coming too.

I'd like to screw your brains out, but it appears that someone beat me to it.

Oh, I'm sorry I thought that was a braille name tag.

You are the sty in my eye.


Well what do you think? I'm sure to get the ladies with these lines. Yeah, right....

Eh, well if anything I hope it made you laugh. Maybe some of you could put some of your own that are cheesy? I'd love to hear 'em.

Well, as always thanks for reading, and god bless.
I'll catch ya tomorrow.


pinkplaytoyz 51F

2/1/2006 2:49 pm

LMAO!!!Though I do think a couple of those might cause one or two women to go "Huh?"

AGNJoe1 48M

2/1/2006 7:16 pm

Heh...yeah when I used to be a DJ in a night club, man, did I hear some cheesy pick up lines from the guys. So I started collecting them and writting them down. It was fun to do, and I just happened to run across them as I was cleaning out an old junk desk drawer. Man, did I get a laugh or two from those...

WildChild5884 33F

2/3/2006 8:06 pm

Love em..I've heard a few of these before (couple in person sadly) but definitely agree with pink on the fact that a few could mean a wtf look..or possibly a knee meets nuts scenario..ouch Anyway a couple I know of

Guy: Did it hurt?
Girl: Did what hurt?
Guy: When you fell from heaven?

Guy: I seem to have lost my phone number can I have yours?

The classic what is a girl like you doing in a place like this?

Guy: From the moment I saw you my mind just went blank.
Girl: And that's different from your exactly?

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