Day 224: My 150th post turns out to be a bummer...  

AGNJoe1 48M
385 posts
6/22/2006 8:35 pm

Last Read:
7/10/2006 8:29 pm

Day 224: My 150th post turns out to be a bummer...


Well, I thought my 150th post would be a good one, but it seems Murphy's law has struck again.

I finally got word from the person I was awaiting to hear from, and unfortunately I caught her in a bad mood. She pretty much told me straight out that I was not the person she was referring to, I was not her type, that she thinks I'm juvenile, and that my last post in which she thought that I was generally upset with people not being honest with me was directed towards her. Also, she's not attracted to me because of my bad relationship with my wife because it's not an open relationship. Zero for five, folks.

Needless to say, she let me have it, and I didn't mean to piss her off. So not to make any waves here, I apologized to her, and I told her that since I NOW know her intentions that she is not interested in me, I told her that I will no longer be reading her blog, I posted my apology on her blog as well, and then told her that I will now leave her alone and not bother her again.

Now, I'm not mad at her in any way, but I am somewhat disappointed, mostly in myself for my negative attitude here as of late. They say you catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar, and as of late I've been jaded and filled with a lot of vinegar. Mainly because I'm not getting anything, and my anger has been spilling over to here, where I vent it out. The only problem is, by venting it out, it makes me look bad and unattractive. I could see why no one would want to even be with me with this attitude.

I also don't know what I should have expected with her either, as she didn't even bother to look at my profile. But it wouldn't have mattered anyway, because my first impression here was enough for her to pass judgement on me. And in some sense...it was rightfully so.

So I do take a lot of the blame in this. But I have learned some things about myself, in which I'm going to take account.

So....what now I guess?

I don't know. For a moment, I almost considered just closing up the account and saying the hell with everything, and just up and leave. But that wouldn't be right, because that would not be fair to the people who read this blog, and the few friends I have here. So for now, I honestly do not know where to go from here. But I do know I think I am going to take a few days off and think for a while on my attitude and my actions here. I'll be back, but it's going to be a while.

As always, thanks for reading, and gob bless you all. Good night.

AGN Joe

rm_KarmoHunny 56F
888 posts
7/3/2006 11:14 pm

Sounds like you need to cool your jets a little. It seems that meeting people on this service can be frustrating. But being married and not in an open relationship makes it a bit harder. Just hang in there though. When you least expect it, something will happen.

Peace


AGNJoe1 48M

7/10/2006 8:29 pm

Thanks Karmo. I've tried to cool my jets here for a while. The only problem is I think it may take a bit longer than expected is all.

AGN Joe


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