DAY 180!!! A half year of blogging...who would have thunk it?  

AGNJoe1 48M
385 posts
5/9/2006 9:00 pm

Last Read:
5/12/2006 5:59 pm

DAY 180!!! A half year of blogging...who would have thunk it?

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My thanks to artgirl1975 for stopping by and checking me out.

Well folks...180 days. Nearly a half year of blogging. If you want to get technical I'd probably say Day 182 at 12 noon would be the half year point, but I'm not too much for being technical. Well sometimes, but you know, I pretty much am not going to hash it over 2 days.

So where are we after Day 180? Ahem...
Pretty much - nowhere. When you break it down, I have not gotten laid except from my wife, who broke down for one night and gave me 15 minutes of her time. And while I do appreciate her effort, after telling the counselor it was a mercy fcuk, I'm not sure what to make of it. I still love her, I'm still trying to work it out with her, and I am seeing slow progress...but that's just it...slooooooooooooow progress.

So where does that leave me? I honestly do not know. You see there is a stigma here where I know for a fact there are a LOT of married people here, but it's like the military rule for homosexuals..."don't ask, don't tell." And you see, I'm a fairly honest guy. I'm not going to lie to some woman and lead them on, because that's just wrong. And I get a lot of guys complaining that a TON of women are jaded because of guys who say they aren't married, try to carry on two relationships or lie about their marriage, and then they get caught by the woman, which pisses the woman off.
Then these women get mad at guys, and they either get jaded and beat up on the next guy for doing nothing but being a man, or they turn bi or lesbian for a while, or the just get tight and it makes it harder for a man to relax and have fun with a woman.

Now look ladies, we're not going to get into a deal where guys deserve it or not, or why you hate men. This is not a post where I want you to start posting or to give a disrotation on "Why I Hate Men." The bottom line is this...I'm trying to do the right thing by not lying, and I'm trying to be up front with the ladies here and say, I need to have some fun, I need a release, I need some No-Strings attached sex from a lady or ladies, if possible, just for one night. I just want to feel like a man once more. That's it. If you want to be friends, it's cool, however, it will NOT progress into a relationship. I just want it to be to where both of us have fun and that's it.
Now, in the past six months, I got a lot of people telling me, no thank you, I got a couple of guys who shot me hate mail, I got some guys who shot me e-mails saying I should just let them blow me and I should go gay, which no offence, I'm not gay or headed that way. That's just not me. I got one woman that led me on for at least a month promising hook-ups and NEVER came through with one of them. And a lot of nothing else.
On the plus side, I have met some fairly nice people, some very nice and wonderful ladies who said that if they WERE in my area, they would hook up with me. However, they weren't in the area, sad for me. And I met some really nice people who I have developed some really cool friendships with online.
I remember chazity20...

She was and will still be the first person that reached out to me and said hello and kept me going.
I remember sideline1968...
She has been one of my biggest supporters here, and source of positive energy and some awesome cyber sex. Which reminds me I need to get some more of that again soon.
And I remember LustGoddess2469...

Who at first told me she wasn't interested in me, but in the end, I still won her over as one of my best friends.
And...I remember travelingintexas?????
Who'd have thunk that I'd find a guy friend on here when I was looking for a girl to hook up with? And an awesome dude at that???

But finally, I've met some really awesome women on here as well, and please forgive me, but I could be typing for hours and not even get a chance to name even a small portion of the women who have stopped by to check out my profile, winked at me, e-mailed me to say hello, and checked out my blog! Ladies please....PLEASE forgive me. I'd end up covering a 30 page document just mentioning everyone who stopped by and said hello.

Irregardless, there have been a ton of wonderful, awesome people here, and I just wish I could meet some of you wonderful people. If any of you ever plan to come to Chicago to visit, by all means, let me know in advance and if I can, I would love to show you Chicago and say hello.

Anyway, where does this lead me in the future?

I wish I could tell you, as I honestly do not have a clue. I've kind of lost hope a bit folks. I can't tell you if I'll EVER get a chance to be with another woman, and tell you all of the amazingly juicy details. It's the least I can do for dragging you along this roller-coaster of a ride and not promising a big payoff of me finally becoming a man once more. I can't even tell you if I'll be able to keep blogging here. I told myself that if a year of blogging didn't pay off, I'd just quit. Well now...I don't even know if I might keep that promise. I remember pinkplaytoyz having to leave, and how bummed I was when she left. Since then, there's part of me that's torn. If I left, I know I'd be really hurting some people here if I just up and left. But there's part of me that says, just HOW long can I give myself before I just become so jaded myself that I start hating women? I don't want to be that guy! That's just not me.

So what to do? I have no clue people. But I still have six months left before that happens. Who know what will happen in those six months? I don't. The only thing I can know is that I just need to continue working on being positive, staying the same goofy guy I've always been, have fun with this and try to enjoy life as best as I can. That's all I can do folks. It's what I've tried to do from the start, and I'm not going to change, or let myself get to down in the dumps or depressed about it.

I got six months. The ride is half over, so let's just see what this roller-coaster can really do. Anyone ready to jump on and help me finish this ride?

AGN Joe, six months and counting...

LustGoddess2469 51F  
2453 posts
5/10/2006 6:25 am

If I ever get back to Chicago, you are in SO much trouble. lol You'll have a permanent smile plastered on your face for months to come.


AGNJoe1 48M

5/12/2006 5:59 pm

That is IF you ever get to Chicago. IF.

Until then, I'll be waiting patiently.


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