How to make a woman happy.  

634694u2 48M
30 posts
2/1/2006 2:27 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

How to make a woman happy.


Being a man, I suppose I have a little insight as to how and why many men are pigs. Yes, piggy, piggy-fucking pigs! Some men, maybe, weren't raised and/or choose to treat women like a material items such as a couch or car stereo. Well for all of you fellas that have your wires slightly crossed, here is some good advise.

1) Women are not pieces of intimate meat for you to chew on for a while and then discard like the wrapper of a Big Mac.

2) Is it really that hard to open the door of the car for her? The front door? Not just on the first date but all the fucking time!

3) If she's had a hard day, give her a few minutes to gather her thoughts when she gets home. Rub her feet for a few minutes (even if they are a little stinky) before you unload your daily issues on her.

4) If it's cold outside, Get of your lazy ass and go outside and scrape her car windows before she goes to work. You may freeze your butt off but, many times, the sheets will be more than warm that night.

5) Tell the truth.

6) If you have issues with violently controlling women (punching,slapping etc.) women please stay out of the range of my rifle.

7) If she says "no", that means no.

Give her her space to live a life outside of you and your needs.

9) On your way home from work, yeah, stop at the store and buy some flowers, a card, a teddy bear or even some cheap-assed Taco-bell or? And do it outside the confines of birthdays and holidays. Buy her something just because you can. If you have no money, draw her a picture on as piece of paper.

10) Stand-up to her if she needs it.

11) If you do something stupid (because we all do) admit you were doing something stupid. Being stupid is in our blood, every once in while we can't help ourselves!

12) If she has male friends when you meet, she'll still have them after she dumps your jealous ass.

13) Don't ask her to suck your dick if you just got home from ten hours of sweaty hard work.

14) Tell her she looks nice and compliment her. Don't be an idiot about it, just once in a while to let her know that you notice.

15) She is not you, don't attempt to make her so.

16) Go see the "chick-flick" even if it hurts.

17) Remember her eye color, birthday, anniversary etc.

1 Your dick does not have a mind of it's own.

19) Stubble will scratch the snatch.

20) If other men find your girlfriend/wife attractive, be proud that she's with you, not an asshole about it.

21) Answer the questions like "Does this make me look fat" or "does the meatloaf taste good?" truthfully. Just cover your face and nuts first.

22) Change the oil in her car. YOU want to put your dick inside HER body, it's really not too much to ask!

23) If she cries, let her cry. Maybe it's nothing. Give her a shoulder and wait.

24) Let her use your tools.

25) If her mother mother doesn't like you, you may not be around long.

26) Defend her honor.

27) Protect her from harm -all the time!

2 Call her at work just to say "have a nice day".

29) Help around the house-even on football Sunday's. Yes-fucking football Sunday!

30) If she cannot reach something high on a shelf, Yup, you guessed it, get of your ass and get it for her. It not her fault she's a foot shorter.

I could go all night but I'll leave it be.

See ya.

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