49AK 56M
1074 posts
5/15/2006 12:44 pm

Last Read:
5/17/2006 1:23 pm


I am kinda glad that I have actually made it a point to blog regularly. When I was in grad school, I wrote a lot, but that is because it seemed like there was a paper due every other day. Since my Masters is in Communication, there was a lot of emphasis on writing and journaling regularly, which is, of course, what blogging is.

One of the things that had bothered me a bit about my writing was that most of the stuff that I really liked a lot were things that were negative or in some other way, less than the happiest of happy endings. This is especially true of things that were explicitly sexual.

This weekend when I was driving around Alaska, I listened to some podcasts I had downloaded, and one of them was an interview with Erica Jong, the author of the iconic "Fear of Flying". She talked about some of the sex in her books, and she made the interesting point that a lot of the sex in her books was bad sex, or no sex at all. She said that (essentially) the human experience is not one positive sexual experience after another. So bad sex and no sex is a lot more realistic, and it is what the readers can identify with.

Perhaps this is the difference between literature and pornography (if you subscribe to the belief that there is a difference). With pornography, you always know there will be a happy ending (literally and figuratively), and with literature, you don't know how it will end.

I have plenty of positive sexual experiences, and I wouldn't trade them for anything. When I am with someone, I root for the happy ending. But I rarely write about them, because while they are great memories, they're not compelling reading. It's a lot more fun to write about the fumbles, and what might have been, and what thankfully wasn't.

So now I don't feel so self-conscious about sounding whiny.

Longwoodlovers 60M/59F

5/15/2006 2:53 pm

It's easier to be critical or judgemental of less than perfection. After all, who are we to expect perfection? Right? Someone, if only ourselves, must remind us of how the world really is. We can't expect everything to go right. That wouldn't be real. That wouldn't be us. And the worst anyone can do is be untrue to themselves.
That's the prevailing view. Misery loves company.

It's harder to be supportive or openminded. That's for phonies or people who are trying to get something from you. Right?

rm_PurryKitty2 49M/51F
9753 posts
5/15/2006 4:31 pm

I know I like writing about our fumbles too. Good point!

Purry {=}


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