Some lesbians have REAL problems  

3Spell6bound9 51M/48F
50 posts
9/1/2006 11:42 pm

Last Read:
10/5/2006 2:25 pm

Some lesbians have REAL problems


It's only been maybe 6 years or so since I "came out of the closet" and openly admitted everything that I like. Growing up and living the majority of my life in South Carolina aka "The Bible Belt", it was very hard for me to accept my own sexuality, let alone admit when asked or tell someone I was bisexual. But now that I think about it, no one ever asked me about my sexual preference. I'm glad, because I would have lied anyway.

Relocating to Seattle was a breath of fresh air for me. A liberal city with lots of open minds and opportunities as well as much diversity everywhere. It's nice to live in a place where lots of things are tolerated and accepted. Yes, we still have a ways to go with laws and such, but damn! Be happy about what you CAN do up here!

The first job I had when I moved up here was at this Insurance company downtown. Like I had already realized, most folks were downright rude and obnoxious. (more on that subject later) Most of the folks I worked with were not really nice at all, but there was this one woman who was nice to me….nice to me in a very professional kind of way.

She was tall, big and very manly. I could tell she was a lesbian, but I really liked her personality. She was one of the very few women there who would actually talk to me, and by “talk to me”, I mean start and hold an actual conversation with me.

She told me all about her partner and showed me pictures of her family and the trials and tribulations they went thru together. She shared her work/injury issues with me and even asked my opinion about them. I grew quite fond of her.

I asked her to eat lunch with me one day and she happily agreed. At the table, we talked about more personal things and I asked her if I could confide something in her. She was more than happy to listen, so I told her about this other woman that worked in my department and how I thought she was really dominant looking and sexy. I told her about my fantasy of being a slave to a beautiful woman and my bisexuality. Her eyes sparkled and she smiled while she listened. I continued pouring this out to her and even told her about my sexy husband and how we have shared two other women since we’ve been married. She said she was glad that my husband knows and is accepting of me as a whole. She even told me of a sexy bi girl she knew that would really like my looks and personality and offered to set us up for a little meeting. Unfortunately, we never got around to that because I left that piss poor job soon after our lunch date. I have to say, she was the nicest lesbian I have ever met.

I’ll never forget one thing she told me and it severely disappointed me. She warned me of other lesbians in this region and how they react to bisexual women. Evidently, some lesbians get really pissed off when they meet or otherwise find out a woman near them is bisexual. They will do their best to degrade, humiliate and be very rude to the bisexual woman. Apparently, lesbians feel that bisexual women are “in denial” and are really full-blown lesbians. Although this was disappointing to me, I fell out of the chair laughing!! I said, “You’ve GOT to be kidding!” Nope, she was serious. I proceeded to tell her how sexually greedy I am: guess what? I want BOTH! I told her, “If lesbians want to choose between satin and silk, leather and lace, prime rib and prime time, coffee and chocolate, more power to them! I’m greedy! I want BOTH!” I refuse to choose! She got a kick out of that and laughed heartily.

So on I go to various websites, one at a time, posting my little ad to find “friends with benefits” also willing to maybe/possibly join both my husband and I. Although I have permission to play alone, I prefer to share my playmate with my hubby. I kinda put off my lesbian friend’s advice until I got a nasty little email in my inbox one day:
“You are pathetic! You are cheating on your marriage and lying to your husband. You’re not being fair to him at all….you should be ashamed of yourself. Do you realize that you are actually in denial? You are really a lesbian in denial “ and blah, blah, blah, yada, yada, yada. This was not the only nasty little email I got from a lesbian, there were several.

Well, well, well. Much to my chagrin, my old lesbian friend was right. I proceeded to explain to this “well-wisher” how sexually greedy I really am. I also added that it was very ironic that she would send to me such an email when all their little advocates and activists cry and bitch about equal rights and equal treatment for gays and lesbians. They expect to be treated correctly but then turn around and lamblast someone who is bisexual? How hypocritical is this? It’s not only hypocritical, it’s laughable as well. What an idiot!

Speaking of gays and lesbians, I often wonder why society needs to know your sexual preference anyway. I’m referring to the subject of non-discriminatory laws like employment and housing. For example: Why do you feel it’s necessary to tell a potential landlord you are gay? Coming out of the closet is a good thing, but why do you feel the need to broadcast this to employers and sellers of homes? If I’m interviewing for a job, I’m certainly not going to tell my interviewer, “Hey, I’m bisexual. I swing both ways. Is that ok with you?” What the fuck business is it of his, anyway? Or why would a gay male tell a homeowner selling their house, “Hey, I’m gay. I’m going to buy your house, have my man over and let him fuck me in the ass. Is this ok with you?” If people would keep this kind of private information private, they would not have to worry about the possibility of being discriminated against in regards to employment or housing.

Not only at that old job, but other women around Seattle that I have met have warned me about going to places like “The Wild Rose” because I’ll get treated very negatively once they find out I’m married and just looking for FWB’s. Boy, for a liberal city that is supposed to “embrace and tolerate diversity”, there sure are a lot of hypocrites out here.

~Ani Ni (the wife)

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