this is a sex site dammit  

your_gypsy 51F
128 posts
11/8/2005 8:20 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

this is a sex site dammit

i can't come to this site without seeing somewhere, whether it is in a message mailed to me in response to my profile/ad or my blog, or even seeing it in the advice columns and groups, where some fuck is saying "this is a sex site!!" and shrieking about how wrong we folks, who think and feel beyond putting body parts together, are in using this site for anything but cumming. how unimaginative...

today i open my mailbox to see not one but two shrill letters from the same guy who emailed me a few days ago to show me a picture of his cute self and say he liked my profile and would like to go out with me. i emailed him back and said thanks for writing, you have read my profile, right, and know that i'm not advertising for sex partners right now... so he was responding with these two messages to say how unfair i was being to "ask" him to "accept" the fact that he can't have sex with me. he also said i'm "too hot not to be having sex." lol...

i am tempted to end this post right here and open up for comments, particularly from people who know me, which would be fun and engaging, but i will go on because not everyone knows me and i am happy to elaborate and help someone, anyone, to open their minds a little bit more. it benefits us all.

i would take my profile down altogether if it weren't for the people who would balk at that action. there are places here that i like to be involved in and when i go there, folks like to see who i am. just as anyone would like to know who they were talking to. how would it be if i were talking to you for a while and you went to view my profile and it was missing? so i keep it up there and the questions and basic info was filled out some time ago and i don't change that on a regular basis because it is a part of me that still exists.

having my profile up and including even my measurements (which he pointed out, of course) does not mean i am advertising for sex partners. and because i am not advertising for sex partners, it does not mean i am not having sex. it does not mean that i am closed off to having sex with someone who approaches me the right way and who i discover to be a quality person and eventually may want to share that with them.

i'm not advertising for sex partners because i have one available if i want. i can have two or three more if i truly want that because there is chemistry there and if *we both* want that enuf it would happen. that part is easy. but it takes its toll on me. i get attached to people i'm having sex with, for the most part. i have a person in the background right now and that works out fine because we have been honest with each other from the beginning and have built that loose relationship on just that, sex. so now naturally what i would want eventually is something more meaningful. if i already have someone to take care of the basic physical need from time to time, it makes sense that i don't need another. after all, i'm not a *man*...

i put my measurements up and leave the fantasy stuff up there for people who can read and think. i like to leave it open for women, or men, couples... to contact me with what drew them to me. many times yeah it is the sex, purely. and i answer those gracefully and openly, politely, and explain where i'm coming from. sometimes, once in a while, i find the situation intriguing enough that i will investigate further and something may come of it. i'm not closed off to that.

it is the person or people who read between the lines, are realistic and honest and not totally into themselves but interested in *me* enough to want to truly *know* me who realize that i'm not closed minded but they have to approach me in that way and they just simply take the chance. this is how i've made these exquisite connections with extraordinary people "outside the box" including all around this world.

the possibilities are endless with this "sex site." don't try to box it into your (not personal, but general) small mind.

personal growth is sexy...

AlbertPrince 57M

11/8/2005 11:46 am

Don't forget there are many, many men on this site who have never written a blog, chatted in a chat room or IM'd someone and are only here purely on the off chance that they might hook up with someone for sex. I was giong to say, make allowances for them, but you don't even have to do that. Some of them do not have the sense to realise that the way you first approach a woman, more than likely determines the outcome. Just accept that they are and learn to ignore them without getting upset.

Nice tits by the way, fancy a fuck sometime?

rm_mtnravyn 60M
890 posts
11/8/2005 3:48 pm

One of my favorite writers:
"How is one to live a moral and compassionate existence when one is fully aware of the blood, the horror inherent in life, when one finds darkness not only in one's culture but within oneself? If there is a stage at which an individual life becomes truly adult, it must be when one grasps the irony in its unfolding and accepts responsibility for a life lived in the midst of such paradox. One must live in the middle of contradiction, because if all contradiction were eliminated at once life would collapse. There are simply no answers to some of the great pressing questions. You continue to live them out, making your life a worthy expression of leaning into the light." Barry Lopez, "Arctic Dreams"

Ditto AlbertPrince This is "AdultFriendFinder" Regretably that is defined by age not maturity or decency or respcet for self. It also has to do with which mind a male is, I hesitate to call it this, thinking. The beauty of AdultFriendFinder is that sensuality, by its very nature, is enigmatic and paradoxical, as are its members.

I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman
with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My
friend said, "Wouldn't the chain rip out every time
she turned her head?" I explained that a person's nose
and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which
way the head is turned. My friend also votes!

jim5131 55M
1296 posts
11/9/2005 12:50 am

heyyou....I'm with both previous posts (Albert! I've never seen you write so much...especially the last line..I laughed by butt off!)

The freedom that this site offers has one drawback: it allows the same freedoms to 'those' guys..I'd like to say that I take the good withthe bad, but us guys generally don't get a lot of 'gay hookup' and 'pussy shot' emails....a few, not enough to call it flattery..

dano6332 56M

11/9/2005 8:24 am

LOL Gypsy, We all know this will never end or change. My girl's profile states "in a monogamous relationship" and still receives 10 mails a day asking her to sneak away for a good time. I am so tired of mindless morons who feel if they want it than dammit you must want it to.

LEARN TO READ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dont let the morons get you down

Choozmi 50M

11/9/2005 1:18 pm

I don't thing people will ever stop searching for a "sure thing". Many seem to think this site is a sure thing (it certainly advertises itself as such).

My advice, for what it's worth, is to never respond to anyone on this site who approaches you in a negative way or who makes you feel uncomfortable. If someone could give you the willies with a few lines in an e-mail, imagine how they could freak you out in person.

There's really no way to filter out the weirdos. You just have to ignore them and don't let them ruin your day.

JibedMewedTiffs 48M
2 posts
11/10/2005 12:16 am

You know, I said this once in a private post to you, and I'll say it again in public: On behalf of those decent individuals among the male species, I apologize that so many of us are jackasses. The first time I corresponded with you, did I mention ANYTHING about sex? No, and do you know why? BECAUSE I CAN READ!!! Come on, guys, read ALL their info before you ask " Hey, wanna get naked?" . Show a little class and intelligence. I know it's hard for some of you, but if you're not going to try, move on to the ones that have the nude pics up, you'll probably be a lot happier, instead of trying to make some real friends, which I have.

your_gypsy 51F

11/10/2005 7:13 am

cowboydid2: but this is a sex site, dammit! how dare she put up pictures of herself and even give her measurements when doesn't want to have any sex? she is just a big tease. me, i'm here to FUCK! FUCK!! FUCK!! FUCK!! as many wimmin as i can! and i want only the best so NO FAT CHICKS! and no BAGGAGE!


by the way... that clown actually wrote back after that exchange of several emails. after i clarified that i can have it if i want it but i want something *more* -- he said oic, you are dating a poor guy and you want to find a rich guy, etc, etc.

shakes head, rolls eyes...

i had no choice. i set him free to dazzle the other fair maidens who are so plentiful and are just dying to have sex with the rare boys like him.

i must be a lesbian. snort...

rm_Othello06 49M
3 posts
11/10/2005 11:32 pm

You are a very gifted and skilled writer. I generally breeze through blogs, but I found yours very compelling. I am new to AdultFriendFinder but I am sure I will be back to read you again.


your_gypsy 51F

11/11/2005 1:36 pm

gosh how nice, thank you Othello!

feeling all warm and fuzzy now..

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