IF YOU NEED IT, I BET I HAVE IT!  

yagottalikit 49F
824 posts
2/1/2006 11:23 am

Last Read:
3/23/2008 4:51 am

IF YOU NEED IT, I BET I HAVE IT!

It's probably in the garage.....

Well. (Insert heavy sigh, here)
I have taken on the undaunting task of cleaning out my mother's garage. There is NO light at the end of this tunnel ~ and I've been at it for several days, now. This particular feat became necessary when Hinky hinkawaza and I decided I should officially move in. (teenage daughter and all...but that's a different story)

A little background for you ~ My mother has lived in this particular house 17 years. My mother, also, does not let go........OF ANYTHING! She seems to think there will be a shortage of plastic grocery bags {among other things} in the near future. Years after things give up the fight to live and peacefully cross over to household item heaven, she insists on keeping them. A typical dialogue resembles any one, sometimes all, of the following:
Mom; "It's a good _______{whatever it may be}" Me; "It certainly was the best of it's kind 30 years ago, Mom. It did it's job longer than expected. Allow it to die with dignity." or "Maybe it can be fixed." "Perhaps, mother. The last living repairman for this particular item is living in a nursing home in North Dakota, shall we ship it off to him and see if he has spare parts lying around, since none can be ordered any longer? "Well, can't you fix it?" (At this point, frustrated, I decide to humor her) "sure Mom, let me take it with me" or "Somebody might need one." This one refers to items that might still work, but, has seen more than a few better years. I speak under my breath as I reply something like "Most would rather sleep on a floor of nails than on that ragged, stained, springless mattress that I just may have been conceived on." This exasperates her which then beckons the martyr in her. {I TRY to avoid this, at all cost}

At various stages, over the last 17 years, one of her offspring has moved in with her (mostly with one or more people in tow). My brother, one of my sister's and I have all done our share of disrupting her peace. We, naturally, brought with us the belongings we would later need or simply couldn't part with, ourselves. Each one leaving quite a few of those very items behind when moving on. Suffice it to say, there are roughly 3 entire households, plus mom's extra household (for emergencies) residing in that spacious 2 car garage.

Yesterday I donated 6 large trash bags full and 3 medium sized boxes of clothing to charity. I had to throw away much more that were ruined. Toys, papers, books, dishes, chest of drawers, bed frames, desks, couches, tables, chairs, mattresses, TV's, computer equipment, Christmas decorations, old knick-knacks, tools, parts of everything one could ever dismantle (I'm pretty sure I pulled an entire car, a piece at a time, out of there). Courtesy of my brother, there's every copy of "Cannibus" magazine ever printed ~ plus a few duplicates. There's an old countertop, a folding closet door, approximately 15 coffee carafes ~ only 3 coffee makers (non-working, of course) The list goes on and on... it's unbelievable!

I first stepped into the floor-to-ceiling-crap-stuffed-garage when I discovered the city would be providing it's semi-annual large trash pick-up. After filling mom's curb space, three of her neighbors gracefully offered some of their space. I managed to get the major items out, along with some of the branches I trimmed from her trees about a month ago.

Piling this stuff at the curb is a chore in and of itself, but, with Mom being who she is, I had to do things covertly. Hiding certain items, covering things, etc. There's this old console TV she's insisted on clinging to for years now. I don't think it's worked since the late 80's. I've tried and tried to sneak it out to the curb every six months, to no avail. This time, I got smart! I disguised it.....I grabbed the cordless screw gun and took the damn thing completely apart. It worked. No more stupid, bulky TV and Mom is none the wiser. I doubt she will ever know. (Although, she usually goes looking for something immediately after I've, discretely, discarded it). I set an ancient printer out and she nearly fainted. I explained that they don't even make the ink for those anymore ~ let alone replacement parts. (maybe I'll find some while cleaning) Choking back tears, she relented. But, only after I had proven there were 6 other printers stashed safely inside.

Anyway, while purging ~ I would imagine I've managed to toss something "valuable" that belonged to one of family members. I figure there's gotta be some sort of statute of limitations regarding possessions left behind. Perhaps, after two years of not stepping foot in there to make a claim, it's up to the cleaner's discretion. Seems to me it can't be that "valuable", anyway. No one else has taken the iniative to handle the overwhelming situation or to even assist.....
So, I reserve the right to throw away, donate or blow up whatever I deem necessary.

Don't you agree?



Yagotta get it soft and wet so we can kick/stick it


ByteChaser2 52M

2/1/2006 4:27 pm

Way to go! Yayyyy you

I always take the "If you haven't looked inside this box for 3 months, you don't need it" stance. Be firm! Be strong! Pitch the circa 1958 blender with the missing top and frayed cord! Recycle that collection of used Sunday newspapers from the late 1970's! Pitch all those dismembered doll parts! I'm right there with ya


mtdude2 55M  
117 posts
2/1/2006 6:05 pm

Lets fix up your mother with my father, they could rent a warehose together and all their shit would live happily ever after


rm_hinkawaza 52M
371 posts
2/1/2006 8:42 pm

Wait just a cotton pickin' minute Sweetie, you never said anything about blowing things up!!!! Why, that is one of my specialties!!! I'm really, really, really good at it!!! If I'd known this Baby, I would've definitely been over there with you!!!

P.S.-Don't let the events of this evening cloud your judgement as to the safety of my handling explosives!


RockPebble 69M
2476 posts
2/3/2006 7:14 am

My rule of thumb is if they don't care to help then they won't miss it. Also, anything they decide to save requires them to carry something else of their's to the curb. Good luck.


demonicsexkitten 41F
10671 posts
2/3/2006 6:42 pm

Congratulations on getting some of it out

After my grandma died, mom went through the house and got rid of stuff on grandpa's orders. She contacted family members, told them what she was doing, if they wanted anything come help... or at least grab what they want. She called people every time to let them know when she was going to be at the house going through stuff. Naturally, months later, after she'd cleaned out 95% of the junk... everybody started calling, angry and hurt because they didn't get ________. (Mom also did similar but not as thorough junk-tossing while grandma was alive... about every 10 yrs.)

I don't know how ppl do it... get rid of the stuff. I've been working on weeding out junk in my apartment for a while (living out of a storage unit tends to help junk build up. Didn't realize till I got my own place).


rm_anacortes 74M
2850 posts
3/3/2006 3:59 pm

Good luck.. I will try to email you a photo of my Mom, now age 92.

Namaste


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