Dick Joke of the Day  

wildfirecoyote 59M
27 posts
12/14/2005 3:27 pm

Last Read:
3/28/2006 1:25 pm

Dick Joke of the Day

Robin Williams once said, "Always go for the dick joke."

A man went into a men's room and saw a man wearing a trench coat standing facing a urinal but not urinating. At first the man was puzzled, but then he noticed the man's coat sleeves were empty and hanging loose. Apparently the man had lost both arms at sometime in the past. The man in the trench coat looked at the first man and said, "I hate to ask this, but would you mind helping me out?"

The first man was a little hesitant, but he sympathized for the guy and said, "Yeah, sure. No problem." He then opened the man's fly, pulled out his penis, let him urinate, shook it, placed it back, and zipped up his fly.

As he stepped back to wash his hands, he asked the armless man, "War wound or industrial accident?"

The armless man's sleeves moved slightly as he dropped his hands down to their full length and replied, "Neither. V.D. I didn't want to touch it." Then he bolted from the restroom.

This is not a dick joke, but it is funny--especially if you substitute the names of two people you know for those of the characters. I'm going to call them Dick and George and let you supply the last names.

Dick and George were driving along one day with Dick behind the wheel, when Dick said, "Hey, George, wanna see a neat trick?"

"Sure," said George.

Dick reached into the back seat and pulled out a small duffel bag, which he sat on the dashboard and unzipped. Instantly, a small monkey leaped out and sat beneath the rear view mirror.

"Wow, that's neat," said George.

"Oh, that's not the trick," said Dick. "Watch this."

Dick suddenly reached up and slapped the shit out of the monkey. The monkey was stunned for a moment, but immediately jumped down into Dick's lap, opened his zipper, blew him, zipped him back up, then jumped back onto the dashboard, and wiped his mouth.

"Wow, that's incredible!" said George.

"Wanna see it again?" asked Dick.

"Sure," said George.

Dick reached up and slapped the shit out of the monkey again. Again the monkey was momentarily stunned, but he once again recovered quickly, immediately jumped back down into Dick's lap, gave him another blowjob, jumped back onto the dash, and wiped his mouth.

"Wow, that's still incredible!" said George.

"You wanna try it?" asked Dick

"Sure!" said George, "just don't slap me so hard."

RedheadedMedStd 34F

12/23/2005 7:34 pm


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