would we...could we  

wickedeasy 66F  
14999 posts
7/16/2006 9:26 am
would we...could we


have you ever made it so difficult for someone to get close to you that they give up trying?

have you ever been so difficult to be around that you look up and find yourself alone - deservedly so?

is it possible to get back to something wonderful when hurt has been handed back and forth so many times?

did you ever feel like if you could just breathe, maybe, maybe you could make it through the day?

can someone be so intrinsically a part of you that despite ...... anything........ you simply can't imagine your life without them in it?

if you own your own shit, how long does it take before the person you threw it at gets past it?

does it make sense to talk when all you feel like doing is crying?

does it make sense to cry when what you really need to do is talk?

can you really say what you feel and ever feel truly comfortable having to explain why?

does wanting EVER make it so?

fine here, really, just trying to figure out how to be a grown up

You cannot conceive the many without the one.


rm_shannee2006 52F
3355 posts
7/16/2006 11:49 am

I have come to realize that I push people away sure...but I am starting to notice that the real friends I have...the real loved ones...they know damned well that I do that and they love me despite that. They hang out. They reflect to me and they don't take my shit seriously. They don't participate in that crap with me. They just say something humorous about what an idiot I'm being and move on with what we're there to do. I can assess my willingness to keep doing the dance or not. Sometimes I do and sometimes I don't. I've known for years that I do this with peopl, and despite that I still do it sometimes. Been doing it alot this year. I been feeling very vulnerable and I've felt the need to not disclose some things in my life that are making huge changes in me...and so that means that it's not so easy to share the outcomes with them.

I also push people away when I just feel overwhelmed...and again in the last few weeks I've been really and truly feeling overwhelmed...about alot of things.

Figuring out how to be grown up? Shit, Fuck and Damnation woman. Who the hell knows how to do that...?! Maybe the Dalai Llama has that one figured out. I think my soul's got a clue, but I don't listen so good to that one alot of the time.

Yup...this juiciness is from me....

S


wickedeasy replies on 7/17/2006 5:39 am:
see Shannee - if i let my soul lead - i can get there

it's just this damn brain of mine

Mermaidslut 49F

7/16/2006 2:11 pm

(((hugs)))

Cause I need them right now too. I just am feeling like I got pushed away first, from someone that is overwhelmed and afraid of rejection by me... and there is not a damn thing I can do about it but stand around looking silly with my arms held out open, waiting, till one of us gives up and walks away. Damn clock is still ticking on his side, if I give up before the buzzer dings, he will have been right. I am more stubborn then a bull sometimes


wickedeasy replies on 7/17/2006 5:41 am:
stubborn?

wanna start a club? stubborn ass women? SAM's club - lol

god, sometimes i just wanna slap myself silly

warmandsexy52 64M
13164 posts
7/16/2006 3:01 pm

I should have been a grown up a long time ago but I never really figured how. Which is why I find the questions so difficult to answer. I do think that once hurt has happened, even if it has healed, there may well be emotional scars that never fully go away.

Hugs

warm xx


wickedeasy replies on 7/17/2006 5:42 am:
true and then it really isn't ever the same - it may be good - hell, it may even be better, but never the same again - sighs

libgemOH 56M/52F

7/16/2006 3:24 pm

Still thinking growing up is highly overrated!!

As to all your questions....when you figure them out, please share!! -B X:


wickedeasy replies on 7/17/2006 5:43 am:
figure them out???????

jeeze, i was hoping you all would do that for me

rotfl - hugs to you my friend

MaggiesWishes 59F

7/16/2006 6:16 pm

Today, I feel as tho I'm looking at all these questions as if, for the firt time.
Or maybe they were scripted just for my thoughts to see in black and white.
Hummmmm...
warm huggies 2ya Sis


wickedeasy replies on 7/17/2006 5:47 am:
i gave this list to a friend - He said, there are no right answers
only the journey

i hate it when he's right - lmao

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