are you talking to me???  

wickedeasy 66F  
14952 posts
9/2/2006 6:52 am
are you talking to me???

The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right place but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.
Dorothy Nevill

i admit that in the last few weeks i have been sorely tempted to put out in the world the reality of a situation. to breach confidentiality just so i could feel better and so people would stop thinking of me as the evil one.

raised eyebrow. a shake of the head. a sigh. a barely hidden smirk. all of these can let people know what you really think of what they are saying without saying anything. but words aren't the only way we communicate are they? and while they are powerful tools, words are also molded by tone and by attitude.

"yes, i love you" - say it with a smile and a look of joy - that's one thing. say it sotto voice and with your shoulders hunched - another thing all together. shout it to the heavens - well that's just a woohoo moment.

written words - as we use here - are open to interpretation as well. without inflection heard or body language seen, one can easily misinterpret meaning.

one reads words based on one's own emotional state, needs, fears. what was meant as a joke becomes a jibe. here in the blogs, there are writing styles that are open and clear. others that are cryptic or sly.

so, how to judge the intent? i doubt one can, at least with any degree of certainty.

i keep hearing this or that about that one or this one - and to be honest - i don't know that much about most of the folks here to make any kind of informed judgment.

you talking to me? you talkin' to me?

before we all go pushing over tv sets and getting all riled up, let's step back a moment and give each person the benefit of the doubt. no raised eyebrows. no shakes of the head. assume the best. yanno?


You cannot conceive the many without the one.

Theflinkychick 105F

9/2/2006 8:27 am

I don't have the first clue what situation that you are talking about, a whole lot of the blog drama that goes on. Often I don't understand even when I think I know what has happened. Even so, I can't think you are a evil one!

I got an email the other day from a man telling me that I tried to hard to get people to like me and to like everyone. I don't KNOW what motivates a person to make the comment they left so I remain polite and take it in the most benign way possible and respond accordingly so perhaps that is why that fellow that I was being too nice. But then I didn't see his face or hear his tone of voice when he "said" too me so he could have been mocking me, but I just thanked him for his concern and left it at that.

Sadly, the fact that we will never have to face most of the people we make our comments to gives many people the freedom to say things they never would say to a person face to face. I choose to err in the other direction and let things pass on line that I would have a smart ass comment for in real life because I just can't be sure there was ill intent. If I get a comment in my blog that is obviously intentionaly nasty I just delete it and forget it. That hasn't happened too often, thank bloggness...

Not all who wander are lost.

wickedeasy replies on 9/2/2006 11:15 am:
i have read lines one way, then gone back and read them the other way - someone did a cool post of punctuation (can't remember now) but the placement of a comma or a period entierly changed the message just as tone or body language can

i assume good intent
that way, if they were being a snot - they look silly

Theflinkychick 105F

9/2/2006 8:31 am

*perhaps that is why that fellow THOUGHT I was being too nice...

I would love to be able to edit comments, there are more typos in there but that was the worst... me sowwy...

Not all who wander are lost.

wickedeasy replies on 9/2/2006 11:19 am:
girl - i am the QUEEN of typos - grins

ask folks in the basement - i only do better here because of spellcheck

MaggiesWishes 59F

9/2/2006 8:53 am

I know that when writing any story line ... I look for "words" that can sound within the mind of the reader and that gives it a closer reality and more "uumph" to get my point across. Certain words prompt emotion more so than others of the same meaningful group.

However, when in conversation online, I find that my words are sometimes ... deaf to the receiver, and therefore the emotion that is carried with it, somewhere between my monitor and theirs, is lost. Alas ... things get twisted or sound 'stand offish' when probably neighter is the case. I tend to think that "southern" folks just use too many adjectives and therefore make the story longer than necessary and the point is lost in translation, hey, I could be wrong?
Did ya get that, ya'll?

Sis, I can't wait to sit down with you, over a drink, (tea, coffee or something) and view more of the world from your level.
Sending you "positive" energy and warm huggies to surround you.

wickedeasy replies on 9/2/2006 11:22 am:
i like the southern tone - love faulkner, pennwarren, etc

that richness is slow and smooth -

i guess the whole point is - you can make any comment into something else - depending on your mood or expectation - see Silk's use of the word oh

so mags - playing phone tag sucks

warmandsexy52 64M
13164 posts
9/3/2006 3:44 am

Maybe it's that very English streak I have, then again maybe not, but I really do believe in discretion on this friendly site. What I don't say is as important as what I do, not because I want to "create" any particular impression, but it is simply an extension of the "rules" I apply to my life in general.

I trust my inner voice when writing something. I'm not fazed by how lewd my content is, but I am by any chance of upsetting others, especially friends.

I have never thought of your blog any less than with a truly high regard. If you are berating yourself, then don't - there is no need to. If you are not, then you can see how subtle interpretation and misinterpretation can be.

Blog on, dearest wicked and may your Blogmuse be with you. {=}

warm xx

wickedeasy replies on 9/3/2006 6:15 am:

i am finding it interesting that people assume i was writing about me

but thanks warm - i will blog on - for a while at least

tight hugs to you - you nasty spider killer

somethingelse40 74M
14676 posts
9/3/2006 7:22 am

Sometimes it's hard to remember what I want from you; can you give me a hint?

wickedeasy replies on 9/3/2006 7:52 am:
a straight man?

ButteryDelight 58F

9/4/2006 12:00 pm

i give people the benifit of the doubt. Well..i try to. But, it is not always easy to do that to the comment of "go to Hell" and "what do you know?

be a duck, WE..rain slides right down their backs and off of their bodies with out wetting the precious soft feathers underneath...and the duck swims on..

Buttery Delight

wickedeasy replies on 9/5/2006 10:08 am:
winks and goes off quacking

somethingelse40 74M
14676 posts
9/6/2006 4:57 pm

Is life the kind of puzzle you put together, or the kind you take apart?

wickedeasy replies on 9/7/2006 4:36 pm:
both - DOH

Suicidia 50F

9/6/2006 11:02 pm

Can I just say *note the complete lack of ill will in my voice here* - you are, without a doubt the LEAST evil person I know. Having said that *now a wry smile creeps over my lips*, you can be incredibly naughty from time to time!!

wickedeasy replies on 9/7/2006 4:37 pm:

that's why it's "wicked" easy

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