realization (the one that killed me)  

way2big2000 38M
18 posts
11/19/2005 2:15 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

realization (the one that killed me)


well hello, and how are we all today? me you ask well not so fucking good am i? no not at all. anyway.....so i was thinking the other day and i thought i should get all the #'s that i had for her (4) and call. so I'm going to payphone (trying to be sneaky) and then it hit's me. WHY (oh how that dame ? haunts me) but why what would to the fucking point? what would i say what would she say? and you know what it no longer matters does it? i came to the realization... I'm not ever going to see her again am i? no I'm not, even if she called today and wanted me back i would not go. are you surprised? i may be a lot of thing's but stupid is not one of them. i would not take the chance of going through this pain again. i know that ever thing in-side of me would be screaming out to take her back but no way in hell could i go through this hell again. so that what I'm dealing with. the realization of that is killing me. never to see her for the rest of my life. never to hold her never to kiss her? o.k. fine then when is the end to my story? when does this all go away?

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