Men are Like Parking Spots  

watchmesquirm 46F  
95 posts
10/18/2005 7:42 pm

Last Read:
7/11/2007 11:20 am

Men are Like Parking Spots

I have a classic case of I want what I cannot have. 'The good ones are always taken' or 'it's like meeting the man of my dreams, and then meeting his BEAUTIFUL wife' could easily read as the tagline of my life.

I don't think I would have become acquainted with the amazing married men that are in my life were it not for this website. But they are my friends nonetheless. I have never had sex with them, I have only met one of them and I do not judge any of them. Not one of them is open with his wife about his extracurricular activities and each one has different reasons and motives for seeking friendship and/or sex outside of his marriage.

Although I do not care to be the "other woman" I do really care about them. I am crazy enough to have feelings of love for one of my married friends. Here's the thing - I cannot help but wonder... are they really so great? Or is their appeal enhanced by their eligibility or lack thereof? And why are they attracted to me (besides the fact that I am a babe and completely fabulous of course!)? Is it because I have a vagina and am willing to talk to them?

What is wrong with me??? Wait! Puh LEAZE don't answer that! The better question (or more appropriate one in this context) is why do I seem to connect so deeply with guys that are completely unavailable?

Watchme

Oh yeah...
Men are like parking spots.... the good ones are taken and the rest are handicapped.

This is inspired by post from duststormdiva on infidelity.


Valdrane78 38M

10/19/2005 1:11 am

Well lets start with the availability. when I was married and had the ring on, I got hit on by more women than I could have ever imagined. Then when I got divorced, the women nearly stopped comming, it was rather aggrivating. I think some women are attracted to things they cannot have, and think that just because they (men) are married, it must mean they are stable, loving, understanding, passionate, and compassionate. When sometimes, it is quiet the opposite, they see everything they want out of a man in someone already in a relationship.

But all the see out of single men (mostly) are horny, immature kids just tring to get into their pants. Adn this has happened to me, a single guy walks up top a single women in a bar, and begins to talk to her, before he even gets the first word out, she has already decided who this guy is and totally gives him a cold shoulder. Now I am sure part of these women's problems and yours (possibly), is that you tend to meet the single guys who fit the description I gave above, so you could have been turning down decent single guys because of the morons you have encountered in the past. I havw only 1 piece of advice to give you. give them all a chance, you may just get surprised.

Of course this is all just my opinion, and you can choose to ignore it. I don't claim to know everything about a woman, I just use my experience to make a best guess.

BANG! POW! BOOM! a study in useless knowledge and sick humor!
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keithcancook 60M
17822 posts
10/23/2005 7:58 am

This phenomenon works both ways. I have the hots for my neighbors wife. Gawd help me...


CherryCurious 47F
186 posts
10/23/2005 12:03 pm

its easy to like the married ones, i think its because we don't have to put up with their shit everyday


watchmesquirm 46F  
99 posts
10/23/2005 7:08 pm

Valdrane78Thanks I actually thought about your comment this weekend. I remember when I got engaged and wore the ring that signified that I was taken but not quite yet, I felt so much more desirable. And as a result, I was more desirable.

keithcancookGod help us all!

CherryCuriousI think you are onto something. It reminds me of a song by Nina Simone about the other woman, and how she is so appealing because all she does is prepare for him and he doesn't see her with mashed potatoes in her hair with 4 kids hanging on her apron strings. I guess it is kind of similar. He is as good at home as he says he is. And he is desirable because he is unobtainable. Ugh.


grizzguy4u 57M

10/24/2005 10:37 am

...maybe its just because when we're married, we are relaxed and not on the prowl...we're acting natural, instead of like a dog in heat...and we may be stand-offish, a challenge (don't we all enjoy that - true competitor)...our body language says so much more than we are aware, methinks...and if i had to go through the desperation i felt as a bachelor again...groan, ughhh, no thank you...! I know deep down, we want to be nurtured or cared for, and if that ain't happening at home, then we go out searching...


mnfun952 102M

10/24/2005 8:00 pm

There's a lot of truth in what Cherry says..... Same with Foto.... there is a certain 'safety' in it (unless, of course, the wives find out).

Have a great night,

MnFun


rm_joeyklm2 45M

10/26/2005 12:02 am

Are they really so great? Obviously not. The one glaring flaw is that they're married yet still looking, at least on some level. If one of them left his wife and started a relationship with you, could you ever really trust that he was exclusive with you? How could you be truly secure?


watchmesquirm 46F  
99 posts
10/26/2005 6:04 pm

fotofinishr- yeah... the safety aspect. There is no threat that I will get pressure to commit. That is a good point.

grizzlyguy4u- yes, I can see how it would be easier to just be "you" when you are in a relationship... although personally I feel that this is where both men and women go wrong in relationships if it is taken too far. I want to my partner to still try to be his best self even if he knows he has me wrapped around his little finger. Keep me interested. I will do the same. There is a time to be comfortable and relaxed in any relationship... but don't let yourself get too sedentary.

mnfun952- scary! let's not even go there! lol

joeyklmn- thanks for visiting my blog. You are right- there would be no guarantee that there would be a monogamous relationship if I chose to become involved long term with someone who left his wife for me. And let me make this point clear- it is certainly nothing that I am wanting to happen.... to break up someone's marriage. They say that the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior. I agree with that. But I don't think that in the case of infidelity, that past behavior is necessarily an good indicator of a shady life partner. I don't have statistics, but I know that a lot of men cheat. And women too, but not to the extent that men do. Getting involved with ANYONE is a risky endeavor.


duststormdiva 51F
6854 posts
11/1/2005 9:39 pm

Obviously I attract married men too. I have been accused of not having a conscious because of the men I choose to date. These married men are simply men who are seeking someone who will give them something their wives won't, and it's not always sex. They like to feel alive when they talk to women. They like to feel appreciated and want to have their advances be desired. There is so much more to having an affair with married men than most would know, if they have not experienced it.

DustStormDiva


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