Duck! !! Or at least some other type of bird! Jul 2, 2009 3:28 am Mood: silly, 61 Views For those of you that know me, know what I do for a living. Those who don't I shall tell you. I work with our wonderful railway maintenance workers. Ok, I have to blow my own trumpet, as most commuters usually want to kill us, or at least do us some form of bodily harm, when we make their train late in the morning. All I can say for that is sorry, but sometimes things can be beyond our control & it might just take us a little longer to fix the problem. I came across just such a thing last weekend. Part of my job, is to brief people on the dangers of working out on track. This can include:- Keeping a lookout for trains still thundering past the site on the opposite track. Engineering trains moving on the same bit of track we are working on. Large diggers & dozers working. Hazardous materials buried under the track, (this also includes the contents of all the trains toilets). Poisonous plants. Electrical overhead cables & electrified 3rd rails. Asbestos, etc. The list does go on, but I wont bore you any more. The other things we have to tell them about is the different kinds of wildlife we could encounter. Badger setts. Newts, (£2000 a newt if you kill one, by the way). Endangered plant life etc. But the best one I had to tell people about was while I was working down the coast at the weekend. Killer seagulls from hell! We had to fix a piece of track that run beside their nests & the bastard birds kept on attacking the workmen. Dive bombing them from a great height & they are not small birds, they are big fuckers, when you get up close & personal, as they were trying to do! But I did have a great problem trying to tell the men, before they went out on track to be aware of them, with a straight face. They all thought I was taking the piss! They all found out, very soon, that I wasn't! 10 Comments

Sadly missed! Jun 16, 2009 8:43 pm Mood: mournful, 135 Views In the long view of history. What difference will any of our lives make? The true measure of a life, is not how many people know our name, when we die. But weather we have touched the lives of others! For my ex father-in-law, who passed away last Sunday morning. You will be missed by many. RIP. 18 Comments

Sunrise for the soul! May 27, 2009 8:31 pm Mood: 56, 162 Views As a night shift worker, I get to see lots of sunrises & sunsets in my job. I get to see the starts & the finishes of most days, sometimes in glorious Technicolor! As we approach summer, the nights seem to fly by. It only seems to be dark in a blink of an eye, compared with winter, when the night seems to drag on forever! In winter, I go to work in the dark & come home again in the dark, never seeing even a glimpse of the sun. I sometimes think that I would make a wonderful vampire in the winter time, as I would never be fried to a crisp, by the rising of the morning sun! I'm sitting here now, watching the sky as it changes from black, through a spectrum of colours, as the sun nears the horizon. Ready to unlock the dark for the light & a whole new day. The sight of which fills me with anticipation, of what this new day might bring my way! 22 Comments

You couldn't make it up! May 14, 2009 12:15 am Mood: 25, 134 Views I was watching the news last night, when a story came on to say that, 'Man Flu' really does exists! Well after I had picked myself back off of the floor, where I had been rolling around in fits of laughter, I carried on listening to the rest of the story. It seams men really do suffer more with colds then women, because they have a lower immune system than us, so find it harder to fight it off. Well after years of putting up with men 'dying' when they caught themselves a sniffle, I came to this one conclusion. Why do I think that the results of any tests carried out, were at the hands of a bunch of male doctors! Or am I just being a little cynical? I bet they all met up at their local one night & as the beers flowed, came up with a perfect way of getting us women, to bend over backwards, even more than they try to make us do so already, when they get themselves a runny nose! Let's just make up a paper which states, we really do end up on death door when we get a cold. And because a load of doctors came up with it, who just happened to be blokes, it must be true. I had to look at the date, just to make sure it wasn't the 1st of April! Also found myself sniffing a rather nasty smell of cattle in the air! 8 Comments

Stir crazy! May 6, 2009 9:52 pm Mood: Insane, 179 Views God I'm bored! I've have not been out of the house in over two weeks, except for work & the four walls are definitely starting to close in on me. I've started to have full conversations with the cat! Which really isn't a good sign. At least the cat tries to talk back, unlike my partner. The thing is, the cat is starting to make sense! I really need to get out & get hopelessly drunk, so that I can forget the fact that I have no money to pay the bills coming in. But that also is a catch 22 problem. No money for drink either. The only solution I have come up with so far, is to start selling my body by the pound! God, if I could do that, it would solve all of my problems. Well not quite all of them, but at least the money ones & the fact I could do with losing a few stone. I'm also really starting to wish that my cat was a man! Well, it's the only thing in my life that I can guarantee that, loves me unconditionally, wants to be with me 24/7, sleeps in bed with me every night & pines for me when I'm not there! Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever gotten all of those things out of one man before! Sod it, I think I'm going to marry my cat! See, I told you I was going mad! 18 Comments

What I miss most! Apr 22, 2009 7:32 pm Mood: Unloved, 219 Views I finally know what I miss most about being in a abandoned relationship. Cuddles! The feeling of snuggling into someones chest & breathing in their smell, as they envelope you in their arms. You can loose yourself in a feeling of being totally wanted by another person. You can get used to living without sex & being kissed, but you can never really live without a hug! It really does make the world disappear. It can make you happy, when you're sad. It can make you feel safe, when you're feeling scared. It can make you strong, when you're feeling weak. It can calm you down, when you're feeling angry. It can make you warm, when you're feeling cold. A cuddle is so much more than you realize. It's only when you are deprived of them, that you get a sense of just how much they really means to you! 15 Comments

Nothing to sea! Apr 17, 2009 6:53 pm Mood: 92, 180 Views I love walking along a beach. With the soft breeze coming off of the sea, the sound of waves crashing onto the shore & the feel of the sand beneath my feet. Having lived by the sea, many years ago, I really miss it now that I have to live inland. So after 6 years of being deprived of the pleasures of the coast, I finally got my chance the other week. Well kind of! I had a few hours off in between shifts at work & I was only about 5 miles from the sea, so I took my chance. Unfortunately it was 9pm & very dark. So I found myself, on the beach in the pitch black with the tide out! I could still smell & hear the sea, but could not go for a paddle, as I couldn't see more than 10 feet infront of me. And do you know, it didn't make a blind bit of difference. It was still beautiful. Just to be there on a cloudless night with the heavens ablaze with stars & being the only person there was magical. Yes it may have been nice if I had gotten there a few hours earlier, to watch the sunset over the water. But the peace & quite at the time I did arrive, made up for it. So I sat on the beach, eating my fish & chips admiring the beauty of it all, before having to return to work. 10 Comments

Things that make us feel better! Mar 6, 2009 12:22 am Mood: questionable, 239 Views Isn't it funny how a song or a movie can change the way we feel in an instant? We can be happy & all it takes is a song on the radio or a weepy film, to make us sad! Or being sad & hearing a song that bring back happier times & makes us smile or a comedy that lightens our mood. I finally managed to buy myself my favorite film this week. (I knew ebay would be good for something one day!) It's only taken me 21 yrs to get a copy of it on dvd (slightly pirate copy granted)! It's of a very obscure film called Hawks, with Timothy Dalton. I should have been a cult film, but it was never released on dvd & only available on video in the states. I've only seen it on TV here twice since it was made. So it kind of lets the side down for it to acquire a great following! Bit of a shame really, as it deserves to be! I will admit it is a bit of both when it comes to it being either a film that will make you happy or sad! All I know is that when I watch it, it gives me a kick up the arse & makes me stop feeling sorry for myself. I have it good, compared with others! Also received today a copy of David Niven's film 'A matter of life & death'. That one just shows me that love can win over all obstacles, if you try hard enough. So what film/song, means something to you & why? It would be interesting to find out if there's a common film or song that affects both men & women in the same way! 14 Comments

Alright, enough already! Feb 23, 2009 2:57 am Mood: happier, 205 Views Ok, I've got the hint, I will try & be a little more up beat with my blogging from now on! What I will tell you is, that even I was getting a little peeved with myself & the mood that I was in! I hate feeling sorry for myself. I know we all have off days, weeks, years & blogging can be a very good way to let things, that have built up over a period of time, out to play. Sure beats knocking your head against a brick wall, & a hell of a lot less painful! I will admit, that my faith in human nature has been restored, after some of the comments others have left for me. It's nice to know that there are still some people out there, who care about the welfare of others. It seems to be a dying trend nowadays! Especially seeing that most of them were from people who I have never spoken to before. All I would like to say to you all is, thank-you very much, for being there, with you kind words, when I was in need of a ear. 7 Comments

Wanting more! Feb 19, 2009 8:12 pm Mood: dispondent!, 229 Views So how long should someone give another person the benefit of the doubt, before they call it a day? Being made to feel like a piece of crap most of the time is not good! I know that most would tell me to run like fuck away from what I have to put up with. But there is still a part of me, that still longs for what I had! It's still there, but I have no idea of how to retrieve it. If there is anyone out there, who has any idea of how I can get a spark back into my relationship, I would be eternally grateful. I'm not one to give up without a fight, if I can help it! Because I'm really coming to the end of my tether, & need some help from someone. Anyone! 12 Comments

Why don't people read! Feb 10, 2009 8:47 am 285 Views I'm starting to tire of people who don't read profiles properly! They choose to take in what they want to take in & ignore all the rest. Something like mine, in which I have stated that all I am looking for was on-line chat & emails. So why do I get offers of rampant sex in hotels, NOW! without the person even exchanging one single message with me? As for pictures of penis, I must have had enough now to open up my own penile art gallery! And what's the point of putting an age range in if no one takes any notice? Yes, I know that there are some people on this site that like that sort of thing. But, there are also many others who just want the thrill of opening up their mail & finding a friendly message & sometimes a good laugh with another fellow human being. I'm not a prude, by all means, but I would just like to get to know a person a little better first, before plunging head first into debauchery, that's all! 17 Comments

Feeling worthless! Jan 28, 2009 7:46 pm Mood: 44, 270 Views I'm sure that I'm not alone on this website in being ignored by a partner! That's why at least 70% of the people are here trying to find someone to love or want them! I have been sharing my house with a man who would rather get pissed or play chess rather than play with me. It's even gotten to the point of him playing on-line scrabble, rather than listening to what I may want out of life! He has even moved into the spare room so that I don't disturb him while he plays. Don't get me wrong, I have tried to get him re-interested in me. Tried to instigate sex by entering his domain. Something he has stopped trying to do, for me, over a year ago! After all, he claims to still love me/want me, & all that crap, & what do I get? Sweet FA or a mouthful of abuse! I think I would have better luck if I was a computer, at least he would want to try & take his time with me & push all the right buttons to achieve a result! I just want to feel something, from someone, before I leave this mortal coil for good! That's not too much to ask, out of life, is it? 14 Comments

I survived!!!! Jan 19, 2009 8:56 am Mood: 15, 270 Views Well I managed to get through two days of celebrating my birthday without falling off my stall once! Quite an achievement really, seeing the amount of alcohol I consumed. The thing that really made my night was watching all of the couples who attended, getting more & more ratty with their partners, the more they drunk. I found it highly amusing that with us all on this site looking for someone, when we do finally find them, all we do is bicker at one another. It seems that we are not happy being either alone or in love! The classic line out of one of my friends' new girlfriend was, 'I love him but I really hate him most of the time'. Just goes to show that love & hate are really both sides of the same coin! 12 Comments

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