He's Mine........  

vixenslounge 48M/48F
158 posts
6/1/2006 5:34 pm

Last Read:
6/12/2006 8:19 am

He's Mine........

Years that have passed.
Words that can kill your spirit.
Pain...an everlasting pain.
I have cried to many tears.
Becoming angry..has got me no-where.

Memories of child birth.
Vivid..as if yesterday.
Precious moments of him and I.
Are forever..loved in my soul.

Delays that have kept him.
From moving forward.
Interruptions in a life.
To young to comprehend.

Still..his strength.
Goes beyond his years.
His disabilities..never stopping him.
From becoming the man.
That he's slowly growing into.

When he cries.....I cry.
Forever joined in blood.
I've always said.
That i'd protect him.
Where did I go wrong?
Not protecting him.
From you.........

Accepting a child.
That you did not conceive.
Is difficult...at most.
To a certain degree..
I can understand.

Living in a home.
Full of bitterness and sorrow.
Making our surroundings.
Harder to live by.

Did he ask to be born.
This way?????? NO.!!!
Growing up with a father.
That was only a figment.
Of his imagination.
One that he wonders about.
On a daily basis.

Accepting you..as you entered our lives.
Yearning for that "friend"
That he could play football with.
Innocently craving the affection.
From a man...he could silently.
Wish for...to be his "dad".

Never before did i tolerate.
Such emotional abuse.
Against.....whats mine.
To love me..is to accept.
Whats mine..I've always spoken in truth.
Never sending the message.
That "we" weren't a packaged deal.

Still..anger consumes you.
Never shying away from.
Expressing your emotions.
And who's there.....
To witness it......

Wanting to escape this pain.
Only to have pain....
Slap me in the face.
My child....my baby.
One from you..one not.

Hiding in my shell.
Crying silent tears.
Please God.......
When well this change?

I know..............
Change will come.
When i'm the one.
To do the changing.......


rm_vixenflir 58M
295 posts
6/4/2006 12:29 pm

Heart felt words my lovely! I see the tears, but can't wipe them away for you. You know I would if I could. As a man in the same circumstance (imagine that!) I can only say "sometimes the magic works - and sometimes it don't". Sometimes the intruder is ALWAYS the INTRUDER and will never be or can never be.......more.


vixenslounge 48M/48F

6/4/2006 7:00 pm

    Quoting rm_vixenflir:
    Heart felt words my lovely! I see the tears, but can't wipe them away for you. You know I would if I could. As a man in the same circumstance (imagine that!) I can only say "sometimes the magic works - and sometimes it don't". Sometimes the intruder is ALWAYS the INTRUDER and will never be or can never be.......more.
Interesting choice of words.
I was upset when i wrote this.
Yet at the same time..
I'm proud of my poem.
As i should be.

I'm not very good at confrontations.
Thats why i choose to write down.
My feelings.I'm much better.
Expressing them this way.

Kisses miss vixen xoxo


smackyman 45M
3843 posts
6/6/2006 7:02 am

Wow...that piece is well written - and I'd like to comment on the situation behind it, but I feel that I'd be out of line as I know that you are expressing your feeling through this forum. Either way -thinking about what is going on for you...

Smacky


vixenslounge 48M/48F

6/9/2006 4:06 pm

    Quoting smackyman:
    Wow...that piece is well written - and I'd like to comment on the situation behind it, but I feel that I'd be out of line as I know that you are expressing your feeling through this forum. Either way -thinking about what is going on for you...

    Smacky
Thank you Smacky.....
for your thoughtfulness
your empathy
your compassion.
It was difficult...yet easy to write.
My emotions i hold dear to me
and i thank you
yet again
for respecting that.
Kisses miss vixen xoxo


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