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Virginity and the Nation RantOpus VIII - by LesLucid
"Virginity is sweeping the Nation." It was on "Today", or
"Good Morning Suckers", or one of those stupid shows.
Virginity is the latest craze. It's the cat's pajamas. Not
doing it is in. Doing it is out. Everyone is not doing it.
Get with it. This is no longer the Pepsi generation.
What's wrong with you? You're not like the rest. You're
out of style. You're neither hip nor cool, not to mention
far out or gnarly. Now you've done it and you'll be all
alone with your shame.
"Virginity is sweeping the nation." Abstinence is hot on
its tail. Purity is running wild in the streets. Chastity
is right behind. Everywhere you look there's moderation,
sobriety, and virtue. Righteousness is at the gates.
Boredom is landing on the beaches.
"Virginity is sweeping the nation." The vision: Nothing
outside of marriage and we mean a christian wedding. No
bone without a home. One and only one mate for life. No
thoughts below the belt. Concentrate on wholesome things.
See no evil, smell no evil, feel no evil. Don't touch.
Don't masturbate. Violators will be prosecuted to the full
extent of the Law.
"Virginity is sweeping the nation." The act: Lights out
before clothes off. A kiss or two. No touching below the
neck. No sucking. Nothing up the ass. Man on top, woman
on the bottom, face to face. Ejaculation in five seconds.
Uncunt. "I love you, dear." "I love you, dear." Clothes
on, no lights. Good night.
"Virginity is sweeping the nation." A propaganda campaign,
gleefully announced by the christian right. The big lie.
As though saying so makes it so. Yet another feeble attempt
by christians to get at "what is wrong with this country."
Another impotent effort to impose "a better way." They
should give up. Now is the time for all good christians to
keep their mouths shut.
"Virginity is sweeping the Nation." Virginity? It's a
nonsensical idea. Of questionable value at best. Who are
these hymen worshipers anyway? Who invented these concepts?
There is nothing so useless as an idea whose time is gone.
Except for disease, who cares what's been where in the past?
So what of virginity? I say fuck it. If you got it, lose
it. And don't look back.
"Virginity is sweeping the Nation." To arms! To arms! A
call to arms! Sound the alarm! The pinkcoats are coming!
One if you must, two if you can! Attack any (appropriate)
opening! Rise up! Down with hot pants! Ban the bra!
Power to the penis! Strike a blow at the sanctity of
marriage! Ask not what your cunt can do for you, ask what
you can do for your cunt! Fourscore! Fourscore! This week
I will fourscore! And give proof through the night!