Raise or No Raise  

truckerwidow 46F
43 posts
5/20/2006 5:29 pm

Last Read:
8/19/2006 11:30 pm

Raise or No Raise

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

1. I do physical labor.
2. I work at great depths.
3. I plunge head first into everything I do.
4. I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
5. I work in a damp environment.
6. I work in a dark area that has poor ventilation.
7. I work in high temperatures.
8. My work exposes me to diseases.


Dear Penis,

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you
have raised, the management denies your request for the following reasons:

1. You do not work 8 hours straight.
2. You WORK IN SHORT SPURTS AND fall asleep after EACH brief work period.
3. You do not always follow the orders of the management team.
4. You do not stay in your designated area, and are often seen visiting other locations.
5. You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.
6. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
7. You dont always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.
8. You will retire LONG before you are 65.
9. You are unable to work double shifts.
10. You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task.
11. And if that were not all, you have constantly been seen entering and exiting the workplace carrying two
suspicious-looking bags.

rm_CDRoss 34M
655 posts
5/30/2006 7:07 pm

Sounds like one of the guys at work... guess now it wouldn't be too far off to say he can be a bit of a dick sometimes?

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