This is Just Stupid.......Don't Even Come in Here!  

travelingintexas 41M
posts
9/19/2005 11:54 am
This is Just Stupid.......Don't Even Come in Here!

Background Music:
Pour Some Sugar on Me, Def Leppard


See The Contest Has Officially Begun. Luke… What a stupid name. And his contest, even stupider. I hate everyone today, especially Luke. What a vile man he is. Anyone in a bowtie needs to be taken out back for a good ole fashioned ass whooping. LOL (Dear friends at AdultFriendFinder this is a joke, well, sort of. It’s only a joke because that jerk is in BumF8ck, North Carolina.)

I stepped into my shower this morning with the water warm and inviting. I got all soaped up, nice and slippery, bunny visions in my head and dadgum it if that stupid bowtie didn’t pop up on my shoulder and say “Nope sorry, your contesting.” I shouted “I’ll show you contesting,” and turned too quickly, fell and broke my good stroke arm. Now I use both hands, but you gotta have the good stroke arm.

As I was laying there in the ER, thinking of the loss of my good stroke arm and all those lovely Bunny thoughts I couldn’t have, I had a thought, an Epiphany if you will. I was reminded of a blog I did a couple of weeks ago titled The Definition of Masturbation is What?????. It is in this post that I have written proof that half of the contestants are currently ineligible.

If you don’t want to read this post let me pull up a few snippets for proof.

mas•tur•ba•tion (mstr-bshn)
Excitation of one's own genital organs, usually to orgasm, by manual contact or means other than sexual intercourse.


sj365 at [blog sj365] had this tidbit to offer:

”This is all wrong on so many levels.
"...or means other than sexual intercourse."?
Does that mean every time my bits get tingly I'm masturbating?
If so then call me freaky girl, cuz I have masturbated while breast feeding my babies, in movie theaters, in the library, the grocery store (frozen food section, cute guy down the other end of the aisle...you figure it out), at work, on the bus...etc etc.

I wasnt aware I WAS masturbating ... Websters seems to think i was.”


sweetthang2877 at sweetthang2877

“I suppose under that definition I must be CONSTANTLY masturbating!!”

By their own admission, SJ and Sweets are walking orgasms and should be disqualified.I know for a fact Bunny is out. She told me so.

If Traveling ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy!


Sweetest_Sin_Jes 36F

9/19/2005 1:26 pm

Was "Pour Some Sugar On Me" really playing at Starbucks when you wrote this? Hmmmmmmm...lol!

Jess


barbiebunny 36F
5597 posts
9/19/2005 1:40 pm

Yup need to mail Luke
I fell asleep with a vibrator on my coochie..wore the batteries darn out...

Its good to be...ME


dano6332 56M

9/19/2005 2:19 pm

LOL Trav sorry your having a bad day. I guess I am one of those guys that masturbate every couple of minutes based on sj365's definition (well except for breatfeeding as I never tried nursing my kids).


rm_luke69iner 48M
3275 posts
9/19/2005 3:39 pm

Trav

I thought you'd be talking about me

The only thing i got for you is small talk and a big old can of whoop ass ... and Trav ... i'm all done with the small talk

glad to hear you're enjoying the contest

<<< insert eeevil laugh here >>>




S'io credesse che mia risposta fosse
A persona che mai tornasse al mondo,
Questa fiamma staria senza piu scosse.
Ma perciocche giammai di questo fondo
Non torno vivo alcun, s'i'odo il vero,
Senza tema d'infamia ti rispondo
.
~Dante~


rm_luke69iner 48M
3275 posts
9/19/2005 3:42 pm

Bunny i hope you were thinking of me and not Trav when you wore your batteries out


S'io credesse che mia risposta fosse
A persona che mai tornasse al mondo,
Questa fiamma staria senza piu scosse.
Ma perciocche giammai di questo fondo
Non torno vivo alcun, s'i'odo il vero,
Senza tema d'infamia ti rispondo
.
~Dante~


rm_bella_ 47F
4030 posts
9/19/2005 4:28 pm

Ok, I am in a straight jacket trying to keep my hands away from my kitten...I am already getting bitchy and I need a cigarette!


ThumbChickStool 33F

9/19/2005 4:51 pm

See? Good reason not to enter the damned contest. Look what's happening to all the contestants.

Kisses


frbnkslady 48F
6183 posts
9/19/2005 5:57 pm

I just wanna know if we have to be sneezing too???

T




rm_sj365 55F
2414 posts
9/19/2005 8:16 pm

"By their own admission, SJ and Sweets are walking orgasms and should be disqualified" I am so NOT disqualified.
walking orgasms? I havent walked since the contest started!! im still in!

SJ *crawling to the kitchen for a snack*


rm_luke69iner 48M
3275 posts
9/19/2005 9:36 pm

21 and a half hours and counting

at least two contestents are out

and i'm still master of my domain

an ewok huh ... well your a ... a ... you have big feet ... or at least one of them ... you no bow tie wearing big foot

Bella smoke one for me

Native what do you mean look what's happening to all the contestants ... we always act this way

SJ what happened to your confidence that you would win

Okay Trav you can have your post back now ... Bigfoot


S'io credesse che mia risposta fosse
A persona che mai tornasse al mondo,
Questa fiamma staria senza piu scosse.
Ma perciocche giammai di questo fondo
Non torno vivo alcun, s'i'odo il vero,
Senza tema d'infamia ti rispondo
.
~Dante~


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