OH MY GOD! That is so....not....Good!!!  

travelingintexas 41M
posts
9/30/2005 8:39 pm
OH MY GOD! That is so....not....Good!!!

Background Music:
Seinfeld Theme Song


Men… Close your ears. Ladies please retreat to my Entertainment room where we shall partake of a movie. No…. not THAT movie. That was in elementary school. This is for big girls. Make yourself comfortable. As always let the wine flow freely and smoke ‘em if ya got ‘em.

***Clicks Play on DVD***

Cue: Man going down on woman. Woman screaming and yelling like a banshee.

Cue: Man has sex with woman. Woman screaming and yelling like a freak.

***Clicks Pause Button and slaps screen with pointer***

What you have just seen ladies are examples of two liars. Otherwise known as fakers. Women that fake an Orgasm. Let’s talk openly and honestly. Many women, in their profiles, say no game players, liars or men that aren’t real. This, at times, doesn’t seem to carry over into the sexual arena where some women seem to have no problem faking an orgasm for their partner. To build ego. To get it over with. Or a myriad list of other excuses.

In my humble opinion this robs you and your partner of mutual satisfaction. The one being lied to is the fool. The one doing the lying doesn’t receive the fullness of sexual pleasure. I can hear the murmurs now. The angst and “how would you know anything” faces. It is ok. I am big boy I can handle it. However, hear me out.

Knuckledraggers lie, cheat and devise ways to seduce based on a false premise. This goes for both a male or female. The same is true for in the bedroom. True sexual satisfaction is based on mutual trust and communication. Being in fear of sharing with your partner your true needs and desires automatically exposes issues in the relationship. If you don’t feel comfortable saying “a little to the left” something is wrong. If you have the ability to say “That is great” when it isn’t you are not sharing intimacy, you are sharing in a farce.

We have a very romantic view of intimacy. It feels good, makes me feel pretty, builds me up or makes me feel secure. My personal belief is that true intimacy often forces discord in a relationship. A couple that says wait, let me tell you the truth, while embarrassing or painful, is actually creating intimacy in the relationship. Your reasoning for not telling your partner what you like in the bedroom; scared, embarrassed or worried about hurting their feelings, does not create intimacy or build up the relationship. It actually stunts the growth of your relationship. A deeper more satisfying sexual relationship is formed because you are not afraid of true intimacy.

What am I saying you ask? Don’t lie or try and save “feelings” by not sharing your desires. Your desires are just as important as his. If he is “doing it” wrong, then tell him. The majority of the time, he would want to know and will make the adjustments and your fear will be ungrounded. A man that won’t make the changes for your benefit is probably not worth the time and energy anyway. You deserve better.

He deserves better. People are individuals. They have different needs. The last woman I was with may have been unable to orgasm unless I picked up her legs and knocked her ankles together real hard. If I came into your bedroom and used that philosophy with you, I may end up with my forehead smashed instead and you might have sore ankles. If I am unaware of your personal needs and desires, I can’t adjust to your particular needs. You are not doing me any favors by not teaching me your personal desires.

I hear numerous women say “he sucked in bed.” I believe, in many instances, it is partially your fault. You didn’t teach him or show him what pleases you. The woman he was with before you, may have lost her mind in multiple orgasms because of the way he took you. Teaching your needs is your responsibility, not his fault.

If he is no good at oral, take the time to teach him. He will learn. If he hops on and immediately starts banging away, and that’s not what you want, stop him with your words and show him how you enjoy it. You have the control in most situations. Not using it cheats you out of a satisfactory sexual relationship. Most men wouldn’t mind being shown by you. You aren’t teaching them how all women want it. You are teaching them how you need it.

In closing, don't be the female Knuckledragger by refusing intimacy to your partner. Share your needs. Refuse the easy way out and teach him your desires. True intimacy is a scary place to be. However, the end results are very much worth the extra effort.


RailBaron2 54M

10/1/2005 5:55 am

EXCELLENT POST!- i'm in Full agreement. LADIES- Please pay attention to this


pussinboots4u 50M/47F

10/1/2005 6:23 am

Very good post. Inspiration for my next post.


rm_DaphneR 58F
7938 posts
10/1/2005 7:15 am

And if you happen to get that guy that shoots his load before you can even open your mouth to say "a liitle to the left", a polite "clean that mess up and get the hell off me" works nicely.

Have tongue, will use it. Repeatedly.


dano6332 56M

10/1/2005 7:26 am

AMEN BROTHER............ Anything else is just bullshit and moves me away.
Thanks for some great words of wisdom.


gcastle2_1 59M
33 posts
10/1/2005 8:50 am

I always try and ensure my partner has the best possible orgasm I can help her have. Her satisfaction is what is important.


rm_luke69iner 48M
3275 posts
10/1/2005 11:22 am

well said Trav


S'io credesse che mia risposta fosse
A persona che mai tornasse al mondo,
Questa fiamma staria senza piu scosse.
Ma perciocche giammai di questo fondo
Non torno vivo alcun, s'i'odo il vero,
Senza tema d'infamia ti rispondo
.
~Dante~


dawndirtymind 42F
370 posts
10/1/2005 12:20 pm

Bravo!
Faking is something I've never understood and it's essentially just lying to both the other person and yourself and personally have never done it and never will.
There are times when an orgasm is just not going to happen no matter if everything is being done right, but that's no reason to fake. Admitting its not going to happen and focusing on the others' pleasure can be satisfying as well. The next time might be even better.


frbnkslady 48F
6183 posts
10/1/2005 3:41 pm

, I let them know when I cum, but I have only orgasmeed a few times.. and they KNEW it.. no faking here. Feel sad for
those who do. They truely miss out.. T

T




Sweetest_Sin_Jes 36F

10/1/2005 7:29 pm

How DARE (oh baby) people FAKE like that (give it to me hard baby). I mean, (yeah yeah, right there) what goes through the mind of people (I'm gonna cum) these days? (OHHHHHHHH) I have never seen (OH YEAHHHHHHHH!) such a thing (SCREAMMMMMMM) in my life! Hmmmmmph! (Oh baby, you're the best) Some people!

hehe

Jess


DefiniteTrouble 50F

10/1/2005 8:12 pm

lmfao Daphne.

Great post bro. If you aren't honest with your partner regarding your wants and deires, then a true level of intimacy can't be established. Without intimacy, what's the point?


LustGoddess2469 50F  
2453 posts
10/2/2005 9:58 pm

Yes, honesty is a VERY important thing. Too bad some people don't take their own advice.

Lusty


rm_cockmerollme 45F
1223 posts
11/5/2005 4:39 pm

Sometimes a bad lay is just that...bad timing, bad co ordination, bad foot odor...but that is what your 20's are about, faking it, faking almost everything...now, if can't coach the good sir into producing something to make me growl, I have no shame in whipping out the d cell demon and making it happen for us. I am in control of my own orgasims. What? I'm gonna leave it up to a guy who can't go to the DMV successfully? White person, pleeeaasseee.

LET'S GO METS!!!


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