Its Simple Really... Part A Goes in Part B  

travelingintexas 41M
posts
8/2/2006 3:14 pm
Its Simple Really... Part A Goes in Part B

Condemnation…

Do you do that?

Do you get that?

Do you give that?

Funny… Looking back on the last year and then farther into the last 10 years, I must admit, condemnation was a major part of my daily life. From what you may ask? Primarily myself.

The lies, deceit, burden, shame, anger, bitterness and loss of hope were self driven. A once happy man became hurt and despondent not through the actions of others, surprisingly, but through the actions and thoughts of himself.

Funny that power eh? Funny the strength our very minds have to lock and chain us down into the dungeon of lost hope. Funny how we won’t give an inch to others but heaven forbid we break easily when the lies of our minds come upon us. Funny how we desperately seek love in both the right and wrong places but can’t love ourselves.

Why?

Why do we systematically tear ourselves down over things we couldn’t give a rats ass about with other people. It is odd. Typically, I would write something like this when I am dealing with a certain issue or in the midst of self condemnation. However, I write today without being in the middle of it. I don’t know why or to what purpose. I just know it was on my heart to discuss.

“When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.” ‒ Alexander Graham Bell

"Forget regret, or life is yours to miss." ‒ Jonathan Larson

"Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable." ‒ Sydney Harris

Funny that last quote huh?

We don’t move forward we spend so much time looking back. Wonder if that’s how the Thinking Man turned to stone? Perhaps he sat there so long thinking about what could have been, should have been, might have been or could occur, he became nothing at all.


TravelinsAuntPat 50F

8/2/2006 4:46 pm

UM NO DEAR LET AUNTIE PAT HELP YOU OUT WITH THE HISTORY OF THE THINKING MAN.

SEE THE THINKING MAN TURNED TO STONE NOT BECAUSE HE WAS THINKING BUT BECAUSE HE WAS ON THE POT AND HE WAS CONSTIPATED. SEE FOR THE THINKING MAN TO TURN TO STONE BY THINKING HE WOULD HAVE TO HAVE WHAT IS CALLED A THOUGHT PROCESS. NOW BY AND LARGE WE KNOW THAT MEN DO NOT THINK.... IT IS NOT IN THEIR NATURE.... THEY JUST ACT... MOSTLY ON IMPULSE IF THEY EVEN HAVE A PULSE AT ALL.

I LOVE YA BUT I HAD TO SET THE RECORD STRAIGHT.......

ARE YA CONSTIPATED TODAY?
LOVE,
AUNTIE PAT

OH AND P.S. YOUR RIGHT ABOUT TRYING TO GO THROUGH THE NEW DOOR CAUSE USUALLY MY ASS GOT CAUGHT IN THE CLOSED DOOR AND WHEN I FINALLY OPENED MY EYES TO WALK THROUGH THE NEW DOOR I RAN INTO THE NEW DOOR FACE FIRST. THAT IS BECAUSE I TOOK SO LONG GETTING THERE GOD CLOSED THAT ONE TOO. SO I HAD TO LEARN TO CRAWL THROUGH THE WINDOWS.


rm_1hotwahine 63F
21091 posts
8/2/2006 5:21 pm

Damn...

Those quotes? They made me smile with acknowledgement and recognition of the meaning. If anyone else has that response, then yea for all of us cause it means we're on the "life is here right now" side of what they mean.

Had I read them last week or last year or next Thursday, maybe not. But they hit me on a good day. And inspires me to make it so tomorrow, as well.

Clarity comes at us at the oddest times and directions, huh?

(confirms original thoughts re: well-adjusted comment)

Yeah, I'm still [blog 1hotwahine]


ella1966 50F
1528 posts
8/2/2006 5:31 pm

Interesting Trav, how I find myself being mirrored almost exactly in your blog...if you would care to stoop or have the time to read it, you may well glean some insight as to why I think this...but a very interesting post...I think it is just a personality stereotype, some people have no capacity for self-reflection...perhaps we were not parented correctly and thus "don't have tickets on ourselves" (as we say in Oz), we were not given enough strokes, we were heavily criticised as children, and so we have taken all this onboard...interesting...the world of psychology and personality, isn't it???

regards

ella


rm_sj365 55F
2414 posts
8/2/2006 5:36 pm

*smiles*
I saw some dishes at Target the other day...pretty bright colors, sparklin' new indestructible correll stuff.

I hate them kinda dishes.

But gawd i do love me some old, cracked pottery.


LadytoPleaseYou 64F
5447 posts
8/2/2006 7:27 pm

I think that sometimes we all think too much.

PENIS CHARMING....where are you?


TzarsAmuseChant 41M
2854 posts
8/2/2006 8:25 pm

woulda coulda shoulda... you dida! Your lies are like bananas: they come in big yellow bunches! - Leslie Nielsen Wrongfully Accused


nebraskabitch66 50F
8 posts
8/2/2006 9:47 pm

Spent about the last 2 hours reading your blogs and all I can say is - your poor fucking ex-wife. I hope she got a hell of a settlement and gets a healthy check each month. Yes I am a bitch however I am not trying to be one here - just feel sorry for her as I have been there and it doesn't feel good. SELF ESTEEM - what the hell is that - my husband took it away from me.


rm_DaphneR 58F
7938 posts
8/2/2006 11:07 pm

Ooooo...Nebraskabitch spent a whole 2 hours reading your blog and feels that she can go ahead and judge you and your "poor fucking ex-wife". Niiiiiiiiiccccee. SHe said she wasn't trying to be a bitch. I am. Step aside brat, it's been a while since I've done that.

NB, in 2 hours you haven't even scratched the surface of what this man was and is or what he and his ex (calling her a fucking ex is very disrespectful, I truly doubt you feel sorry for her or anyone else other than yourself) have been through. You obviously don't understand anything about their situation other than he cheated so you are passing judgement. You say you husband took away your self-esteem. YOU allowed that. Stop being a victim and blaming everyone else for your misfortunes. You are an adult, you are responsible for your life. Take charge of it. That's what Trav has done. It took him a while to get things straight with a lot of effort on his part and a lot of support from friends. If you want to have an informed opinion on this blog I suggest you allow yourself at least 2 days to read his entire blog, then maybe your words might mean something, rather than appearing as simply a cheap shot because he's a man that has admitted to cheating.

If you don't want to spend the time reading, I suggest you go back and play in your corn field.


Have tongue, will use it. Repeatedly.


cookiequeen1000 53F

8/3/2006 4:23 am

Woohoo DaphneR!! I agree.

Most people spend so much of their lives being their own worst judge...very depressing and limiting. They do what they know, what they're taught. That never worked for me and I finally decided to turn the "what if" game around to the positive side and WOW has it changed the way I look at/feel/see everything. Never depressing and never limiting. Its so much more fun and productive to be your own personal cheerleader.

Worry is a debt we pay on a bill we might not even owe - my Dad (don't know where he got the quote, but its become family mantra).


ella1966 50F
1528 posts
8/3/2006 6:05 am

    Quoting cookiequeen1000:
    Woohoo DaphneR!! I agree.

    Most people spend so much of their lives being their own worst judge...very depressing and limiting. They do what they know, what they're taught. That never worked for me and I finally decided to turn the "what if" game around to the positive side and WOW has it changed the way I look at/feel/see everything. Never depressing and never limiting. Its so much more fun and productive to be your own personal cheerleader.

    Worry is a debt we pay on a bill we might not even owe - my Dad (don't know where he got the quote, but its become family mantra).
cookie queen and daphne, girls please come over to Oz and help me, I don't think I could pay any enough for that kinda advice and support...by the way Trav, everyone who has read my blog in depth and used to comment on it appear to have done a piss bolt from disgust at me, or probably from reflecting themselves in it, so at least you have readers left and therefore....mine have probably judged mine, and vomited on it...and I am serious about this, btw!


rm_goddess1946 106F
13518 posts
8/3/2006 10:58 am

don't give it ..
don't get it...
prefer to spend life otherwise
since I've learned it is just too
short for condemning energy to reign for long...


Just a little food for thought.............
If you really want to be happy, nobody can stop you...
{=}


rm_1hotwahine 63F
21091 posts
8/3/2006 12:31 pm

<--savoring another "Daph Moment"

Yeah, I'm still [blog 1hotwahine]


MOfunNOWWOW 55F

8/3/2006 6:17 pm

First Go Daph
Second goddess you took the words right out of my mouth!


MOMO
just a squirrel trying to get a nut


TheRealThing655 48F
9558 posts
8/3/2006 11:06 pm

This was a great post, and the quotes are just so true...I'm keeping them.
And I am shocked at the comment above but love Daphne's response.
As someone who has had similar issues in my marriage, all I can say is you can never judge anyone until you walk in their shoes..and I have always respected your honesty on your Blog as well as the humor.


EyeCandy33333 44F
761 posts
8/4/2006 12:30 am

Well-the whole idea-if you do shit in life-u risk-if u love u risk. If you don't do shit-you get impacted-u do nothing-you don't feel love.
Now-I read about the 2 hour reading material-jesus christ-eveidently you don't get Trav-this man has grown so much-"has picked himself up and got back in the race"-shit-we all have made mistakes-but don't hang him on a cross for it. He paid dearly for it and may I add he is an extremely gifted writer-one of the most interesting one's you will read on here.
A good man-what is the definition of that-I think Trav is the summation of that-gifted, talented,intelligent,witty,realizes and admits his failings(but you can't bury yourself in it anymore), loves his kids, and wants to love and find the right relationship --and he's tall(smilin)--sooooo much talent!
He is ready for and deserves this time of healing-anyone would-he is not just words on a page but a real live person with a loving soul. Now, if you go back,wipe,flush the toilet, take your computer "to the light"-lol-and reread more in depth-enjoy his humor-his intelligence, his sincerity,honesty,yes his depression(won't enjoy that but-he has been thru it all), and amazingly he comes out retaining this humor, wit, and still hangs out in low places with us?
Trav is a good man.


EyeCandy33333 44F
761 posts
8/4/2006 10:42 am

well beetlejuice-didn't mean to stop the flow of conversation-lol!emmm #969 I have to put-nice number


rm_corezon 53F
3376 posts
8/5/2006 6:17 am

<------savoring another Wahine moment

since I just saw the pic with the typist sitting on the shitter with her labtop, lol, good answer Trav


rm_1hotwahine 63F
21091 posts
8/5/2006 11:11 pm

    Quoting rm_corezon:
    <------savoring another Wahine moment

    since I just saw the pic with the typist sitting on the shitter with her labtop, lol, good answer Trav
<---savoring another Corezon moment.

Sorry. Couldn't resist.

Yeah, I'm still [blog 1hotwahine]


kyplowboy22 61M

8/7/2006 3:49 am

Anything can be thought to death, even the thinker. People have a way of getting a notion in their heads, think about it, realize it isn't what they want it to be, know deep down that it can't ever be but insist on thinking of ways for it to be. I'm not talking about innovative, problem solving type thinking here, I'm talking about the 'thinking a horse into a mule' kinda stuff. Thinking is fine and dandy, but it don't mean scratch if it never gets applied. Sooner or later, you have to do something; lead, follow or get the hell out of the way. Later

kpb

PS: Don't know what that NB girl was thinkin'. Reckon she just wanted a pair of Texas balls in her collection. Everthings bigger in Texas, you know. lol


TravelinsAuntPat 50F

8/8/2006 12:56 am

    Quoting nebraskabitch66:
    Spent about the last 2 hours reading your blogs and all I can say is - your poor fucking ex-wife. I hope she got a hell of a settlement and gets a healthy check each month. Yes I am a bitch however I am not trying to be one here - just feel sorry for her as I have been there and it doesn't feel good. SELF ESTEEM - what the hell is that - my husband took it away from me.

UM LET AUNT PAT SUM THIS UP FOR YOU IN A FEW SIMPLE WORDS.

BITCH YOU DO NOT KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOU ARE EVEN TALKING ABOUT. 7 POSTS I SEE BY YOUR BLOG A NEWBIE THAT WANTS TO COME UP IN HERE AND AFTER TWO HOURS YOU WANNA BEGIN TO THINK YOU REMOTELY CAN JUDGE A PERSON. WHO THE HELL ARE YOU TO JUDGE ANYONE. DID I MISS THE MEMO THAT GOD DIED AND HE LEFT YOU IN CHARGE?????

FOR ONE THING YOU ARE A WEAK BITTER WOMAN WHICH IS VERY UNATTRACTIVE TRAIT. I CAN TELL THAT YOU ARE WEAK BECAUSE OF ONE SENTENCE YOU LEFT SAYING "YOUR HUSBAND STOLE YOUR SELF ESTEEM." YOU HAVE TO GIVE THAT AWAY. WHAT DID THE GUY SNEAK UP ON YOU IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND STEAL IT OUT OF YOUR BACK POCKET. YOU COULD HAVE WALKED OUT THE DOOR ANYTIME YOU PLEASED AND KEPT YOUR SELF ESTEEM IN TACT. FACT IS YOU WERE WEAK AND JUST LIKE MOST EVERYONE ELSE ON EARTH YOU STAYED IN A BAD SITUATION AND NOW YOU WANT TO BLAME SOMEONE ELSE.

LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING ABOUT MY NEPHEW. THERE IS NO WAY YOU CAN COME IN HERE AND READ 2 HOURS WORTH OF HIS BLOGS AND EVER BEGIN TO THINK ABOUT MAKING A JUDGMENT ON HIM. PLUS WHERE THE FUCK DO YOU EVER GET OFF DISRESPECTING HIS EX-WIFE BY USING THAT KIND OF LANGUAGE WHERE SHE IS CONCERNED. AS MUCH AS I LOVE HER I CAN SAY FOR A FACT SHE IS NO ANGEL. WHO IS? LAST TIME I LOOKED IT TOOK 2 TO TANGO.

NOW LETS GET TO YOUR TERM SETTLEMENT. I TAKE IT YOUR THE KIND OF AMBULANCE, PARKED CAR CHASING, IDIOT THAT THE WORLD IS FULL OF. THINKING OH POOR PITIFUL ME THE WORLD OWES ME SOMETHING. YOU NEED TO FIND A SUPPORT GROUP FOR THE WOUNDED AND BITTER EX-WIFE'S OF NEBRASKA.

SO BITCH STEP OFF AND DON'T TALK ABOUT SOMETHING YOU DON'T KNOW. ALL I KNOW IS FOR ONE I WISHED LIKE I HELL YOU LIVED IN TEXAS BECAUSE I WOULD GLADLY PAY THE HIGH PRICE OF GAS TO DRIVE FROM ONE END OF TEXAS TO OTHER END TO KICK YOUR ASS FOR TALKING ABOUT TRAVEL OR HIS EX-WIFE THAT WAY. YOU CAN TELL YOU WERE NOT RAISED WITH ANY MANORS. GO FIGURE A PRODUCT OF YANKEE PARENTS. ( SORRY TO THOSE OF YOU ON HERE WHO I AM FRIENDS WITH THAT ARE YANKEE BUT AT LEAST YOU WERE RAISED WITH MANNERS).

SO LET ME LEAVE YOU WITH ONE MORE THING TRAVELING HAS MORE INTEGRITY IN HIS LITTLE FINGER THEN YOU WILL EVER HAVE IN YOUR WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE. PROOF IS BECAUSE HE HAS LAID IT ALL OUT ON THE LINE AND HE WAS MAN ENOUGH TO COME FORTH BARE HIS SOUL AND SHARE HIS FEELINGS AND HIS PAST IN ORDER TO HELP OTHER PEOPLE. PLUS HE CAME FORTH AND WAS HONEST WITH IS EX AND HIS FAMILY. WHICH IS MORE THAN I AM SURE YOU WILL EVER BE ABLE TO DO OR SAY FOR YOURSELF. WHICH IS ONLY APPARENT THAT YOU CANNOT EVEN BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF BECAUSE YOUR TO BUSY BLAMING YOUR EX FOR ALLOWING YOURSELF TO BECOME A VICTIM!!!!!!!!!

SO GET UP OUT OF YOUR VICTIM ROLE, FIND A BACK BONE, QUIT BEING SO BITTER AND STEP OFF WHERE MY NEPHEW IS CONCERNED.

TEXAS REGARDS (MEANING THE ONE FINGER SALUTE)
AUNTIE PAT


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