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The Journey Begins..
The Journey Begins..
My First Post.
"46 Year old DWM living in Central NJ, Looking for new experiences"
I've been married for the past 20 years and my ex and I have grown in different directions, work, play, emotional needs have all diverged and as we did not have any children, we decided to follow our own now distinct paths in life (now divorced). I have never been much into going to clubs or bars to meet partners and now find it to be even harder as my only particular reason for doing so is to satisfy my physical sexual desires. Which only tie into my emotional needs at the point of wanting to provide a pleasurable experience for my "Partner". I don't feel that I am ready to enter into a LTR just yet.
Many of the women's profiles I have viewed and read, have attributes listed that they wish to have their perspective partners meet. Many of them I don't meet, Tall, Dark, Handsome, Well Endowed, Six Pack Abs, "I would like to get to know you and perhaps have a LTR". I must admit that I also have some desired attributes in the "Partner" that I am looking for, 25 - 55 years old (female, couple, group) H/W proportionate body, the emotional and intellectual maturity to understand the need for "recreational sex - mutual satisfaction" without the need for a relationship outside of sex. I'm certain that I am most likely in the majority of the men on this site, and as such, the women are inundated with messages to the effect of "Wanna Fuck?" and "For a good time, call me" as some of the ladies profiles actually state that requests like these or messages with only cock shots will be summarily deleted.
My profile has both a regular profile picture which shows my face and a nude picture to show "Me". In visiting other profiles, my interest is sometimes sparked by the headline, sometimes their location, and many times by their picture. I am somewhat interested in the attractiveness quotient of who I'd like to have sex with. So for those reasons I included both types of photos. So now with some of my background out of the way, here is the reason for my beginning a Blog.
I've been a member on AdultFriendFinder now since the beginning of April 2006. I signed up as a paid member so that others would know that I was "for real" about wanting to meet others and not just some come on to a commercial site. But perhaps I've been TOO nice and not specific enough in my profile about why I'm here. I've had about 40 views of my profile (not including an unknown number of "Hidden" views) and of those only about 8 have come close to matching any one of my settings, and they all were people that I had first previously viewed. Of the some 30 messages I've sent, only 5 people have messaged back, and of those 3 were commercial invitations to contact them outside of AdultFriendFinder. I've added perhaps 100 profiles (of people I found to be interesting) to my Hotlist, but over time about 30 of them have (or have had) their profile removed, and about 30 have turned off their profile for their own reasons. And as I mentioned before, many have not responded to my initial contacts.
IS IT ME? Am I just too nice? Are women looking for more of a "Bad Boy"? Do I need to be more "In your face" about how I want to Fuck you in all of your holes with my raging hard on until you beg me to stop and then cum all over your face, tits, and ass to show you who's boss? Should I put my cock picture up front to perhaps spark some interest? Perhaps I'm on the wrong site, although the site lists it's self as the "World's largest sex and swinger personals community". Maybe I need to relax some of my desire for a partner who isn't shorter and outweighs me, but does want to screw everything in sight. On the other hand is it possible that women, couples, groups, don't normally initiate contact with men?
So many questions so few answers. Such is the world we live in. I suppose that I may be rushing the whole process of finding someone to have sex with and I simply need to give it some more time, but damn, I'd like to get laid sooner than later. I certainly don't want to appear to be a pest by sending multiple "why haven't you written me back" messages. And I don't send little "Wanna Fuck" type messages either. So here I sit trying to make some sense of my situation and hoping that some of the other "Real" members on this site may have some answers or some insight to my questions and concerns.
I'd love to hear what you have to say.