shattered bliss........  

tattooedartist 44M
459 posts
6/6/2005 7:53 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

shattered bliss........

Forgive me, it is my anger that rages today. I have recieved a cruel blow in self-righteous judgement and my heart is bleeding......Has anyone in here ever had someone in their lives, friend, family, coworker find them on here and judge them? TO this I say.....

To: What was a friend......

You spit and you hiss and i accept your cruel blows

you judge and you claw but at what you dont know

you yell and you scream and you execute your free will

you know nothing of my heart as you close in for the kill

You raise your hands and you preach as if you have nothing to fear

you dance with my soul as you wring out my tears

You speak of choices and fate as if youve ever had the strength to live

You preach of old fashioned values and honor, as if youve got something left to give

I sit and I listen becasue what more can I say

You judged me in ignorance, youve betrayed me this day

I stand and I bow because there is nothing else to do

because I wish i could have shown you what it is, that you already wish you knew.

I am truly sorry you have judged me. I am sorry you havent the stength to seek answers or to even ask the questions in the first place. I am sorry you would overlook the friend that I have been and the man that I am over something you dont understand. BUT mostly I am sorry you will live out your life oblivious to the will of your heart, the sanctity of your desires and the beauty that lives in the heart of passion. I am sorry something so meaningful could be put aside, so easily. I have loved you as a man of honor. I have bled for you and cried with you.

My heart is broken but I will mend. My tears will flow but soon they will end. I have the heart of a gladiator and I will rise above this and love you anyway, as it is my priveledge to do. Someday you will understand.....Oh I hope for your sake, you do.

With a clinched fist and a wounded knee, I concede.



pussnboots694 73M/78F

6/6/2005 5:32 pm

It seems like turmoil is all around us..
I am sorry you are hurting.
I do not know the circumstances of this but, sometimes people just grow apart, things never stay the same in this forever changing world, and as cruel as it may feel to you, everything happens for a reason, it forces us to change to be strong, when we don't feel like it.
It can hit us in the stomach and wind us when we are not expecting it. our first reaction is always anger, followed by hurt and then the fear of change...
you have a heart of gold and I know you will love this person no matter what, just because we always love the people who touch our lives, that is why it hurts us so.
It is a cruel punch in the guts when we realize we really do not know the person at all, but then people change, I am not the way I was last year, or yesterday for that matter, we all change everyday, in acceptance we must give people their freedom to make their own choices, so you can make yours...wisdom I now live my life by.
Be angry when you need to be, cry when you need to be, when your up live it, when your down live it things will level off and the sun will shine again, and know that you are thought of in the lives of many..
If you need to talk, you know where to find me
Kisses and warm hugs

tattooedartist 44M

6/6/2005 8:59 pm

The tears have stopped and they were metaphorical anyway.....a vast representation of what for, there are no words. I will not bleed for injustice or give the devil his due....what they want from me they must take....if they can. Thank you for your kind words and support, when I think I have been drawn into, you take me farther.

rm_txrose4uNTX 57F
3289 posts
6/7/2005 5:55 am

Ok, if they are going to be soooooo judgemental, why are they on this site in the first place. Of all places to be, this is not a place to be judgemental -- and, certainly one of the reasons why I enjoy this site so much and the AdultFriendFinder men I have met through this site....

tattooedartist 44M

6/7/2005 9:11 am

I agree with you Tx, some things I will never understand. My family is a bit high and mighty ( i like those words today)and some of the people who have crowded me over the years, although I love them dearly just will not see some things for the beauty that they are....I am truly the proverbial black sheep and some things, never change. I have licked my wounds which wsa both painful and pleasurable and chose to stand tall, with my head held high, as it is in my nature to do. Love is a strong beast and will not be set aside so easily and some things are meant for tomorrow, not today. I am a patient man and loved this man as a brother and friend I did.....I will smile upon his face and wait fro the hands of father time to lead him through to a better place....thats all I can do.

You are very dear to me and I thank you from the bottom of a deep heart for who you are, I value you greatly.


rm_bella_ 47F
4030 posts
7/14/2005 6:24 pm

Judgement comes from all, even others on this site never mind a friend. It is human nature, it is sad...but it is human nature.

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