being selfish and hiding  

taodoug65 51M
301 posts
6/21/2005 10:45 pm

Last Read:
12/12/2009 7:31 am

being selfish and hiding


I have come to the conclusion - and realization. that I am glad to be able to hide behind a computer and to o type. Because it allows me just a tiny bit of dignity. As I can't stop. (Course alcohol has not helped at all this time). I walked back and forth to the lake. Bout 7 times today.only cause i forgot to get gas for the golf cart twice so far. this last time i decided wtf. just leave it there. Yah just gotta love dogs. So far they are keeping me together. Best thing a person could ever have in their life.. A dog.. they make even the pain on your worst day, not a whole lot better. But tolerable. Awana - she is my oldest Pitbull. She has kept her head on me all night. SHew is too human today. I wish at one time tonight I had my video camera set up.
everytime my eye's started to well up when i recieved the news of my friend. Ahhh gdodamn -- I just let go. Here comes Awana running into the house plops down. On my lap. And starts howling. Ahhhj damn dog.. Yesterday she wouldn't let me sleep in peace. Now I can't even cry with out her trying to be funny. By crying with me. Not more the 10 seconds had past. all 3 were howlin. I guess they were showing how rediculous I looked.
Though their humorous howling helps for a moment.. The selfish person I am. Still is mad at her.

sexyeyes375 47F

6/22/2005 1:25 am

this is so personal and raw....it filled my heart

know that you are thought of often by many here...


taodoug65 51M
262 posts
6/22/2005 10:46 am

thank you


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