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Anger - Seems A good Feeling
Anger - Seems A good Feeling
Yah know. I set up the blog about asianlady4love giving up.
Couple weeks ago I wrote how angry I was that a very dear friend gave up fighting with her cancer. And past away.
I thanked all of you sincerely, from the bottom of my heart for bieng here for me. And giving me that aged old "Things happen for a reason."
Then I sat, went out for a walk, since I put my lake house on the selling block and moved back to Irving. I am no back to going for long walks instead of hanging out by the lake.
I came to the conclusion - that if two people I respected as friends (although one for only a very short time) can walk away from what they enjoy. AKA - throw in the towel and quit..
Why should I have to go on doing as they told me. "Keep your chin up. Your doing fine Douglas." It sounds stupid to me to follow those guides. When lets see..
My wife gave up -- cause I now pay for what the military put me through with nightmares.
The one person that truly new me and didn't run away from me - gave up the fight for her own life. And let the cancer take her away from me.
asianladfy4love - because she felt that some one wrote wrongly, And then another broke her heart - she gave up doing what she enjoyed.
Then this means - what they say was wrong. It was all lies... Once again.. They all believed in saying that they cared.. That they would be here.. That if you put your faith where it should be... You will be strong. And those that say they care will not run away...
They lied.. All of what people say about caring and truth. Is away to make themselves free of anything that may go wrong.. It is away of pleasing there own inner peace of mind.. I know now why my younger brother said to me once " People say I Love You as easy as MCDonald's make a hamburger. It is routine and that I read to deeply."
That is okay with me. Because now I give up. I am going to not give up AdultFriendFinder for as long as I can, But I am going to do as Tanya did.. Quit taking my meds.. Do like my ex - did and run away from that which a care --- and those that stopped chatting do what they did-- eventually understand i am not on the right side of the grass..
Why not.. When you finally admit that what people say is just to be polite is why they say it. giving up is easier.. I am going to walk some more now..
7/5/2005 5:46 pm
What is your intent by refusing your meds? What will you gain?|
7/6/2005 2:42 pm
Kieth - Nothing. actually it will put me in the hospital as it did Tanya. |
But I will be honest Keith it was more of a statement to show how stupid it is to just give up. Simply because you hurt inside.
7/6/2005 3:52 pm
tao your a new friend to me an i want you to stick around so i can learn from you..if you chose not to take your meds then so be it the choice is yours but the choice to stand by you is ours to make and i think i chose to stand by you for a very long time|