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He's gone again...
He's gone again...
I just want to scream and cry. Obviously not a good idea since I'm still trying to recover from the walking crud I have. The house is too quiet, too empty. I ache from the pit of my stomach all through my chest. Last night at the M&G was hard hearing everyone asking d_c_guy when he was leaving. Earlier that evening at dinner I looked over at him and it was like getting slammed with this overwhelming feeling that we had only a little over 12 hours left together. After we left the M&G we were going to go to Bricktown 54 but headed straight home instead. It was time to wind down the week. Time to be alone. I broke down and cried. I hate that I did it because I know it hurts him. I just wish that one day we wouldn't have to do this once a month thing anymore. It's like having a part of me ripped away every time.
The M&G was a lot of fun last night seeing some old faces and meeting new. It's always nice to walk into a room and see people's eyes light up when you walk into the room. I know I was reflecting that same light back last night. I admit to being a shameless flirt last night lol I'm sure I said lots of jaw dropping things to shock folks LOL It's like I was telling a few of you last night, you can't say anything around me that I can turn into anything remotely sexual or I just run with it. I'm still laughing about from when I was over by the pool tables and someone (forgive me I can't remember your name or your screen name!) asked me "Can I shoot here?" I said "As long as you wear a condom I don't care where you shoot". That's as bad as when d_c_guy and I got there last night and the ballgame was on the radio. He was helping me put my...body chain I guess you'd call it...on and the announcer was talking about rubber and getting bent over and well that just sent me into a fit of giggles. I'm so gutter minded
Speaking of the chain I had on, wow I didn't expect to get so many compliments on it. Last Monday d_c_guy and I were on our own, lil man was at daycare. So we went shopping. We went into Frederick's and just walked around. I know he had looked at the chain and then we left, walked around some more and he asked me if I would wear something like that. The moment I looked at him I knew that yes I would so we went back in the store and I tried it on. Then came home and modeled it LOL I wish I'd had it the night of PP but I'm glad I was able to wear it last night. A word of warning though. If you leave it on while...*ahem* "frolicking"...you will probably get "chain burn" LOL
After leaving the M&G I felt like I was just floating the whole way home. I'd had a wonderful date with an amazing man, had a whole lot of wonderful laughs, conversations, hugs and kisses from a room full of great people.
There's a part of me that can't wait to pick up Austin but at the same time I'm enjoying the down time right now. I need this "me" time before I can return to being mom again.
Luckily I get "me" time next weekend. Austin's dad is picking him up Friday night and I get him back sometime on Sunday. So either I'll be spending it recovering in bed that weekend from the remainder of my "crud" or I'm going to party til I drop. Thankfully I get paid Friday too so I might treat myself to a movie. I've been wanting to see The Devil Wears Prada since I read the book.
We saw Pirates of the Caribbean yesterday. It was REALLY good! Stay til after the credits. It's nothing major, but it's cute I'm upset about one of the previews they showed for the film Transformers (yes the toys you played with as a kid). The darn movie isn't coming out til July 4th of NEXT YEAR!! Why show a preview that far in advance??? Grrph. Oh and I'm excited because Eragon (yes same as the book) will be coming out. So I guess I'll hold off on reading the book til after I see the film. I'm usually disappointed with a movie if I read the book first.
Sun is finally starting to come out here. I need to get a broom so I can sweep off the back porch so Austin can go out there with his sidewalk chalk I bought him. There's a caterpillar crawling on my screen. One of those orange fuzzy ones.
When I sat down here to blog Tipper came over and sat next to me and then put his paw on me and stared up at me as if to say "Mom don't be sad I'm here" and then decided it was snack time and proceeded to try and suck my finger lol That's how we all fell asleep last night. d_c_guy spooning me, and me spooning Tipper while he had a "finger sandwich".
I REALLY want a cup of Starbucks White Chocolate Mocha right now. But between the Claritin-D and the fact I can't afford one well that kind of kills that LOL
Oh and we went to the baseball game Friday night. I had a lot of fun. Ok the game to me was boring. I expected more excitement. But it was nice getting to take Austin to a game for the first time and getting to watch a game with d_c_guy was a treat since it's something we've talked about doing together for a while now. I'm due to fly up to see him for Labor Day weekend and we're going to a Nationals game.
He's doing a charity AIDS ride this weekend coming up. He even passed his fundraising goal. I'm so proud of him He's an amazing person in many ways.
I want to give a big THANK YOU and a huge *HUG* to Cat(Kat? eep I forget your ID, all I could hear was the simply part lol) for the wonderful compliment you gave us. I almost broke down right there but didn't want to embarrass myself *blush* It's nice that someone else sees that besides me.
Going to check the boards and then go pick up mini me from his grandmas
Have a wonderful day everyone *hugs*
7/10/2006 6:54 am
Bzzy bzzy grrl!|
Sounds like you are doing alright Vicki, its kinda fun living your life through your blogs!
Almost made it to the M&G but life got in the way again - so you will have to elaborate on what this "Chain" is/was for me!
I plan on seeing Pirates soon - but the Transformers is for next year? My son may be too old to want to see it by then! (I have to note that the original Ice Age trailer was out TWO YEARS before the movie came out!)
And Eragon - should be great - I read the book a while back and really enjoyed it - make sure you go out and get the double pack of Eragon and Eldest together - although the third one should be out.. (Well sometime!)
Anyway, hope your day goes well!
7/10/2006 2:46 pm
Sounds like a bit of a roller coaster ride for you the last couple of days. I think that you are a strong person being able to handle the separations. When I had a job where I travelled alot, for long periods, it was not much fun to leave my family. The reunion was always fantastic, but there was like you said, kind of the dread of having to leave again. |
Hopefully the crud will clear up before it impacts your weekend. It sounds like you really need that time for yourself.
Sometimes, when things get hectic, at the first available opportunity I will just pack a bag, get in the truck and head for the mountains. I think that it is in my blood. It seems to clear the mind and spirit of part of the societal crud that accumulates. I'm fortunate to be in a position to be able to do that. I hate doing it alone, though...
My best friend just became a grandmother for the first time. She is so happy and glowing. I am so happy that everything was OK and the baby is just a beautiful little girl. After so many years not having held a newborn, it was such a mind boggling, heart rendering experience. It just brings everything back into perspective. Hopefully I will get to see the little one grow(unless they move or something). The parents are very young...
Well, this news will probably be in my blog...but I doubt if it gets much reading. Honestly didn't mean to hijack your blog, LOL. This time I hope it is Ok to share the happy event with the rest of the gang.
Feel better soon!
7/10/2006 4:34 pm
CONGRAD'S! You are now on the 'front-page' - good on ya' sweetie!|