This has really scared me  

starlight_runner 39F
817 posts
5/18/2006 10:33 am

Last Read:
7/6/2006 4:54 pm

This has really scared me

I was reading a profile today checking out potential playmates when I read this :

"we like full unprotected sex with strangers ,dressed up ,long and passionate with lots of lesbian and some gay sex as well ,it doesn't realy matter where to we just like it anywhere"

It was from a very young attractive local couple and is sure to recieve many replies.

What worried me is the full unprotected sex bit. With sexually transmitted diseases on the up throughout the uk as well as teenage pregnancies reading this sort of thing is actually very worrying.

I sent them an email asking them if at least they do do protected sex as well , and they totally missed the point saying they would "do anything"
This kind of approach amongst the young, who are actively on a site like this seeking multiple partners has disturbed me no end.

Is this a one off?
What are the consequences?

Indeed is it up to us here to educate them? It seems as though someone along the line has failed to educate.At least I can only hope that and not contemplate the thought that it is in fact a conscious decision and evidence of a more disturbing trend of ambivilence towards a problem that is on the increase ,and needs to be addressed by all aspects of society.

Has anyone else come across profiles such as this and if so do you feel it is right to step in and educate?

I couldnt stop myself I had to send this reply : (abridged)

"Im not actually interested in you as you do the whole unprotected sex thing.Do you realise the dangers? I was checking for your sakes that you do at least use protection sometimes.

STIs and STDs are on the increase.

pls take care"

Should I have said more?

I cant help but continue to worry.

rm_Fatal210 32M
9 posts
5/18/2006 11:23 am

who knows if they already have STDs and that could be why there not worried about it
scary tho

maverick1255 51M
3953 posts
5/18/2006 11:54 am

Yea, I would have to agree. With everything that is going around right now. Better to play safe then be sorry.

Lets all play safe out there!


PS: you really do take great care of your self! Just - wow!

ilsuconu 56M

5/18/2006 1:33 pm

There's nothing more you could have said... if that's the way they play then sooner or later they'll have to pay the price. Ditto the other guys here... stay away!

(Oh, and thanks for checking me out! Don't be a stranger!)

pleasureyourclit 66M
836 posts
5/18/2006 4:42 pm

Sweetie, you tried to point them in the right direction that's all you can do. One would think they would wise up with all the information that's out there on STD... we can only hope!

Oh nice see this side of you, very caring person!


haversack_smith 40M
6192 posts
5/20/2006 1:58 am

(I kinda rambled here and ending up setting out my thoughts on the whole bareback sex issue - please don't interpret this as criticism of you or a response to the certain instance you described. Thanks.)

I kinda take the view that it's their bodies and if they're fully informed of the risks and if innocent third parties aren't being put at risk (e.g. one member of a couple isn't having lots of bareback sex while their partner thinks they're monogamous), it's up to them to decide how much risk they want to take with their lives. After all, safe sex isn't safe sex - it's just safer sex.

Now personally, for me, condom usage is the only way to go. Condoms might not give 100% protection but they reduce the odds of catching something nasty by a lot. I think people as a general rule should be using condoms outside monogamous (or at least, closed-group) relationships, and it's quite right to point out the risks and present the condom as a way to minimize those risks. The level of ignorance around is stunning - I remember seeing a profile a few years ago by a young girl who was looking for five or six guys to have unprotected sex with every week. A few days later, I saw her profile again and she was no longer seeking unprotected sex because someone had "clued me into the risks". There wasn't much about STDs and contraception taught when I was at school - the only lesson I can remember was to make the point that it wasn't just a gay disease - but surely sex education has to be better than that now? Obviously not.

But I think this is the point. I think it's right to inform people of the risks but if they make a fully informed decision to take those risks, it is their decision to make. (I have no idea if the couple in question are making a fully informed decision or not; please don't take this as criticism of you, it isn't intended to be.) One consequence of living in a free society is that there will always be some who destroy themselves through their foolishness, and I'm afraid you can't save them all.

rm_blacksami 43M
2 posts
5/20/2006 5:13 am

as if u have a gun on ur head ,,what that!!!! well having unprotected sex with strangers

HBowt2 59F

5/20/2006 9:44 am

you did you bit starlight...this is an adult site and if some adults want to be stupid you can't stop them.....just stay well clear and you can be sure anyone with any sense will do the same

AmberSolaire 42M

5/20/2006 2:43 pm

I think like always you did what you could.Some people wont listen to sense whatever you say.


cardiffbj 32M

5/21/2006 5:48 am

hi there,
i agree totally with what you think and what you did. i wisjh there could be something more than can be done, because STIs are a bigger problem than most think. some can cause infertility and everyone knows about the risks of HIV and AIDS.
i've had experience with an older couple that wanted unprotected sex [they didn't tell me until after i got there, and despite saying they wanted protected sex in correspondence], but i refused, and although wasting our time, i felt my health was more important than having a threesome!!
hopefully people will start to see sense and protect themselves against these problems!!


cardiffhorny2 36M
2 posts
5/21/2006 9:28 am

I think what you wrote was correct
Each to their own but I think as you said these people were young then I feel that friendly advice like yours was good for them

If they decide to listen well thats a different story

alphuctup 40M

5/22/2006 6:50 am

In the words of the great man himself...I pity the fools!

HotDev1l 45M
1265 posts
5/24/2006 6:11 am

I have to admit, if I knew someone that actually went looking for unprotected sex I would avoid them like the plague. Even protected sex has it's risks. To be so naive or so dismissive is completely flabberghasting. I have to say from what you have told us my first reaction was that it's not actually a couple or that the guy is the one that is doing the talking.

In any case, you did the right thing. There's nothing more you can do.

interested13563 53M
2557 posts
5/24/2006 2:46 pm

This is kind of worrisome. One should be careful!!!

doc2502 57M

5/27/2006 1:00 am

Hi starlight, no I don't think you could have done any more without offending them or switching them off from listening to you. People do risky things, like smoking (I am an ex smoker of 20 years +, knowing that they are risky, but think either it doesn't apply to them or it is something so far in the future why worry about it now. At least they are up front about it so us sensible ones can avoid them. I agree it's scary.
Doc, xx

flgators1981 35M
1 post
5/30/2006 11:43 pm

u have a very nice ass an i bet u are beautiful 261

moo_nips 57F

5/31/2006 4:11 pm

I admire the fact that you said something...something....something at so many of us would just would click delete...

but you stood up for all of us in a kind but concerned and literate fashion...

i bow my head...and thank you

moo_nips 57F

5/31/2006 4:15 pm

    Quoting HBowt2:
    you did you bit starlight...this is an adult site and if some adults want to be stupid you can't stop them.....just stay well clear and you can be sure anyone with any sense will do the same
wish i had read this comment earlier....would have just said see HBowt2 for her comment..

rm_EE407 41F
3903 posts
6/3/2006 12:21 am

Star, I think you were right to mail them. Just never ever have sex with them. That is certainly dangerous for your health!!!!

Btw.. to answer your Q, I've not seen it on my local profiles, but most men bitch & whine about condoms... Too bad!!! This is the age we live in!

midnightcaller_ 45M

6/20/2006 10:18 am

Starlight, Been told that there is a 3 month waiting list in cardiff for STD treatment, Seems not all of us have their heads screwed on.

Condom doesn't spoil the fun, trip to the clinic does.

rm_kelli4u2dew 41F
5220 posts
7/2/2006 11:42 am

When I lived in Kentucky, there used to be (maybe still is) a woman who advertised that she wante only unprotected sex. Good looking, fairly young. I used to ask guys who were interested in me if they'd ever met her, you know, kinda innocent like. If anyone had ever said yes ...

A little sex shouldn't be a death sentence.

OldHippy1957 59M

7/6/2006 12:11 pm

I think that was one of the best decisions you could ever make!

Someone has to tell them of the danger they're putting their lives in!

Once you catch HIV it's over! No more fun! No more life!

Unfortunately some people who already have the "Death Sentence" don't care who they take out with them along the way!

I had a friend who died from aids and I can tell you it's not pretty!

I'd have to say I agree with MidnightCaller; "Condoms don't spoil the fun... but a trip to the clinic does"!

Take care of yourself... no one is going to do it for you!

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