Jun 11, 2006 12:24 am Mood: pessimistic, 2405 Views
I know this one's probabely gonna get me in hot water,but I just can't help it!I've read posts here about "bots" and Their long drawn out monolouges.But till now I haven't"met" one.I stumbled upon one by the name of 2soulsmeetas1 all "she" writes about is safe dating on the internet etc. etc....What are you trying out for?A beauty paegent?Are you just some mindless drone?Or are you some kind of corperate toady,spewing your masters propaganda?Maybe you're just another "tool" of the machine!But why isn't anyone able to comment but "Your friends"By the way Where the hell are they? They never comment,multiple views...No comments...EVER!Zero Isn't a positive number!Didn't they teach you that in beauty paegent 101?Then again You might just be a "Jessica Simpson"WANNA BE!!! Feel free to respond,but I bet You won't 'Cause you can't.You see You're just a figment of someone's imagination!
It's just another saturday night(this is startin' to sound like a song)and I could just scream at the top of my lungs!Why am I stuck here all alone?I know part of it is my doing,but christ all mighty!Do I really desrve this Shit?Five years ago my wife ran off to live with here boy friend,Good ridance! I let her go willingly!things just weren't good between us.But suddenly one day,My folks both took ill and somebody needed to see to'em!Yup my,Sis is to busy... well... I won't go into that here.I moved back home to help take care o'their needs.Long story short,Dad dies..Mom goes downhill fast(stroke& all)ends up in resthome.No place for anyone to want to live.I bring here home,so at least she can have some sense of dignity.honestly she's to young to die in a home.Now my day revolves around work,tendin' to her and the meds and her meals, the house etc.Takin' care of a semi invalid IS NOT FUN believe me!Takin' care of a stroke survivor/diabetic isn't easy they need to eat every few hours,meds four times aday I won't get into the graphic detail!I work sometimes ten hours or more a day with no help,wonderin' if she'll be okay!I get no more than a couple hours sleep at any given time,It take's it's toll believe me.I have no personal life,or the time for it.If it wasn't for this site&my pc I'd be lost!Now please don't get me wrong,I just needed to vent and this is my only outlet! If I had a choice I wouldn't change any of this(Except havin' my dad back with us).My folks were always there to help bail me out of every jam I got my dumbass into.We were never close and more than a bit disfunctional,but when it came down to it they didn't let me or my sis down! I was never a mamma's boy,far from it! But now it's my turn to step up to the plate and be there for her,I really wish I could make things better for her,But all I can do is what I am.And I fully intend to continue as long as need be. I don't mean to sound as though I'm trapped 'Cause I'm not,I could have left her in the rest home like so many others.But she deserves better. Really all I needed was a chance to vent and this is the only place I have to do that. Do I regret Givin' up part of my life to do this?No but then yes Who wouldn't! But when the time comes and I lose her to,I'll know that I spent every last moment with her I could.If you've ever lost a parent or anybody You'll know eaxactly what I mean! Rant over now feelin' better Thanx for lettin' me rant!
Right now in my neighborhood there's this Big community garage sale.People are out in droves,snarlin' up traffic and useing all our parking spots.It's a real nightmare if you want to go somewhere,happens every year.Well I'm out on my back step watchin' everybody trying to get in and out,scramblin' to get the goodies before they're gone,When a pair of women walk by and one's wearing a tie dyed shirt...that reads ADULTFRINDFINDER.COM!I Haven't seen one before So I just had to ask where she got it.She buys T shirts at thrift stores and tie dyes them herself.Now Me bein' me I haveta ask"do you know what that means?" "no" she replied so I told her she should check out the site when she gets home.Will she? Will she ever wear the shirt again?Or will she get the shit shocked out of her when she logs on.Then again maybe she'll join.I always thought those shirts were an urban legend,never seen one let alone in public!
Sometimes when I'm Reading a post,or checkin' out the comments,I click on the poster's profile.It gives me a little more insight into who the person might be.It let's me know a little bit more about who you are,maybe evenhelps to see a little deeper into the post! So I'm sittin' here droppin' in and out,when it occurs to me to look at who's been viewin' me.I didn't expect to really see anybody there!Surprise!Seventeen!Many of'em before I caught my um DUMBASS mistake I made when I originally filled it out! See yesterday's post;WHAT THE FUCK WAS I THINKIG!!!Now i'm thinking maybe I should go back and redo the whole thing because parts still aren't totally honest.Not that I expect to actually get lucky, but because I'd rather people see more of me.I am here to blog for now.... who Knows later on. That bein' said,I'm now wondering How many of ya that checked out my profile Ran away screaming at the top of their lungs"I didn't just read that!".Or"you sick sumbitch"I'm sorry if it left unerasable pics in your head.Somebody really needs to invent a key board with a built in breath-a-lyser,for people like me!When ya breathe into it and you"re to toasted it would say"STEP AWAY FROM THE KEY BOARD NOW"then shut off the computor,For my own safety and others sanity!
I'm sitting here checkin' out blogs and the profiles that go with,and I decide to check out my own......What the fuck? I don't remember these answers!Right there for the whole world of Adult FriendFinder to see!Turn ons include "dirty diapers and anything to do with SHIT"!!!what the hell did they fuck it up? Then I suddenly remember...I posted the profile just to check out this site.I never meant to stay and was gonna erase later....Now that I'm here I can't leave,don't won't to!But I never went back to the profile,REALLY should've!I was a little (Little hell!)smashed when I filled out the profile and wasn't reading closely,I guess I mistook turn ons for turn offs!No I'm not into diapers! No I'm not into anything involving SHIT!And I was wondering why the checkout girl at the store gave me a funny look the other day!(I was buying some things for an elderly relative)What's so strange about a package of Depends diapers a jar of peanut butter and two cucumbers?Now I'm wonderin'did she read my profile?How many others did?I'm gonna go crawl under a rock now,as soon I'm sure the changes took in the new profile
I've met someone accidently that is also on this site!I was with some new friends the other night and while we're tossin' back a few cold one's they asked iff'n I 'd like to burn one!Who am I to turn down this generous offer?After a while,He's to out of it to follow the conversation, and she asks me if I'm Spunky....My fuzzy head clears and I go right to panic mode!But I told her the truth.Then she starts tellin' me way to much personal info(her fiance Is still there)she tell's me she'd be willing,I suggest talkin' it over later.We've continued to talk and things sound soooo promising,But her fiance is a friend and I won't do that to a friend,newly made or not...Damn where the hell did these morals come from?Oh well to make a long story short,no I haven't,Even though the offer is still out there.Maybe someday,if things don't work out between'em.I'm just not one to destroy relationships,had it happen to me and I don't want to cause the pain to anyone else Cost of a twelve pack $5.99 cost of"party supplies" $35.00 value of friendship? Priceless
Jun 9, 2006 11:15 am Mood: contemplative, 2420 Views
After reading Mzhuny's post this morning I got to thinkin'How do people see me?Do they see me?Do I let them see me?Most people don't see me for who I am"cause I don't let them.My friends might but only the close few.My friends are varied,Some rich and successful,some that many would consider freaks and outcasts.,some would be considered the dregs of the earth!So I'm standin'before the mirror and I'm thinkin'that those that truly see me probablely can see through me,what I am who and why I am. They are the few that know what I've been through.The one's I trust as my true friends are the ones most wouldn't give the time of day to,let alone give them a good job or lend a helpin'hand.My best friends wouldn't hesitate to help me,no matter what.I don't judge them, they don't judge me.Maybe it's the birds of a feather thing,but these are people many Wouldn't let into their house.But they would hire Us to do their roof,clean their house landscape the yard..On and on.We've fallen through the cracks in society's fiber,yet society needs US.Somebody has to do their shitty jobs,and we need to eke outa living.My friends aren't all stupid,many have high IQ's,Some are in the place they are by their own actions,some are not.So when you see someone that disgusts You or makes your skin crawl Or you don't like the looks of the people working to serve you,Just look in the mirror and ask yourself how do they see me?do they see me?Do they see a piece of my soul? Don't judge a book by it's cover...IT MIGHT JUST BE DEEPER THAN YOU THINK!
I see you in the grocery store. I see you in the bar I see you at the church I see you at PTA meeting Every where I look I see your face You might be a fireman You might be a cop you might be the neighbor next door You might even be the pastor at the church you might even be the doctor to whom I just went I see your faces every where I go And now I wonder to myself,*is that your blog I just read?*
My life, such as it is right now,is not really in good shape.The circumstances being what the are there's little I can do to change it,for now.So I do what I have to to drag my sorry ass outa bed and survive the day.Bright out look huh!Well that's how it is ,But recentlyI've discovered Adult FriendFinder and options have opened up for me!Bloggin'Is such a great outlet for me.When I have a really shitty day,like yesterday,Iblog it and people respopnd encouragingly!Or Ican weave and thread through lookin' for that special humor that cheers me up.Most of my time spent here is in the evening after a hard days work.That's when I'm sittin' here with an icy cold one gettin' lost in my safe place here.Before I know it the hour is late and there's way to many empties sittin' around,the ash tray's overflowin' and"occasionally"has the remains of afew fatties mixed in(might explain a few of my ODD responses)This is when I'm one with the world and nothing is botherin' me anymore(I know it's artifical but I'll take it all the same) This is somethings Ive discovered about bloggin' while drinkin' Beer. Don't take the IQ test found on the home page when you're drunk!(IF anyone's interested in the results ask I'll tell ya) be careful with your responses,stop think it through then type,THEN REREAD IT!think some more then post! Keep a clock in front of you so you can be aware of how late it is(not a good thing drinkin' til four am when ya gotta work at seven am,THE BOSS WON'T LIKE IT!Even if he does the same,He's the boss! Don't write yer profile drunk!I have to go back and redo mine soon! There are many more I'm sure but I'm getting a cramp from keyin' this so keep on bloggin' thanx for your time and responeses
Have ya ever had one of those days where ya just want to go POSTAL on the ICE CREAM MAN?You know, No sleep for two days, the boss goes on vacation..again!And NOT giving you your pay check first?A day where everything just crawls up under Your skin! Tha's how my day's been!I woke up go to lite a smoke and the fuckin' lighter died,Don't get between me and my first cig of the day!I get out of bed and step in the cat's hairball..UGH!Get in the car to go get lighter...No gas!The mail comes and all I get is aletter from the IRS (Can You say Audit). On and on all day long just more of the same.And NOW the ICE CREAM MAN,you know the truck with the loud ass PA system playin' that nerve wrackin' song over and over!And I'm on my last nerve stretched way to thin,It's rainin' out what the fuck is he doing out here anyways.And way the fuck is he just sittin' by my house?OH hell he's broke down,HE'S HAVIN'ONE OF THESE DAY'S TOO!Maybe he's got a lighter!
It's been said that writing is a door way to a person's soul.I actually believe this! When I read someone's Post sometimes I can catch a glimpse.There are so many good writers here, and some really good writing!So What does Your post say about You?If You view this please respond I am really curious to see what people say.To be fair I will tell You what I think mine says about me;I am a seventeen year old trapped in a man's body!Please respond ,THANX for Your time!
Saw this on the way to work not long back.I'm traveling down a country road when I look over and see this HUGE confederate flag waving in the breeze...the flag has big letters on it "GIT'R'DONE".This isn't all that surprising,I've seen'em before.But at the base of the flag pole is tied up,A Vietnamese Pot Belly pig.Standing next to this odd scene is a group of people with beer can's in there hands.Still not all that strange,but there was this barbeque pit flamin' and all the people were lookin'at the pig...I took a diferent road home,some things are best not known....
I wrote a blog recently, that might of been misinterpreted,in so doing I recieved two very good responses in with I felt I acted To quickly and might have misunderstood others actions if anyone was offended it was not meant to be taken that way.I'm Sorry.Before this blog could offend or piss someone off,I willingly deleted it.The taste of foot in mouth was too strong.Thank you for setting me straight.
