the new apartment  

sparkee58 58M
606 posts
8/8/2006 3:38 am

Last Read:
8/23/2006 8:32 am

the new apartment

the new apartment

Nikki was on her third glass of wine and Dylan could see it was starting to go to her head. As she raised the glass to her lips. a little droplet ran down her chin and stained her white tshirt a dull red. She didn't seem to notice. Her big brown eyes were unfocused, like looking at a full moon and thinking how time had suddenly slipped away from your life. When she spoke, her words were slurred.

"Nobody will ever love you like I do," she said and grabbed Dylan's arm. Those sightless eyes tried to focus on his. She smiled but her eyes looked through him into the distance.

"I know," replied Dylan.

"And nobody will ever love me like you do," Nikki slurred. She gripped his arm tighter, as if to make her statements clearer and more meaningful.

Dylan detached his arm and walked over to where Sunny was playing with the television remote control. He had found the right button and was flipping from one channel to the next. He stood over his four year old son and pride shone in his eyes. Sunny looked up from his perch on the floor with a crooked smile of obvious pleasure. Dylan smiled back.

"He's going to break it," Nikki said. "Sunny, stop!"

Dylan took the remote away from the disappointed boy, who gave a whine at his pleasure being brought to an abrupt end. Dylan looked around the new apartment. Full boxes were scattered everywhere. On top of one of these he found a flashlight, which he gave to the blond haired, blue eyed boy. Sunny pointed it at the screen and pushed the button. Dylan sat back and watched as his son played with the new toy.

"Tell me about Molly, Dylan," Nikki said. "If we're going to get married, we need to find out why your first marriage failed."

Dylan remained silent and concentrated on Sunny. He didn't look at Nikki. She noticed his relunctance.

"Why don't you put him to bed," Nikki said. Since they both seemed out of control, Dylan decided that was a good idea. Sunny was crying now, full of the knowledge that it was bedtime. Dylan picked him up and soothed his tears the best he could as he walked back to the bedroom.

Sunny always had trouble falling asleep by himself. If left to drift off alone, Dylan had found, he would sob brokenheartedly until, hours later, sleep would finally overtake him. To comfort the small boy, Dylan would lay in bed with him for awhile.

As he lay there with a nightlight shining like a faraway star, he thought about his life. He thought back to that March day when he was in the delivery room and they lifted Sunny up and handed him to the overwhelmed father. He had been the first to bond with this boy. He thought about Molly, with her deep woods talk and limited intelligence. She had lain in the hospital for a week to recover from the Caesarian and he had come everyday to visit and secretly snort cocaine in the private bathroom adjoining the room. He thought about Nikki and how her love of living and her ambitions precluded her giving herself fully to any one man for too long of a time. The world was too big; interesting people too many. If the planet revolved fast, she ran to keep up with it.

Sunny squirmed on the bed, shocking Dylan back to the present. They stared into each other's eyes.

"You need to go to sleep," Dylan told him softly.

He thought about Sunny. Nothing he had ever learned had prepared him for the sheer joy of fatherhood. To own and be responsible for something as vulnerable as this growing little boy appealed to him as nothing else ever had. He understood why unloved and poverty stricken girls in the small towns and inner city ghettos chose to have children without being married; they wanted someone that they could love, unconditionally.
It wasn't ignorance or rebellion that bred these children, it was love and the basic urge to be fulfilled as a human being.

"Daddy, I'm scared," Sunny said.

This simple declaration hit Dylan like a thunderbolt. Here, lying beside him on the bed, fighting off sleep was a rationalizing, emotional, independent being with fears and dreams and a will of his own. It wasn't just a sleeping, drooling, eating baby that told him this fact; that he was scared because it was the first night in a new apartment. For almost four years Dylan had looked at Sunny as belonging to him, as being his property and, with those three words, he had learned the truth.

He will never be owned, nor will any of us.

papyrina 51F
21133 posts
8/8/2006 4:12 am

i enjoyed that and was waiting for a differant ending but a wonderful true ending it was

I'm a

i'm here to stay

sparkee58 replies on 8/8/2006 9:06 am:
i'm glad you liked it, papy
it was an unforgettable moment

Nina_Dee 61F

8/8/2006 4:53 am

He will never be owned, nor will any of us. Such a way with words, Sparkee-I could just feel the emotion in it.

sparkee58 replies on 8/8/2006 9:07 am:
it was an emotional, eyeopening experience for me

marnison 79F

8/8/2006 8:36 am


sparkee58 replies on 8/8/2006 9:07 am:
never ever.

rm_1hotwahine 63F
21091 posts
8/8/2006 12:51 pm

Did I just get a whiff of autobiography?

Yeah, I'm still [blog 1hotwahine]

sparkee58 replies on 8/9/2006 2:03 pm:
most of my stories smell that way

FrankPicasso 52M

8/8/2006 6:02 pm

And yet a child of four will instinctively and inevitably claim ownership over the parent, with whom he or she bonds. The child refuses to compromise on this point. It's an interesting cycle of discovery. It's about growing up - for both parent and child.

Nikki's obsession with the remote control, and Dylan giving Sunny the flashlight in place of it - the best thing he could have done for Sunny, I think.


sparkee58 replies on 8/9/2006 2:05 pm:
thank you, Frank
Sunny is 20 now and he's his own man

rm_1SweetBitch 55F
8575 posts
8/8/2006 9:55 pm

Very nice

No Day Is So Bad It Can't Be Fixed With Great Sex!

1 SweetBitch

sparkee58 replies on 8/9/2006 2:06 pm:
you're not so bad yourself

catseyes23 61F

8/9/2006 3:39 am

You know, Spark? Some men's posts just seem to leap out of the pages at me and some are not even worth a mention.
Yours most definitely falls into the first category-you fail to disappoint.

sparkee58 replies on 8/9/2006 2:08 pm:
i feel that if the work disappoints myself
i won't post it
i hate to waste anyone's time, and i hope i never do

curiousinlorain7 59F

8/9/2006 9:48 am

what an amazing way with the written word... i'm truly in awe... thank you

sparkee58 replies on 8/9/2006 2:10 pm:
i'm glad you like it
come visit anytime, we're always open

wickedeasy 67F  
26843 posts
8/12/2006 8:07 am

that was so painfully adn beautifully written

stands and bows

You cannot conceive the many without the one.

sparkee58 replies on 8/13/2006 2:48 am:
thank you
it came from my heart

Become a member to create a blog