Fucking up a good thing  

sophia4u2no 49F
192 posts
8/8/2006 12:07 pm

Last Read:
5/20/2008 9:22 pm

Fucking up a good thing

Ok, as some of you may have witnessed, i have been having a pity party off and on for the last 2 weeks, some about my sister, some just feeling sorry for myself. I did something totally unforgivable to a person I had come to care about, and now he won't even speak to me, I can't apologize, or grovel, or do anything to make it better because HE WON"T TALK TO ME! Just total shut down the lines of communication. No, I didn't kill anyone, i lied, deluded and misled and ended breaking someones heart and losing what could have been the best friend I have ever known, so what do i do now? Let time take its course, Or i was thinking of giving his AdultFriendFinder handle and having all of you write him and tell him how sorry I am, and how stupid and worthless i feel, and that I would do anything to make it right, he doesn't have to be my friend, just forgive me, I guess i'm looking for absolution.


2daycowboywanted 45F

8/8/2006 1:06 pm

Dont give out his name - that might just be the last straw that breaks his back completely. Give him some time to sort things out and hopefully he will speak to you again. If he doesnt - then you should seriously learn from your mistake.

Until Later
2daycowboywanted


BlueEyedSoul65 51M
1027 posts
8/8/2006 1:07 pm

It is difficult when things like this happen and you realize there's nothing you can really do But wait. I think half the process of Absolution is learning to have the patience for it to arrive.
I hope things work out for you.


amoldenough 70F
16436 posts
8/8/2006 1:13 pm

You'll have to get absolution on your own. I don't know how, but that's the bottom line. You need to give him some time. Give it another 2 weeks and send an email. Tell him everything you said on your post here. That's about all you can do. Good Luck.

"Don't cry because it's over; smile because it happened."


rm_lionking_707 46M
10 posts
8/8/2006 1:16 pm

Don't give up, sophia. He will eventually realized how sincere you are in asking for an apology. If you know he's worth all your efforts, then do it. I'm sure very soon he will miss your happy times together. But, if his pride is reaching heaven, then it's about time to move on. When one door closes, another one opens.


buddhamike 106M
7006 posts
8/8/2006 1:22 pm

About all you can do now for certainis learn from this and not let it happen again. (with your next someone) Time may make a difference, but then it may not.


SuzieQ4U60 61F

8/8/2006 1:37 pm

You've read it above several times.... give him some time. I speak from experience. When someone hurts and or offends you, you need time to think about it. Time helps you think and it also lessens the hurt. I went out with someone, and things didn't work out and happen like I thought it should. A couple of things happened that upset me, and when I didn't immediately respond to his emails, they grew in number and then he got defensive. He wouldn't give me the time I needed to really digest what had happened. Now, we don't speak at all.

You just can't push.

suz


gentelmanjim53 63M

8/8/2006 2:41 pm

The above advice is all valid and comes from experiences we have all had at one time or another.If in time he dose accept your apology and you start the freindship anew there is one thing that will linger in his mind and that is trust. Keep yourself open and positive, responsive if he inquires but not to quick to do more than apologize. In his own time he may just want you as much as you want him. A relationship is two people compromising on every thing in life, happiness is not minding, love is learning how not to fight. I hope he gives you a chance. best wishes Sophia


vrec_dawn 40M

8/8/2006 4:31 pm

Well, no offense hun, but forgiving you is his choice to make, not yours. You trying to make him forgive you is hardly any better than you doing whatever you did in the first place. Neither are respecting him.


sophia4u2no 49F

8/8/2006 5:07 pm

    Quoting vrec_dawn:
    Well, no offense hun, but forgiving you is his choice to make, not yours. You trying to make him forgive you is hardly any better than you doing whatever you did in the first place. Neither are respecting him.
Thanks for that perspective, i suppose i truly am being selfish in wanting to get over the hurdle, i'll just wait and hope, at least for a little while.


sophia4u2no 49F

8/9/2006 4:51 pm

    Quoting rm_fotogod:
    You know, if you sent him a proper letter, written in blood begging for forgiveness, he might not throw it away.
    lmao
We teach best what we most need to learn. lmao,


vrec_dawn 40M

8/12/2006 7:55 am

    Quoting sophia4u2no:
    Thanks for that perspective, i suppose i truly am being selfish in wanting to get over the hurdle, i'll just wait and hope, at least for a little while.
Wow! I'm really glad you took that so well. I was afraid I'd be banned for being so blunt.

And I do really hope things manage to work out in the end. If he's worth the effort, then he just needs time to sort things out.


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