Self Depreciation..I am so guilty of that.  

softnlush 53F
878 posts
6/24/2006 7:37 am

Last Read:
7/5/2006 5:29 am

Self Depreciation..I am so guilty of that.


Probably the hardest thing about this site is describing yourself,even if you have pictures up,when you meet someone online,the question comes up..so what do you look like..and I just sigh,here it comes,how honest will I be? Well,I go for honesty..but I believe men reallllly do not pay attention to what you are saying..

I will say,I am 5'8,about 25lbs overweight but it is all over the place,cause it is..I am not overly hot,but very cute,I have a lions mane of brown hair,big brown eyes,I am bottom heavy (meaning wide hips,big ass and legs that I could do without the size),romanian genes that all the women have gotten from my mom's side of the family..I am not obese,I am not overly fat,but I am NOT thin or athletic or petite. Then they ask about the obvious..my breasts..they are nice,really nice and I tell them so..and that is all they take in..breasts..she has nice breasts,ooo 38C they are kinda on the big side too,yummy..tits...she got tits..yep,she is a hottie..HELLO..what about everything else I told you? Did you not get a full image?? Hello..yes,I have tits (and they are fabulous),but I also have a very extremely hour glass figure with emphasis on the very extremely lol.

If you want to imagine what I look like and ask me specifics and I am being TOTALLY upfront,why not acknoweldge everything,not just the tatas?

If a guy I was interested in,described himself,as lets see,5'5,about 220lbs,bald,yet his body hair resembles that of a small grizzly..I am paying attention..if he throws in a 8" cock 5 around..I am not leeching onto the penis..like wow,forget that I am not attracted to 5'5 fat hairy men..you got a big dick YOU ARE HOT!! NO!!

On that same token,if I saw a man I consider my type,over 5'10,average to athletic build,bald or hair on his head and not on his back,intelligent,honest and he said he had a 5" cock,would I say to myself..shit,he is really hot but damn..only 5"? Honestly..probably not,because if he knows how to work it..then who cares? Some would..I am just saying I probably would not care,unless well..he did not know how to work his magic with his smallish peepee.

What if I met a man who was less than gorgeous (have by the way),body not so perfect,but his confidance turned me on,he was tall..that I will not change,he must be taller than me,and he has a beautifully perfect sized cock..this man,will be the keeper..why? Have no idea..but I have found myself to be extremely attracted to men who got their shit together emotionally..who may not be the prettiest of packages but have something to offer other than a pretty face,being confidant about oneself (without being cocky) is extremely attractive and will always make me take notice. FWB is that man..but,again..circumstances being what they are...I am not exclusive and he is aware of the fact,I need more..

So back to kind of searching but not really..and hoping there is another one like him..that I can be open to the possibility of a 2nd FWB but with this comes the inevitable..having to describe myself to a potential playmate and I HATE IT!! I tend to be hard on myself and once I get past the icky parts of me and then they want to know the not so icky parts..that is all they focus on,which makes it uncomfortable when I decided to meet face to face..do I go topless to keep the interest? Can you imagine? LOL..ok..well,I guess it is my insecurities that I think I do not measure up to mens' ideas of what they want..so many gorgeous,better shaped women than me that I cannot nor will not compete with..I would love for a man to go against his usual way and look at the woman inside who stands before him..but it is not possible..just like women see a man before her and he may not fit what she thinks she wants,but I feel women tend to give him the chance to shine..to show her what he got..men,most not all,do not give us the same chance..and that is too bad for girls like me..but on the flip side,girls like me usually get the princes in the end..where the pretty girls..get well,what they get..

Somethin to think about eh?

~~~snl~~~

rm_bucfannn 61M/60F
2110 posts
6/24/2006 9:24 am

yea, I understand where you are coming from. When I had the girls up, not too many were extremely interested in what I looked like. Just the girls. Fine and dandy, this IS a sex site, ya know.

But, now that I have a face pic up, I keep getting mail wanting to see my boobs.

WTF? I'm much more than a nice pair of tits. Much much more. And, if those that cannot get past the physical image, then, FUCK EM.

I'm over the entire shit that goes on. The bullshit is almost too deep to wade through.

Again, I say... FUCK EM.


passion7523 51M
2931 posts
6/25/2006 12:19 am

softnlush, great post!, it would be great to live outside our bodies and meet each other without our pysical bodies present. it would be great to only reveal our physical bodies once we are comfortable with the person within! i am sure that if this were possible more jewels would be discovered and not passed over

wouldnt it be lovely
to touch,without seeing
to explore each other senses
and feel each others flow!
to share each others
fears, and delights!
to look within
and see each others heart
to know the real person
and to discover whether
indeed we can share
each others breath
see the jewels within
and only then reveal
the cover that binds us!


1Sir_Lancelot 59M

6/25/2006 7:58 pm

I think what it all comes down to is this : Are you comfortable in your own skin. If others want to judge you on your breasts alone then it only shows their own narrow mindedness. I know I'm not in the best shape and could use some toning up but if a potential partner wants to judge me on that alone then it's their loss. I try to look at the total person (inside & out).


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