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The Outsider's Guide to Play
The Outsider's Guide to Play
I don't think anybody really understands why violence and sex go together so well. One thing I do know is that the parts of the brain that respond to violence and sex are both adjacent to and inseparable from each other. Perhaps that's one of nature's greatest ironies that the same desire to reproduce is inextricably linked to our desire to hurt and kill.
One of the most notable examples of in history comes from the Roman Circus, just prior to the fall of the empire. After the thrill of watching gladiators fight to the death became passé, the Circus turned from bloodshed to as a means of entertainment. A gladiator or two would force a woman to have sex in the center of the arena while the spectators looked on. When even that eventually grew old, the Romans spiced things up by featuring five in the arena at once.
I find the sex-and-violence connection simultaneously disturbing and alluring. I loathe the objectification of women in society, and the dehumanization involved with real is deplorable to me. I firmly believe that society still has a way to go before it truly treats men and women as equals, and is one of the best indicators of the discrepancy. Yet, here I am, a fairly well-mannered nice guy, and I can't avoid the fact that turns me on.
What is it about it that serves as such a turn-on? Well, first off, I often find myself attracted to powerful women. I'm not submissive by any means, but when a girl goes all submissive on me, I have to admit it's a bit of a turn off. For me, I think when a woman fights back, even when she's just playing the role of a victim, it's a demonstration of her will and her power, and I think that's where a lot of the enjoyment of play comes from for me.
I think all of us want to be ravished once in a while, and every one of my previous girlfriends were intrigued when introduced to the idea of play. I wouldn't mind playing the other part myself once in a while. It's part of our nature; it's the natural effect of our brain chemistry. It may even be healthy in small doses, as long as we can keep in mind that the "play" in play is just as important as the " ."
One of the great things about sex is that it is one of the few times in modern society when we allow ourselves to indulge in some of our root desires. So then why shouldn't sex serve as a doorway to things we would never tolerate in the "real" world?
Am I sick or what?
2/14/2006 6:13 pm
I don't think you're sick. I also find myself fantasizing about .. I've only tried play once, but it just didn't go over well (the guy was too scared and worried about hurting me or going too far). I haven't brought it up to anyone since.|
2/16/2006 1:48 pm
When I said sex and violence go well together, I wasn't suggesting that they should be married, only that there is a strong link between the concepts of sex and violence ( i.e. they fit together neatly). Moderation is key. |
Also, I just wanted to point out that my blog was about play. I would never advocate the of an unwilling partner (that's not sexy at all), but I agree that if it's between two consenting adults, then it's just good, clean, kinky fun. Let's make it perfectly clear: Just because you enjoy bondage, doesn't mean you enjoy slavery. So, too, with play and .
Sweetbabydee07, I disagree with your supposition that can only be committed by men. Although women lack penises (thankfully), there are plenty of other ways to commit , and it's common enough if you look into the medical logs of a women's penitentiary facility. The motives behind female-female attacks are the same as between male-female, and male-male . Thus I would conclude that both men and women can be both the committers and the victims of , regardless of their anatomical equipment, but I understand your perspective.
As for wanting to take it in the ass while fighting a big guy off me. Well, I always say I'll try anything once, but I must say it doesn't appeal to me. Actually, all I meant by that was that I wouldn't mind letting my girl play the aggressor in our play some time, but I must say I enjoy being the aggressor myself.
One more thing I'll add on the subject: If anybody needs play to get off, whether you play the top or bottom, then get yourself some help. Otherwise, have fun.
Thanks for reading and putting in your two cents.