Non-sex site personals  

smartmama 58F
181 posts
11/7/2005 9:19 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Non-sex site personals


Yesterday I got a pic scanned. A clothed pic that my mother took when the girls and I visited my parent's this past August. It isn't an artful pic, and I am wearing some tropical skirt she bought for me to wear to dinner with the old people at the country club.I haven't worn it since. It is decidedly not hip,not really even me. But my eyes are sparkly, and I am holding my kids, happy. They are scanned out of the pic, and my daughter said the little slice of her that is visible makes her look like a Japanese Anime character. She laughed and laughed when she saw it. My hair is wet from a swim, and my smile is crooked, but big. I do have a crooked smile.

I have had these stirrings to go back to the the non-AdultFriendFinder Personals, the relationship with a capital R, personals, and update a profile that I had a couple of years ago. The funny thing is that the site, which I had found through the humor magazine, The Onion (Spring St. Personals) has now been sold to the people who own AdultFriendFinder/Friend Finder, etc. I started reading a blog about it by the editors of Nerve Magazine, who created this particular strain of personals out of the ethos of Nerve, which was young, edgy, sexy. I hid the profile when I got involved with someone, as I did here. The demographic was also very young, average age about 30, and I felt silly and ancient on the site. The members of this Personals site are furious with Spring St. because of what is perceived as a faulty platform here. So there is a blog called Nerve 911, addressing the fury at selling the site to the Friend Finder group. The rationale was that the Nerve/Spring St. group was losing money, and the Friend Finder group would allow them to keep their niche, blah, blah, blah. Someone made a snide remark about it being run by sleazes, the same sleazes who run that AdultFriendFinder porn, swingers site. Hehe. Will this post be censored, hope not.

Which brings me to today's thoughts. Many of the men are these smart hipsters. I want them and at the same time don't want them. Or maybe I just get overwhelmed seeing so many en masse. They probably feel the same about me. I am far away from my home town (NYC), yet miss it. I read the profiles and they all blur together into that metrosexual (which really is an awful designation, isn't it?) bespectacled, film going, world travelling, city man. Attraction and repulsion.

I was talking to a young male friend from AdultFriendFinder chat this morning. We were talking about sex. Sex without the trappings. We imagined what we'd do if we were together (he lives in the mountains north of me). We would nap, then wake to him hard, against me. Behind me. We'd slowly come together, and take our time, rocking, touching all over. Licking, stroking to a state of complete pleasure. It was lovely. A little laughing, nobody impressing anybody. Sex. no pressure. Sex and touching. Sex. There is just no accounting for that chemistry. I have seen him on his cam. He is hot in his unselfconsciousness. Quiet, but present. A father of three. A country boy. Who knows what it would be like if we met. As my friend Mikey says, enthusiasm counts for so much.

And if you block an abusive person, does that mean they can still read but just not comment? Guess so.

rm_VoodooGuru1 49M
2053 posts
11/7/2005 11:45 am

Provoking post, smartmama. I especially enjoyed your interest in lexiconology, demonstrated by this, and other posts.

I agree with you that "metrosexual" is an unfortunate term, but for different reasons. Why isn't there something in between? Why isn't there a term for guys like me - a guy who is neither a faggy metrosexual with dozens of skin, hair, and depilatory products in his bathroom, nor is he a Budweiser-swilling, Carhart-wearing, Van Dyke-sporting moron.

I'm highly educated, well-read, and even enjoy opera. I have but one fragrance in my bathroom -Bay Rum- and I wear it rarely.

On the other hand, I like cartoons, Peanut Butter Crunch, and I think that the Ramones are the greatest band that ever existed.

I fucking HATE ties, but I know how to tie three different knots, and I know which knot is appropriate for all suit/shirt combinations.

I do like a good suit, and can tell a good suit from a cheap suit without the price tag, all my collared shirts go to the cleaner, but I'm most comfortable in J. Crew or Ralph Lauren cargos or chinos. I own my own tuxedo, but wear it with patent leather Doc Martens just to be an asshole.

I'm not afraid to get my hands dirty, can perform most minor repairs on a car (as long as it isn't an electronics problem) But I wouldn't buy a American car (well, maybe the Ford GT), nor would I ever buy an SUV or truck.

In short, I'm not an ignorant red state misogynous bacon-eater, but I'm not some "Queer-Eye" micron-wearing fop either.

So waddaya call a guy like me?

BTW - not to conspicuously self-promote, but as the A FF code monkeys have taken away the "Read My Blog" option above commenters pics, I'll link it here, in case you're interested - [blog VoodooGuru1]


smartmama 58F

11/7/2005 5:20 pm

VoodooGuru, I am impressed that you can tie three different knots, which one do you choose most often? Did your father teach you?

We had bacon and eggs for dinner. Don't ya like bacon?

I had a gay roomate once, from Denmark. He loved Clinique products.

So waddaya call a guy like me?

How about a rock n' roll statistician.


rm_VoodooGuru1 49M
2053 posts
11/8/2005 4:06 am

Well, most often I leave my collar unbuttoned sans tie. I think that look, paired with a dark suit, is very sharp.

I tie a bow tie when I wear a linen or seersucker suit, but most often I'm tying a four-in-hand. The knot says, "traditional preppy" and works best with a more casual shirt, like a button down. You can not wear a four-in-hand with a spread collar, nor with a double-breasted suit (but who wears a double-breasted anymore other than Europeans, and, well, metrosexuals).

I can't be sure, but I don't think my pops taught me to tie my first knot. I think it was my moms, and I know it was for a cub scout merit badge.


cozy1957 59M

11/8/2005 11:47 pm

I'm not sure if I could even pretend to be a smart hipster.

I hope I'm not part of a blur.

Wet hair, sparkly, happy....I would like to see that.


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