 "And All I Got is a 2" x 2" Grey Silhouette" |
Jun 28, 2008 12:37 pm
Mood: bouncy, 487 Views |  | Dear Ms. Nefarious:
In response to your recent email, the last time I tried to fuck myself I almost ended up quadrapeligic.
But wouldn't you agree that there's something to be said for a man as persistent as myself? Anyway, I like my new plastic knees so much better than the one's with which I was born.
I am concerned that you continue to post a photo of a 2x2" grey silhouette with your Adult FriendFinder
profile. Am I expected to believe that this is you? As of late, have you found yourself needing to make furtive trips to all night supermarkets to purchase provisions whilst wearing a sackcloth over your head because of a hideous congenital defect? I am beginning to suspect that your DNA has become irreversibly scrambled with that of a fly's. Mind you, I'm very open minded, but I've got to get up for work in the morning. All of that "rustling about" is libel to compound the problems
I already have with sleeplessness due to those night-terrors I've told you about. Also, one likes to be given an opportunity to prepare oneself for a shock. Is this why you won't allow me to see your face, you poor, poor creature? Knock twice for no, once for yes...
Please send me your photo soon? I'd like to know what you look like so I'll know what I've been missing. I'm fearful I can't wait much longer since death due to my advancing age is imminent. Why couldn't you have sent me your photo 20 years ago when we first met?
Sincerely,
Your Sugar Daddy
_______________________________________________
It is understandable that there may be
many legitimate reasons for not wanting
your face posted on Adult FriendFinder.
Please Comment &/or answer any of these questions:
1) Have you ever refused to email your
photo to someone who has given you their's?
If so, why?
2) Has anyone you've met on Adult FriendFinder ever been
evasive when you've asked for their photo after you gave them yours?
How did you or do you feel about it?
How did you handle the situation? |
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7 Comments | |
| Women fuck who they want; men can only fuck those that let them... |
Jun 1, 2008 4:28 pm
Mood: Optomistic???, 582 Views |  | Right now, per Adult FriendFinder stats, there are 26,084,198 members of Adult FriendFinder. Of them, 15,595 are men broadcasting their poor, lonely hearts out on their live webcams. Simultaneously, there are 78 (?!) women broadcasting; 206 couples, 13 TV/TS/TG. Somehow, I think perhaps women aren't engaging in this activity for the same reasons that the men may be. A recent female webcammer (with audio available) was heard by this writer to utter, while she was in the throes of a passionate self embrace, "oh my God, you guys have just put me over the 50,000 views point!" Well... I don't know how long she's been a member, but, at the rate I'm going, I'll be lucky to average 100 views by the time my membership comes up for renewal 12 months from now! As for my email responses over three weeks: 47 sent (to women) / 14 responses (that's 33 no responses). Of those, 5 were auto-responses, 4 were phony come-ons trying to get me to sign up for another pay site in order to "get a date" and about 5 were from the same person, an actual woman of substance with whom I'm honored to have become friends, but who unfortunately lives on the other side of the world!
Of the many "couples cams" I checked out, most seem to usually be featuring only one partner and can you guess which one? Well, it "ain't" the gentler of the sexes, if you need the hint. I know, I'm begging the question.
I would appreciate at least the courtesy of a response from women to whom I write on this site. I'm tired of reading in woman's profiles that they don't want to hear from shallow men, need an intelligent guy to feel "turned-on", but that guys only send photos of their penises accompanied by a 2x2 grey silhouette. So I respond to THESE postings, WITH 2 count 'em, two (!) face photos(I know...this is my downfall!)NO penis shots, (Are they lying? Do they say "no,no and mean "yes, yes?") and then...the big nothing or an auto-response.
If you've taken the time join this site and perhaps paid for a gold membership, completed a 3 page profile, answered hundreds of personal questions that include such trivia as your personal hygiene habits, (do you floss with mint or regular?...waxed or unwaxed? Do you shave? Do you shave your face?) and then upload 20 photos of your ass, how "busy" can YOU be? No wonder there are so many penis photos being sent to your email! Why should any guy bother trying anything more time consuming? At least you sometimes feel offended enough to muster a response like, "if you send me shots of your penis, I won't respond." Well, THANKS for the warning, so I won't waste time angling about with my digital camera trying to catch my best side.
How about trying THIS warning? "If you write anything of substance, especially if it looks like you've actually looked at my profile, memorized all 20 photos of my ass, hot-listed me, or invited me to join your list of friends, please don't expect an intelligent, sensitive response. I won't email you, it will go straight to my filtered mail folder!"
Bitter sarcasm aside, just because I express an interest doesn't mean I'm hoping for sex (well...OK, so I don't always tell the truth)& just because I'm a man, don't think I'll have sex with any woman (oops...there I go again!) Please don't insult my intelligence. Be conscientious and spare some of your "valuable" time, OK?
So, what's my point since by now you've forgotten the question? (I myself had to go back to the beginning of this rant to remember) Oh yeah, "women can fuck who they want, men can only fuck the women who let them!" As illustrated by Adult FriendFinder.com, their posted numbers (and yours truly). |
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19 Comments | |
| I'm gonna have a MFMFMF with myself! |
Sep 3, 2008 12:26 am
Mood: Hebrephrenic schizophrinic, 45 Views |  | Inspired by CurvyOne72's blog regarding her match with herself:
I currently show a 50% match with myself. Seems that, because I am a man in search of a woman, I am only half compatible with me. I suppose if I were looking for a transvestite, I'd be a 100% match for myself! Unless, of course, the other half was a smoker, because half of me never smoked. Of course, I would encourage me to quit, (because I care) but I am a non-smoker, so it's a non-issue, issue. I suppose at this point in my life, I've met my dream guy, gal, guy... oh fuck it, I'm gonna have a MFMFMF with myself! I'll just go get my mirror and ask me for a date. Since I'm a saucy kind of guy, girl, guy... oh fuck it, I'll give me a try, but make myself earn it! I ain't easy, in case I thought I was just a push over. I'm going to take me to an expensive restaurant and pop the question. I can't live without me!!! But I hate narcissists so I'm divorcing myself from me! I can't believe I'd lead me on like that. So...
Where were I? |
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3 Comments | |
| I'll All Fit it in the Trunk of my '56 Chevy |
Sep 2, 2008 9:30 pm
Mood: wanted, 42 Views |  | Dear Luscious:
I'm a movin' to California, unless you'll come here to NY! However, who in their right mind would move to NY for any reason? So, that being said, I don't own much furniture. I'll all fit it in the trunk of my '56 Chevy. I'm pleased you're a neurologist because my insurance co-pay for care from a specialist is skyrocketing! I'm sure in return for your services, you'll appreciate my whittling skills. I could whittle little educational nervous system paperweights for your office waiting room. Your patients could get learned while they wait! How's that sound, baby?
I also play the fiddle and plan to learn the banjo but don't own one right now. I recently got a great deal on a set of bagpipes at a local yard sale. They sound great but the S.P.C.A. keeps showing up at my place threatening to come back with a search warrant because, believe it or not, they think I'm torturing my cat! I don't have a cat.
My income is higher than your average General Practitioner. At our annual county crafts fair, I sell my "art" and give out free corn dogs too! Still, in spite of the charity corn dogs, I make millions. I admit, they're are a tax write off, but old Uncle Sam loves a whittler and a fiddler... even a shitty one like George Bush Jr. for example!
I'll let you know when I'm ready to show up. I can only imagine how excited you must be to meet me. Don't worry, you won't have long to wait. I wrote a tune on my bagpipes especially for you and I can't wait for you to hear it! It'll turn you to butter on my corn dog. Even though you haven't responded to any of my emails, I understand how shy you must be, so it's OK. I'm on my way to you baby. Relax... Your lonely days and troubles are over.
As always,
Your Sugar Daddy |
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3 Comments | |
| My boss is a racist and a misogynist ... |
Aug 31, 2008 10:02 pm
Mood: concerned, & introspective, 63 Views |  | Ok bloggers, I've grown tired of bitching about Adult FriendFinder and my unfortunate encounters. So, I'll try something a little more dangerous and write about a social issue that has recently had an effect upon me and those for whom I care.
I work for an organization that treats inner city kids who are often court mandated in order that they be given an opportunity to avoid imprisonment for drug related offenses. As usual, an email to a friend inspired me to share my opinion here:
Dear "L",
I've just heard that "M" (a "white" staff counselor) got suspended for telling a belligerent "resident of color" to, "sit his black ass down in his chair", or something close to that effect. I don't know, I've witnessed our Assistant Director and our Director (who both happen to be "men of color") make public references to our residents as "niggas" and as "black", and I've also observed them offering similar directions regarding the proper placement of their asses in their chairs. They've never faced suspension or loss of their jobs as a consequence. "Crow Jim" rears his ugly head me thinks?
Are my perceptions skewed? Exactly what color was his "black" ass? Was "M" not properly politically color blind? Should he have been?... Was the resident brown perhaps?... beige? ...Yellow? I think if I, or a "white" resident were told to "sit my white ass down", no one would have objected or gotten suspended, regardless of whether the counselor offering the instruction were white, black, or any shade in between. My ass is tanned at this time, (I work hard to achieve this effect) so I might beg to differ that pale white, pink, black, brown or beige are entirely subjective perceptions, BUT having an "ass" to sit upon is generally a universal human condition and hence an "objective" perception regardless of what color it happens to be at the time the demand that one sit upon it is voiced by someone given the authority to make that demand.
I was educated over the years (I'm a child of the 60's who witnessed the civil rights movement & the assassination of Dr. King) to believe that the terms "negro", "Afro-American" or "colored" were considered racist and prejudiced in nature. As a young man, I found on occasion the need to correct my mother when she referred to, "that colored guy over there", exclaiming to her, "Geez mom, he's a black man! He's aware of that, and I don't believe he's ashamed; are you?" My grandmother used to whisper to me, when she felt the need to point out that "a 'colored' person" was nearby, watch out!" I come from a long line of racists and I am ashamed of that fact. I have tried to correct my perceptions. I am not "color blind"; who is? I do not appreciate anyone "pulling the race card" to take advantage of anyone. I believe if someone claims they are color blind they're being dishonest and I will challenge you and call you a liar if you fail to rationally present your case.
Holy fuck! Have we run out of effective language!!! Are we totally, linguistically bankrupt or are we afraid of being "blacklisted" (LOL!)? Is it true we are not permitted to notice or make reference to a person's skin color being different from our own, for fear of being "politically incorrect"? Where and with whom does the shame lie that gives rise to accusations that one is "prejudiced" and deserves to be suspended or even fired for simply stating a persons true color, or making reference to the color relative to where their (whatever color) ass should be? Or, do they have a problem with the word "ass"? LOL! There's plenty of those to go around! Our organization is full of 'em. As are opinions; like me, everyone's got one.
As always,
________{=}Xxx
Sorry this isn't funny readers (or is it?)
Regarding the issue of misogyny, this post has become too long, so I'll save it for another blog. |
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3 Comments | |
| Time wasters... get 'em to cut to the chase! |
Aug 29, 2008 9:33 pm
Mood: exanimate, 81 Views |  | Dear Miss Fortune:
I've been hanging out waiting for you to muster up the courage to get real... and I'm still hanging. What ARE you looking for? Stop it... OK? I really don't appreciate it. I'm a mature man and perhaps I'm not your type as you did indicate when you said you aren't usually drawn to men with a brain who appear interesting. I understand; please just cut the shit.
You proposed that you'll meet me and perhaps teach me how this site works and show me a "real woman", because you have "experience"? You've been a member for years and now feel SO sophisticated that at this point, you honestly appear afraid to meet me. So please Christine, and your husband "John", whom I've only recently had the pleasure of receiving an email from, stop coming on to me, then blocking your Adult FriendFinder email. I had no idea about "John"! Is he a big scary guy?
I wouldn't have taken this approach except you insulted me and so feel challenged to respond in kind. I'm frustrated by your cowardice. I like to have email friends that write back at least but I would hope they'd also "man up" or "woman up" to receiving a response. I truly don't appreciate fakes and cowards. Perhaps you'll have the courage to muster up a response here? In a public forum? Accept the challenge but be sure to use your spell check, dummy, because you sure can't!
Thank you for inspiring me. I've needed a blog topic. Someone here recently told me people on Adult FriendFinder lie but I just can't believe it!!! Can you imagine, the nerve of some folks? You'll probably write back to tell me again that you think I'm an asshole, right? But really, I ain't a bad guy. At least I never promised anything I wasn't ever really considering delivering. You did and you wasted my time, as I requested you avoid doing from first contact and as your profile expresses others not do to you.
I don't believe you are a nice, sophisticated woman at all and doubt your marriage is a happy one. I'll bet I may get a response now though, and that, if I don't, you'll have difficulty resisting responding. Am I wrong? So... prove me wrong. ...double dare you? (LOL!) Just because you're pretty (if that is in fact you and not John's alter ego)it doesn't make you attractive at all. This is a limited time offer!
Respond soon?
I've not much time left,
Your Sugar Daddy
And you know what fellow bloggers? I got a letter back from hubby "John", calling me an asshole, and then I was blocked from responding which is why I wrote this (a somewhat edited version of my original note). I think perhaps I was communicating with "John" all along. I suppose some guys get off posting their wife's profile, to find out if she's "really" attractive to other guys and women. What a brilliant mind... and a marriage made in heaven.I hate evasiveness, dishonesty, & cowardice. I wouldn't block anyone from telling me their thoughts or even telling me off, unless I felt I was full of crap from the get go and needed to avoid them should they come at me with something resembling the truth.
This individual/s believes I have a resentment against this "site". This site is comprised of people like you and I just looking for friends.
I don't appreciate being patronized. Do you? ...perhaps you think I overreact? It wouldn't be the first time but I do so love to rant! (albeit impotently) and rave at times. I don't resent Adult FriendFinder. I'm quite entertained, beats TV! Although it is unfortunate that Christine and "John" will likely never read this or have guts enough to comment. |
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4 Comments | |
| What's MY problem? |
Aug 21, 2008 6:55 pm
Mood: weird, 132 Views |  | I may be brain dead. Perhaps I need to get medical testing ASAP... What can be my problem? Adult FriendFinder isn't helping me get laid...
My "poetry sucks" I think...
No one comments... 500 viewers, 10 comments???
I think (i.e. )...how come if you are blond with big tits, even if a girl only wants to know if you like your balls sucked, she'll get 2000 responses within two days? ...and I get 3 guys who say, "yeah right bro... who the fuck knows... sucks huh? hee, hee..."
Well, what can one assume?
Am I begging the question... again?
Hee... hee... |
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9 Comments | |
| A "Friend with Benefits" ? |
Jun 15, 2008 2:11 pm
418 Views |  | Finding a dream girl online
is a little like shadow boxing
only sometimes the shadow has
a hell of a right uppercut
did I forget to mention
I have a glass jaw?
Finding a dream girl online
is a little like "a box of chocolates"
you never know if you've got
a fresh vanilla buttercream or
a stale jelly from a box of assorted fruits
and nuts (artificially flavored?)
Finding a dream girl online
is a little like casino gambling
the fix is in
the House knows it will always win
and at the end of the night
you'll probably go home empty handed.
Finding a dream girl online
is a little like Russian Roulette
but instead of using just one bullet
all the chambers are loaded but for one
and the others are using blanks
excepting one (pulling the trigger is such a rush) |
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4 Comments | |
| A Plea for a May / December Relationship... |
Jun 14, 2008 12:47 am
Mood: Senile, 414 Views |  | Dear Ms. Vishous,
I don't think I'm old but since you're 35 you probably do. Still, I thought it would be harmless to write you since you say you have found what you're looking for & you're just here to blog & look all hot. You do; but honestly, I can't detect a bit of sweat in any of your photos. Don't get me wrong, although I am partial to sweaty women, I would never DEMAND that a woman sweat for me, that would be unreasonable and sexist. I think Betty Friedan was considering starting a "third wave of feminism" as a reaction to this phenomenon, commonly found among misogynists that join Adult FriendFinder.
When I discovered your profile I noticed you were on line. I felt compelled to page you until I noticed that as I was picturing myself in rapturous communication with you, one of my normally robust male anatomical parts had shrunk from 12 inches all the way down to 5 or 10 times its usually impressive size, as if I had just stepped out of a 36 degree ice bath. It REALLY scared me!!! I know, you're probably thinking, "how could a guys skull actually shrink that much in a matter of seconds? That's impossible, this guy's just another Adult FriendFinder bullshitter! Does he really think I'd fall for THAT line. Anyway, the size of a guys head doesn't really matter. How he uses it is what counts."
I've always wanted to meet a woman who owned a golden lasso like the one you say you own. Myself, I own a wooden garrote with golden piano wire attached. I only take it out on "special" occasions. The last time I used it, I was dating a republican. Needless to say, it was a one night stand.
Anyway, I was going to try and be funny.(so much for that notion) That way you would be laughing so hard you might not think to check out my profile or notice my age.
I have been courageous enough to feature an unfortunate face picture. This photo was taken prior to shrinkage, so my head matches my torso...sort of...well no, to be honest, I Photo-shopped it. So you see, I'm just an honest guy searching for someone like myself who will lie to me.
By the way, what does that little red X next to age on your profile mean?
Write soon,
I haven't much time left.
Regards,
Your Sugar Daddy |
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5 Comments | |
| Phony e-mails from "women" half my age. |
Jun 1, 2008 11:04 am
Mood: aggravated, 422 Views |  | Does anyone else out there find this sort of thing offensive? I am now including this note as a matter of routine when responding to "matches" if they present the following "type" of profile:
__________________________________________________
Hello ________,
I've noticed a # of profiles coming in as a "match" for me, like yours. Please let me know if you are "real" (even if you aren't interested), because I am getting return emails attempting to get me to subscribe to other pay sites in order to "get a date". It is very disappointing as you can imagine, a waste of my time, and I don't pay for a membership on Adult FriendFinder to be "enticed" away to other pay sites. These profiles all seem to be posted by girls in their 20's, include no details other than "looking for my soul-mate" or something similar,follow the same pattern of typos and misspelled words, & are posted by non-paying "members". They "claim" to be from Albany, or are emanating from the Albany, NY area. They also don't appear to be "active" (working?) on the weekends, i.e. most of them today, Sunday, state last visit was Friday. How many real members don't use this site on weekends, really now !
I am going to begin reporting these to Adult FriendFinder as I find them. If you are real, please help me put a stop to this member abuse.
Yours,
Sleepless
__________________________________________________
Inevitably, they cease to respond. Just a heads up to paying members, if your a "newbie" like myself. I intend to report this to Adult FriendFinder customer service. Hopefully they can intercept these before they become standard profiles and "time wasters". It's probably difficult but allowing this practice to go unchecked seems bad for Adult FriendFinder's credibility as a legit' site worth your hard earned cash. |
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3 Comments | |
| To link to this blog (sleeplessinNYtoo) use [blog sleeplessinNYtoo] in your messages. |
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