Pushing Boundaries  

sj_wine_cpl 46M/45F
6 posts
9/5/2005 7:17 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Pushing Boundaries

Pushing boundaries is, probably by definition, a messy venture. Without knowing in advance where is the right place to stop, we set ourselves up for failure. And that’s OK. Pushing boundaries means accepting that you will fail at some point ‒ you will make a mistake, you will go too far, you will have to step back, and through that process you will discover yourself.

We’ve done exactly that. Being here on AdultFriendFinder, showing off on cam, and determining how much we will open our sexual relationship, have all been about testing and pushing our boundaries. In the course of exploring, we’ve made mistakes.

Our mistake regarding camming? Our sex went from an expression of emotion to simple porn. We began having sex on cam that was purely physical, neither loving nor fulfilling. Our cam sessions would leave our bodies sated but our hearts and souls empty. What I’ve always hated about porn, we performed in our own bedroom. That was a mistake. So, we step back, and we reassess. We will be back on cam, I have no doubt, but we probably won’t be interacting with the viewers nor will we necessarily be as interesting to watch. Great sex for us can be long, languid, and delicate then quick, hard, and rough then back then back again…over and over until our bodies can’t take any more and we let go. Doesn’t make for good porn and might not be very interesting to watch, but it is deeply fulfilling to us both. We'll see how it plays.

As for opening our sex life? Our mistake was discovering our boundaries through interactions with someone else. We created frustration for another couple by setting up a time to get together and meet in person, then going through the drama of "should we, shouldn’t we". Ultimately we determined that our bed is not open to others except those who watch us online, and coming to that realization required the involvement of someone else. Without that impetus, we never would have pushed the issue far enough to discover how we felt. Luckily, the other couple were incredibly gracious (as we’ve found so many of the couples here to be) even as plans were made and then put off, and now we know where things stand for us. Relationships evolve over time, and we’ll see if this boundary in our relationship moves or holds firm.

In the end, we were lucky to come back together and fall in love again. Pushing boundaries helps us find each other ‒ and that’s truly why the two of us are here.

sexgoddess2462 46F  
42 posts
9/5/2005 1:22 pm

Very hapy the two of you have found your limits and most important still find your love for each other.

Wish you both all the happiness in the world.

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