Seven Degrees of Blonde  

sincitybrunette 55F
3159 posts
8/14/2005 7:58 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Seven Degrees of Blonde

First Degree:
A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning. The wife (undoubtedly blonde), picked up the phone, listened a moment and said, “How should I know, that’s 200 miles from here!” and hung up.
The husband said, “Who was that?”
The wife said, “I don’t know, some woman wanting to know if the coast is clear.”

Second Degree:
Two blondes are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror and says, “Hmm, this person looks familiar.”
The second blonde says, “Here, let me see!”
So the first blonde hands her the compact.
The second one looks in the mirror and says, “You dummy, it’s me!”

Third Degree:
A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun.
She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door she finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really angry. She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she is overcome with grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her head.
The boyfriend yells, “No, honey, don’t do it!!!”
The blonde replies, “Shut up, you’re next!”

Fourth Degree:
A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals. She proudly says, “Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them.”
A friend says, “OK, what’s the capital of Wisconsin?”
The blonde replies, “Oh, that’s easy, W.”

Fifth Degree:
What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?
“Is it mine?”

Sixth Degree:
Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA freshman, sat in her US government class. The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs Wade was about.
Bambi pondered the question then finally said, “That was the decision George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware.”

Seventh Degree:
Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime.
The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit, patrolling nearby was the first to respond. As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps.
Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, “I come home to find all my possessions stolen. I call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a BLIND policeman.”


ByteChaser2 53M

8/15/2005 7:07 am

LMAO!!! Nice!


overworkedloon 56M
400 posts
8/15/2005 7:36 am

Three steelworkers, an Irishman, a Mexican and a Blonde, were eating lunch on the 30th floor of a skyscraper under construction. The Irishman opens his lunchbox and says, "All the time it's a corned beef sandwich, I swear if it's corned beef again tomorrow I'm just going to jump." The Mexican looks in his lunchbox and says, "Tacos again, I swear if it's tacos again tomorrow I'm going to jump too." The Blonde looks in his lunchbox and says, "Balogna, If it's balogna again tomorrow I'm jumping with you."
The next day at lunch they are sitting together again. The Irishman opens his lunchbox, sees corned beef and jumps to his death. The Mexican sees he has tacos again and also takes the fatal plunge. The Blonde sees balogna and also dives off. Shortly afterwords the wives are sharing their misery. The Irishman's wife says, "He told me he didn't want corned beef again, but I never thought it would come to this." The Mexican's wife says "I thought he liked tacos." The Blondes wife says, "He fixed his own lunch this morning."


sincitybrunette 55F
1668 posts
8/15/2005 7:43 am

Byte - glad you liked


sincitybrunette 55F
1668 posts
8/15/2005 8:51 am

overworked....like that one....


sincitybrunette 55F
1668 posts
8/15/2005 12:41 pm

mzhuny - some days it seems thats all I ever hear, blonde jokes


gemini0157 59M  
6842 posts
8/15/2005 12:42 pm

What do you call a blonde that dyes her hair brown?...... Artificial intellingence!


artistforexploit 60M

8/15/2005 7:28 pm

sincity: huh? I don't get it....


sincitybrunette 55F
1668 posts
8/15/2005 10:29 pm

gemini - thats exactly what I just did


sincitybrunette 55F
1668 posts
8/15/2005 10:29 pm

harshaw - most blondes can screw anywhere....


sincitybrunette 55F
1668 posts
8/15/2005 10:30 pm

artist - I could explain it to you very slowly if you need me to... lol


HardCailisfive 77M

8/16/2005 7:29 am

At least he had a dog. Here in Denver, the cops shoot all the bystanders. Even ones just drinking soda pop in bed.


sincitybrunette 55F
1668 posts
8/16/2005 8:30 am

hardcailisfive - got to love that.....


artistforexploit 60M

8/16/2005 5:49 pm

sincity: okay, I'm listening


sincitybrunette 55F
1668 posts
8/16/2005 7:24 pm

artist - it would have to be a one on one explanation.....otherwise you still might not get it...


sincitybrunette 55F
1668 posts
8/16/2005 7:24 pm

sexyfit - I thought so too


pusstretcher3 45M
1 post
8/16/2005 8:37 pm

those r great! lol, off my butt!


sincitybrunette 55F
1668 posts
8/17/2005 1:00 am

pusstretcher - aren't blondes wonderful


jonnyblong 55M

10/17/2005 3:46 am

THERE FOR A MINUTE I THOUGHT ABOUT SOME FRIENDS OF MINE, THEY WOULD FIT THE 3, 5, 7 JUST RIGHT DOWN TO A T.


sincitybrunette 55F
1668 posts
10/17/2005 9:08 am

jonny - that is most of my friends...


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