Can you really understand completely how they are feeling?  

sincitybrunette 55F
3159 posts
7/9/2005 11:56 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Can you really understand completely how they are feeling?

First let me say 'hi' since this is my first try at this.

I started reading different blogs when a friend gave me the website and told me that I would be intrigued by what I read.

I have found that there are a few people in particular that I thoroughly enjoy what they have to say and how they say it. However, sometimes its hard to understand the feelings that are being put into words. Part of me understands where their thoughts and emotions are, yet part of me wonders what they could possibly be thinking.

I recently read a blog where the writer is torn between two paths that he feels he must explore. I understand that the path not known is one that is exciting and adventurous and he felt that it must be explored to squash his curiousity. But he also states that this decision would ultimately hurt someone that he cared about. I guess that is where my confusion comes into play. If he had someone close that he cared enough about that he knew this exploration would hurt, why did he feel it was so necessary to make that exploration.

Once again, I can only guess that it would be something he felt he must do and so "go for it" I would say to him.

I would love to know someone elses opinions on this and whether or not you are in agreement....

nickname6925 37M

7/9/2005 3:18 pm

this is such a good post, keep going

wyvernrose 38F
3895 posts
7/9/2005 3:27 pm

it is simply because he desires too does not mean he will but everyone must work their way through to their conclusion and many do that here, when you care about someone there isn't merely your own desire to account for but the impact persueing your desires may have on them, and so oftimes people with our interests will NOT persue our desires for the sake of our partners, instead deciding on our own without involving them, which isn't always the smartest thing but whoever said humans were bright, majority of the time the only reason we don't even broach these topics with our partners before reaching our own independent and often flawed or incomplete conclusions of fear of a rejection from our partners for the desires we feel......but if yours truely is a partner sharing is something you should be able to do particularly of these types of desires and so with our partners contribution and possibly support we can make an educated decision without the hit and miss of assumption.....and even if we do not persue the desire we can work on it with our partners....


sincitybrunette 55F
1668 posts
7/9/2005 6:19 pm

nickname - thank you for the comment

wyvernrose - yours is one of the blogs that I truly enjoy reading. Thank you for taking the time to give me another opinion....

wyvernrose 38F
3895 posts
7/9/2005 7:23 pm

your welcome sincity


tombvortx 70M
1 post
7/11/2005 10:49 am

The path branches and you see the directions, but only a little way before it is obscured by time and remembrance. The path branches again and again. There may be no trail of crumbs to find your way back if you wanted… in one sense what The Moody Blues said ‒

“I don’t know what I’m searching for
I never have opened the door,
Tomorrow might find me at last,
Turning my back on the past,… Memories can never take you back, home, sweet home.
You can never go home anymore.”

even out of context is appropriate here. Can you take your friend with you? Or do they even want to go? Or is that the correct question? Why does it have to be either or…?

There is nice love poem by Phoebe Moon: “Going Home”

But if it is self absorption and self indulgence which motivates you and your whispering sense of guilt enables you to not speak your desires to your partner… then what?

Will there be forgiveness and growing or only forgetting?

StaceysHubby 52M

9/20/2005 12:56 pm

Hello again, I felt compelled to see where this blog began (you fascinate me)and I am impressed with your intellect. I undertand the question all too well as I am in a similar and unenviable position. For me it's fairly simple though, I believe I can take that untraveled path without hurting the ones I love. My alternate path however is more simplistic than the one I beleive your refering to, mine quite simply is lust. I am seeking to expand my sex life, I feel as though I am withering away and constantly frustrated. Don't misunderstand me, I do love my wife but our schedules and having two young children have put a serious dent into our sex lives and my wife is more accepting of this, she has slowed down as far as needing sex as often as I do. We have discussed the topic, so I am not making an assumption here, we both know I need it more often than she does (she jokes that when the wind blows my dick gets hard) but she goes to bed early, out of necessity (our daughter still sleeps in our bed), and I am left wanting, literally. Does this make me a selfish or bad person, wanting to fulfill my physical needs without wanting to hurt my wife or my children emotionally or destroying our family that I cherish. My wife and I still enjoy sex it's just far too infrequent for me and it's usually more of the quickie variety while the kids are watching television and playing or if we go out for dinner (baby sitter)we stop on the way home and do it on or in the car, exciting but not getting it done in the long term. I have activities that take me out of the house in the evening two or three times a week, the wife and kids are asleep anyway, so I'm thinking of just adding some adult fun to those evenings if I find the right woman. I haven't yet, but I think it's just a matter of time. That's my first hand perspective, sad isn't it? A once proud, sexually active, dare I say studly man now withering away, reduced to skulking around the internet for elicit trysts. I hope you don't think too poorly of me having revealed the necessity for ananimity.

rm_wmpk 67M/69F
61 posts
11/2/2005 4:09 pm

great blog


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