Beauty or the Beast  

sincitybrunette 55F
3159 posts
7/27/2005 1:34 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Beauty or the Beast

Should someone's physical appearance be the sole basis for rejection?

I am an avid peoplewatcher and noticed the other day, to my dismay, that people are definitely put into categories by their appearance. I was raised to believe that you should judge people by who they are, not by what they appear to be. Sure, outward appearance is important to most, but when do you take the time to get to know the person inside?

After reading numerous blogs and answering most of my e-mails, I realized that most of the men on this site, are really looking for that hot little piece of a**. They want a woman that is easy on the eyes and great in the sack. But then again, the women are just as bad. Sure, a nice hard body is great, but its much better when they know how to use what god gave them.

I have thought about this, and I think that I would much prefer someone with a kindness and confidence about themselves over someone who is just to damn hot to look at!

Any other opinions?

artistforexploit 60M

7/27/2005 5:15 pm

No, you pretty much nailed it down, a friend makes a better lover than a piece of eye candy, but if you get both, well kiss your lucky stars, I'm still waiting to find eye candy that has more than their looks to go on. Most have issues, no, no, make that a lifetime subscription.

sincitybrunette 55F
1668 posts
7/27/2005 5:50 pm

artist - maybe you should look for the one that has more than their looks to go on before you look for the eye candy. You might find yourself pleasantly surprised.....

rm_WizardTim12 50M
44 posts
7/27/2005 6:38 pm

I agree with you, very much.
I think the issue is that everyone makes some allowance for looks, the rest for personality, and the trick is finding the right balance of the two. Most everyone acknowledges that personality is more important than looks, but how much more?
So personality is at least more than 50% of the mix.
Virtually no one is capable of truly saying personality is absolutely 100% of the issue, looks 0 %. So most people must put personality somewhere between 50% and 100%. The trick is figuring out what is a good balance for you, and not letting other people throw you off.
I think part of the problem is that people assume that most people have the personality percentage too low, ie they pay too much attention to looks. As a result, whenever anyone tries to make a comment about appearance, they're shouted down, and told that shouldn't matter. Well, maybe so, but since it does matter IN PART, shouldn't we try to figure out what that part is, rather than trying to pretend we don't care about looks at all? You can't fix or adjust what you're not willing to admit is there. That way, if you realize you're letting your hormones run away with you, and placing too much emphasis on looks, then you're in place to do something about it. And then watch your relationships improve.

Just my 2 cents worth.

rm_txrose4uNTX 57F
3289 posts
7/27/2005 7:36 pm

I was raised with my Grandma's beliefs that you look at their soul and not their appearance. Appearances can be deceiving and supply us only surface relationships rather than the dimensional relationships that we truly desire. Give me a good soul versus a good appearance any day!!!

gemini0157 59M  
6842 posts
7/28/2005 8:20 am

Come to think of it..... I am usually attracted to the intangibles that a woman possesses. Things I really can't describe... and for each person it's different...but, I don't care how hot you are... If you're pretentious or unkind...... big turn off!

sincitybrunette 55F
1668 posts
7/28/2005 9:34 am

wizard - do they really acknowledge that personality is more important or is that something they keep inside to themselves? Most people see what they want outside first, then take the time to see what is inside. Its just too bad that a lot of times, good people are overlooked because of their outward appearance.

sincitybrunette 55F
1668 posts
7/28/2005 9:38 am

txrose - if only more people were raised with that knowledge. I have always tried to base my personal relationships on who the person is inside. Appearances can be deceiving and hurtful. I will take the good soul over the outward appearance any day....

sincitybrunette 55F
1668 posts
7/28/2005 12:22 pm

gemini - a man that I would really like to get to know......

abdoullah5 40M

7/28/2005 2:39 pm

salut je te trouve attirante seduisante et tres exitante et ma grosse bite te convient tres bien je crois biz

pornosteve2004 52M
4 posts
7/30/2005 8:56 pm

sincity, i don't know if this has anything to do with your post or thoughts, nor do i say this to piss you or anybody off, just wanted to pose this question to you---- if you were sitting on a nude beach and doing the people watching that you like to do, who would get the longest look from you a 1.) a average guy say like me who's 5'10" 210 lbs + average endowment or 2.) someone who's say 6'1" or 6'2" 200 lbs athletic build and well endowed---- and which one would you strike-up a conversation first. let me know then i'll tell you why i asked. thanks, steve

sincitybrunette 55F
1668 posts
10/9/2005 10:50 pm

steve - honestly, the average guy would be the one to get my attention. I am not really turned on or interested in the ones who look like they are really stuck on themselves.....

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