In Love  

shychurchmouse 49F
418 posts
4/14/2006 3:39 am

Last Read:
6/13/2008 10:08 am

In Love


I have never understood the statment " I love you but I am not in love with you".

I know I am capable of love which is very evident in my feelings for my family and the fact I was with one man most of my life.

I have friends that I will always love or people in AdultFriendFinder chat that I luv. I am having a difficult time understanding how a person can still love their spouse or whatever and not be "in love" with them.

Do they love different then I do? Do they love better then I do?

I understand that there are different types of love. The love I feel for my children is a love unlike no other. The love I feel for my siblings and parents is different then the love I feel for my ex-husband.

I have heard various friends tell me they love their spouse but no longer "in love". I can't understand what this means. I understanding love changing. Young blind love, no matter what they do or say you love them and live with there flaws. As you get older the flaws seem to stand out more and being less tolerable.

Finally, in my case; came a point where I still loved my ex-husband, I could just no longer tolerate certain habits.

So now I guess I am hoping someone can help me unsterstand the difference between love and in love as I just don't get it.

rm_deuce1963222 53M
77 posts
4/14/2006 5:53 pm

I think you can love someone and not be in love with the.Meaning a spouse or an ex spouse.In love means they still give you that feeling of excitement and cannot wait to see them.You think of them constantly.And I think you can love someone without being in love with them.This could be from the way he treats you.The type of person they are,the things you still share and have shared,


shychurchmouse 49F
239 posts
4/15/2006 11:44 am

Deuce thanks hun, still waiting for news about your bike. Imagine that you came out of the accident at least alive, which of course is a good thing.


runzwithknives 59F

4/15/2006 1:09 pm

There are many forms and depths of love. Those for children, parents, siblings are far different than what I felt for any of my husbands. I have a close male friend with whom I've shared alot over the past 8 years. I love him very, very deeply. But I am not "In Love" with him.
And another male friend I am growing to love on a different level. But I tell ya, shy...I don't get it either because I really don't ever think I've been "In Love". Close but not there yet. Maybe I don't really know how??


shychurchmouse 49F
239 posts
4/15/2006 2:44 pm

Runzwithknives is that it? Have I never been "IN LOVE"? I know I have been "in lust" before.


runzwithknives 59F

4/15/2006 7:57 pm

heehee. In Lust plenty of times too. I honesty don't know, shy.
My friend of 8 years? Not In Lust or In Love with him. And not when I slept with him either. If he asked I would sleep with him again. simply because we Love each other. And that is a special sharing.
But I sure don't know what being "In Love" is or how it feels. Not when each of my 3 marriages has failed. Because I thought I was "In Love" there too...


smackyman 45M
3843 posts
4/15/2006 10:32 pm

I was 'in lust' a few hours ago...and now I'm just - yawn - sleepy...*grin*


shychurchmouse 49F
239 posts
4/16/2006 9:40 am

smacky well damn did u fly in and I didn't even know?


shychurchmouse 49F
239 posts
4/16/2006 6:07 pm

runzwithknives well it makes me feel better to know I am not alone.


rm_unzipme48 63M/54F
19 posts
4/11/2007 6:43 pm

I am so glad you love me different then your ex.....I was only kidding when told you to keep it in the family...LOL
I love you sis...As much as my children and grandchildren...You are my favorite sis...
Love is a VERY deep emotion it has many faces,and more sharp edges then a knife....
Just know that you have loved,do love and will love again..


shychurchmouse 49F
239 posts
4/19/2007 4:01 pm

Sis could never love you my ex. Mauhs


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