My so called Life  

shybutneedinit 47F
83 posts
8/12/2006 9:01 am

Last Read:
8/20/2006 6:17 pm

My so called Life

As my 37th birthday approaches, I find myself wondering what I have accomplished. I mean really accomplished in my life. Its been a rough go, I tell you that. With that said, I guess I really should start from the beginning.

I was born in Toronto, to a native indian mother and an irish father. I was the 3rd child out of 5. From what I gather, my parents had it rough. Anways, I ended up being a crown ward of the province at the age of 3. Now these stories vary on how I ended up there. The story I know is, my mother left us in the care of a babysitter, the babysitter abandoned us, the gas got turned on the stove, and I guess some neighbor called the police/ambulance, and me, brother and sisters were taken. Now like I mentioned, No one knows the true story about how we ended up in Children's aid, except for my parents and the social worker.

Ok so I grew up in care, 8 foster homes in total. I was lucky enough to stay in one home for 8 yrs. From the age of 8 to 16. Only left at 16 because I felt I had no freedom, you know the rebellious teenager lol. I left the care of the childrens aid when I was 18, and moved on my own. I guess I should say, during my stay with the Children's Aid, I was sexually molested when I was 6, never treated/dealt/helped for it, but it also would of helped if I said something. I was at 16 also. With all this happening, just say I was withdrawn, and very cautious of people. So basically I had to grow up much too fast and learn things the hard way about bad people in this world. It was a tough go, but I think I did pretty well. I graduated high school at age 17, kinda did the college thing, a few times... never really finishing what I wanted to, not really knowing why I didn't finish.. fear of committment? who knows.
I want to go back and finish one day, just finding the funds to do it, is my issue now.

So, what have I accomplished? hmmm I have 2 beautiful sons, who are healthy and safe, I graduated high school, I am a survivor of what life has dealt me, and it has been a tough one!

So maybe I have accomplished alot, but days like today when I am deep in thought, it doesn't seem like I have done much with my life. I want to do more, I just need to kickstart myself!

there are my 2 cents for today lol





LustyTaurus 48M  
21253 posts
8/12/2006 10:27 am

That's lot of crap for one little girl...I'm sorry you had to go through all that. I get in a funk some days too wondering what I've really accomplished. From one survivor to another, I hope you have a great day...


shybutneedinit 47F

8/12/2006 11:54 am

    Quoting LustyTaurus:
    That's lot of crap for one little girl...I'm sorry you had to go through all that. I get in a funk some days too wondering what I've really accomplished. From one survivor to another, I hope you have a great day...
thx for the comment.... survivor is the key word.. right.. take care of you.


kagey24 55F
393 posts
8/12/2006 1:46 pm

Wow hun ... that is very traumatic stuff to go through .. I am sooooo sorry you have had to endure such horrific things in your short life !!!

I know about the survival part all to well .. I too am a survivor .. but in a different way !!! My ex killed my mom .. and tried to kill me but I fought him off ... so you are so right .. survival is def the key word !! I have found surrounding yourself with positive people and having a great support system is the best therapy !!

Stay safe and thanks for sharing your story !!

Kissing is my kinda language
{=}

Toronto BBW


shybutneedinit 47F

8/12/2006 1:58 pm

    Quoting kagey24:
    Wow hun ... that is very traumatic stuff to go through .. I am sooooo sorry you have had to endure such horrific things in your short life !!!

    I know about the survival part all to well .. I too am a survivor .. but in a different way !!! My ex killed my mom .. and tried to kill me but I fought him off ... so you are so right .. survival is def the key word !! I have found surrounding yourself with positive people and having a great support system is the best therapy !!

    Stay safe and thanks for sharing your story !!
positive people for sure help, and other survivors help as well, because they know what you had to endure. Thx for the comment and hugssss to you, thanks for sharing as well.

Take care.


SingleWarrior 52M

8/12/2006 2:56 pm

I'd say you accomplished a hell of a lot after going through all of that


lissi888888 52F
1401 posts
8/12/2006 3:15 pm

Shy girlie...

Survive and thrive honey...that's what it's all about. You've done great at both

##

Lis


shybutneedinit 47F

8/12/2006 3:25 pm

    Quoting SingleWarrior:
    I'd say you accomplished a hell of a lot after going through all of that
well thx! I do as well, now that I have had time to think about things.. writing is so good for the soul, and to see clearly. thx for the comment.


shybutneedinit 47F

8/12/2006 5:48 pm

    Quoting lissi888888:
    Shy girlie...

    Survive and thrive honey...that's what it's all about. You've done great at both

    ##

    Lis
trying hun, trying.


rm_octoberman76 40M

8/14/2006 3:55 pm

hey shy girl ...... it is always good to be a survivor , strong and stay on your own feet ..... i always appreciate survivors . i respect them all the way the end . they are like warriors.......... Salute shybut


shybutneedinit 47F

8/14/2006 4:42 pm

Thank you Mz and october for your comments. Appreciate them.


slightpeace946 47M
25 posts
8/20/2006 9:01 am

hey shybut it's edward I just want to say that I 'm sorry for you went through msy you continue your road to recovery


shybutneedinit 47F

8/20/2006 12:36 pm

    Quoting slightpeace946:
    hey shybut it's edward I just want to say that I 'm sorry for you went through msy you continue your road to recovery
thank you Edward for you kind comment.. you are always recovering after you go through something like that. But I am a survivor of a lot of things.


Become a member to create a blog