upfront or put on a front?  

shispook 47F
722 posts
12/6/2005 8:50 am

Last Read:
3/6/2006 1:59 pm

upfront or put on a front?

Do I tell everyone exactly what I think or do I keep my mouth shut?

I think the latter is more suitable, cause all hell would break loose if I showed my true colours.

I can admit to being a devious, manipulative glorified tart here, but as for 'reality' I think I;ll stay as I am. It suits my purpose better. For NOW...

I;m gonna walk out of my job very shortly but I gotta time it right or else I have to write off a pretty substancial sum...so, I keep my mouth shut, have the back up plan organised and sit it out til I;M ready. I;m not gonna screw the guy over or anything, just get what I;m owed and go...BUT I will be leaving thinking I;ve failed, because I haven;t completely done what I set out to do, sure I gained experience, SURE I got paid when others are still owed, but I haven;t managed to turn it around and make it work.

To make it worse, I had a guy in today from our compliance backup and he showed me a world of stuff that I could make use of, and he could see EXACTLY the direction I want to head in, he could see it happening for me, but I wonder could he see in my eyes that I was heartbroken, knowing that in a week or so;s time all this would be irrelevant?

I have a course to attend next week relating to my current job and I have to attend a company thing on Thursday, my dilemma is still, do I?

I WANT to go to both, but as I;ve already stated, it;ll all be pointless if I walk...

In my vanity, I thought I could be the one who, where others failed, be the one who turned this guy around, the potential for the business is there, but I can;t get him to focus, and I ALSO need to get paid...He;s in too deep, I can;t rescue him and for this reason I must go...I tried, hell I tried, noone can question my loyalty... but I loved this industry, (saddo)I am damn good at what I do, and he knows it. Now I have to walk away, gather myself together, go work for a guy who has been after me for months and it will be with a heavy heart. Don;t get me wrong, the new guy is great, I;ll get what I want, what I;m owed and he;ll do it my way...

I just HATE failure....

I guess I STILL haven;t made my mind up if I;m coming or going....

Green_Tea_Boy 50M
1064 posts
12/6/2005 1:49 pm

whoa... heavy decisions.... hard to advise without more background... but I'm sure you've weighed up all the pros and cons.. and whatever you decide you'll make the best of...

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