Other Places Parents Tell Children Where Babies Come From  

sfvppl818 50M/50F
486 posts
5/3/2006 12:47 am

Last Read:
5/3/2006 5:42 am

Other Places Parents Tell Children Where Babies Come From

Babies R Us

The Matrix

Family aisle at Best Buy

South Korean laboratories

Black Market

Sea monkey packet that we "overfed"

Daddy's other baby's momma

"From the cabbage patch" Please Note: if you use this you will have a lot of explaining to do. Today's youngsters are so alienated from the basics of agricultural production that you will have to describe:
a. What a cabbage is in its uncooked, unfrozen, unpicked form
b. The meaning of the word "patch" to refer to a small plot of land devoted to a single crop
c. The meaning of the word "crop"
d. How "land" is used to raise "crops"
e. How a child might be reasonably protected and hidden by the outer leaves of a head of cabbage
f. Who "Topsy" was (if you are silly enough to add, "like Topsy" at the end of "from a cabbage patch"

"When the duck with the green head and the duck with the brown head spend a lot of time together, the duck with the brown head lays eggs"

For boys, Mars. For girls, Venus.

In packs of twelve, from the supermarket.

1-800 number available in the Rolling Stones magazine advertising directory.

The Hurtful Place.

The closet.

The cabbage patch. Alternatively, the running man, or even the robot.

"I don't know you little monster, but if you don't clean up this room, you're going right back!"

Kissing and making out.

That sonofabitch Brad Pitt.

"It's complicated, but basically my wiener hole."

Narnia

The Tooth Fairy, as part of her long-term plan to feed her chronic baby-teeth habit.

The Internet.

Britney Spears.

Yo mamma.


papyrina 51F
21133 posts
5/3/2006 1:46 am

so frightingly true


I'm a

and
i'm here to stay


mundarikos 40M
423 posts
5/3/2006 2:27 am

thanks for the laugh... I hope more people discover your witty and informative blog,you deserve a much wider audience!
thanks, I never knew of the walken for president campaign until i found it here.
thanks for the rest of the reads as well
filakia


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