a little bit about me  

sexyswcalgaryman 34M
0 posts
12/26/2005 5:14 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

a little bit about me


- I once ate a whole live chicken

-I once gave Nexopia User DooGz a videotape of me having sex with his mother, and he told me it was the most beautiful damn thing he ever saw.

-I shed my Skin Once a year

-Like an alligator, I can fully digest a turtle shell

-One Time DooGz took me out to go get a drink with him We go off lookin' for a bar and we can't find one. Finally, DooGz takes me into a vacant lot and says, Here we are!' Well, we sat there for a year and a half. Sure enough, someone constructed a bar around us! Well, the day they opened it, we ordered a shot, drank it and then burnt the place to the ground. I yelled yelled over the roar of the flames, 'Always leave things the way you found them!

-I once once punched a hole in a cow just so I could see who was comin' up the road

-One Time I drank a full glass of liquid LSD with my eggs. Then Islept for eight months straight. When I woke up, I rubbed my eyes and said, 'All in all, I prefer Scotch

-George Lucas got the Idea for 'Star Wars' from listening to me talk in my sleep.

-I love Extension Cords

-I Hate Natives

-And I am Native

-And I hate irony

-It was the sight of my naked body that drove the Beach Boy's Brian Insane.

-I use my own thigh as an Anvil

-I have a toenail at the end of my penis

-I once got my girlfriend pregnant and she gave birth to a delicious 16 oz. steak... The afterbirth was sauteed mushrooms!

-My family crest is a picture of a barracuda eating Much Music's "Rick The Temp"

-If you drop a Phonograph needle on my nipple it plays Dr.Dres "The Chronic"

-All the Slayer album covers are my family photos

-My semin semen can form into a liquid human! ...Like the guy in Terminator 2!

-I think the Iron Man is gay

-I ride upon a steed,per chance to spy a lady.

-I once gave a hand job to a Manta Ray

-I still believe in Santa Claus and I want to put him in porno films.

-I date David Bowie

-I made a time machine out of scrap metal and cigarettes,I traveled back in time to stop the JKF assassination. I caught all 3 of Lee Harvey Oswalds Bullets in my teeth,Kennedys head exploded out of pure amazement.

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