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Taking care of business
Taking care of business
You know, as I meet more and more people through this site, the one thing that is really brought to my attention is how many people have experienced sexless marriages.
You have no idea of how many guys, both here and in the "real world" tell tales of how their wives haven't wanted to have sex with them for 1 year, three years, seven years, even 20 years.
Not only that, but I've been amazed at how many men over 50 tell me that they have never had a blow job, or at least they have never had one to completion.
Then what completely amazes me is that when these guys finally decide that enough is enough, their wives are all sorts of pissed off that the guy wants a divorce.
But the most amazing thing of all is that if people would take care of their sexual needs just as intently as they take care of their other needs, perhaps it wouldn't come to all of that.
I have to admit that I was one of the wives that really wasn't too terribly interested in sex with my husband. But then again, sex had become formulaic...he knew my combination, and there was no excitement to it anymore. And it was sex. No romance, no long tease.
And then when he became unable to get an erection, we had lost the intimacy that might have seen us through the rough times.
You know, if I was rolled over in bed, and my hubby wanted sex, the fastest way to get me to say no was to ask for it bluntly. Now, had he simply put his arms around me, nibbled at my neck, told me how wonderful I was, and caressed me, I would have had the flame kindled, and I would have probably gone for it.
Another thing that would have worked well was if he would have teased me through the day. Make ME want it...enough to make me be the agressor!
I guess I would say to guys out there that still are in a relationship, try to remember how it felt to be in love with this person, and make them remember how it felt to be in love with you.
Take them on a date, treat them like a new lover, flirt over dinner and drinks, try to re-discover the excitement of exploring each other's bodies.
Then tell her that No, you don't have intercourse on the first date, and she's just gonna have to wait! Betcha she can't wait to go for it when you finally give in!
Oh, and one more thing. Guys, learn how to kiss well. We don't need or want a tonsillectomy. There is nothing worse than having a huge tongue shoved into your mouth, and no greater turn-off.
Start with your mouth closed, then gradually let a little tongue slip in. Think of a snake's tongue, how it flicks back and forth, never staying too long in one place.
Another way of thinking about it is to think of entering a woman's pussy. You don't usually just shove it all in at once, you enter gradually, withdrawing, then advancing...until you finally, once your partner is totally receptive, give it your full length.
So there you have it...sexual advice from Rosie. There will be more later!
7/7/2005 7:56 am
Rosie, your husband is or was a fool not to take better care of you. Appreciation of ones spouse is a no brainer in the marriage of two people. I also live in a sexless marriage, but I still appreciate the things that my wife does for me and my family, even though the sex is not there. Keep up the great blog!!|
P.S. Hopefully you and I will meet someday.
7/7/2005 6:44 pm
thanks, rosie......good advice|
7/15/2005 6:10 pm
In response and reference to entering a womans pussy...first, for the ladies...it's in REALLY poor taste for a woman to respond during sex "Give it ALL to me now" and directly follow with "Oh!..you are!"...and another little dating tip, NEVER offer him a breath mint after having recieved oral from him..it's kind of a mood killer.... Ciao cutie!...talk to ya' soon|