"Secret Lovers" Wed...  

rm_unlistedone 65M
3832 posts
11/26/2005 9:34 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

"Secret Lovers" Wed...

This was in AP News, and I thought it was kinda neat. Names have been changed, to protect the innocent.

Perhaps sometimes, we don't appreciate everything we have with our partner. Sometimes, perhaps our partner should take a look at what they have... or had. unlisted

70 Years Later, 'Secret Lovers' Still Wed

-- When 19-year-old Ray fell in love with
14-year-old Mary, doubters said it would never last -- they were just too far apart in age. But the young couple didn't listen, spiriting from their home town to a one nearby to get married in secret. On Saturday, the Smith's will celebrate their 70th wedding anniversary.

He's 90 and she's 85, both in good health. And the romance that began so long ago is far from losing its luster.

"I still love him so much," Mary told us. "When
we go to bed at night, we always hold hands. 'I love you' are the last words we say to each other."

Their wedding anniversary has fallen on Thanksgiving seven times since their wedding in 1935.

"We're thankful to have had all these years together," Ray said. "We had no idea that it would last this long."

When they started dating, he worked at a meat market for a dollar a day, and she worked at a drug store for 10 cents an hour. One of Ray's duties was delivering ice, and Mary would leave the icebox open -- letting the precious ice melt -- so he'd have to come by more often.

He proposed in a letter, and Mary's response was simple.

"I wrote back and said, 'Yes, yes, yes,'" she said. "We had a friend drive us to nearby town to get married so it wouldn't be in the paper in our home town. We didn't want anyone to know because I was so young. My folks were really put out when they found out, but in those days, they wanted kids to leave home because money was so scarce. It was one less mouth to feed."

The newlyweds moved in with Ray's father and stepmother in blogville, where Ron worked as a dishwasher and part-time cook. Eventually, Mary's aunt offered her a job at a bakery in another town, and the couple moved.

By then, they had their first child, a boy they named Mac. The place where they lived in that town was so small that the kitchen, bed and shower were all in one room.

"I worked nights and slept days," Ray said. "When the baby cried, I could reach out and rock him without getting out of bed."

"He made $15 a week," Mary added. "We never went anywhere because we couldn't afford it. The grocer let us charge $5 a week, and he'd throw in a box of candy. That was the only treat we ever got.

Water was drawn from a pump, which often froze in the winter. The weather would turn so cold that the nails on the inside of the house would be covered in frost, and without money for blankets the Smith's stuffed newspaper in the bed for insulation.

After three years in that town, they moved to a larger city, with Mary little more than a teenager.

"Mom made me clothes from hand-me-downs that had come from my aunt's," their daughter said. "And those were clothes they'd received from their cousins."

Though their daughter often had to put cardboard in the soles of her shoes because of holes, she never felt poor, she said.

"We had the love of our parents, and they made a beautiful, loving home for us," she said.

For all but those first 14 years of her life, Mary said, they've never been apart. Now they live in another city, close to their children.

"People don't say 'Ray and Mary.' They say 'Ray-Mary' because we're always together," she said. "Sometimes I worry about which one of us will go first. I tell him he's not going anywhere without me."

sassybelle21 32F
13313 posts
11/26/2005 9:55 am

that's so touching if only i could have a man for that long till i die.

Synn74 42F
1206 posts
11/26/2005 10:35 am

ohh what a beautiful sweet story.. thank you for sharing..

I welcome you to the House of Syn...

_Safira 53F
11260 posts
11/26/2005 6:40 pm

Dear Unlisted ~

What a truly heartwarming story.

I had a great-aunt and -uncle who were together for 75+ years. On their 75th wedding anniversary we had this huge party, which culminated in church services at their church on a particular Sunday. When the preacher asked how they had managed to stay together for so long my Great Aunt Mary (coincidence) spoke right up. (BIG surprise there. )

She said, "Well when we got married the preacher said, 'Both of you make a list of ten things that no matter what the other does it doesn't count 'cause it's on your list.' So every time John would do something wrong, I'd always say, 'You better be glad that's on my list!'"

There was much laughter with those two ... always. They typified a wonderful, working relationship between two people on so many different levels. I loved them both very much ... and they all of us.

I actually wrote a sermon based on their relationship for that church service, which later became the basis of many "nondenominational" weddings with which I helped. It's entitled "The Value of Love". Perhaps that will make its way into Blogland someday.

Warmest regards, my friend ...


This is my blog - Comes With Warning Labels. There are many like it, but this one is mine.

RECOMMENDED READING: A F F ... The Only Site For Me?

rm_unlistedone 65M
2718 posts
11/26/2005 9:46 pm

Sassybelle... keep the faith. I would think that with your intelligence, personality, and looks, there will be plenty of guys willing to fill this order for you.

Stop by anytime. I enjoy your blog. unlisted

rm_unlistedone 65M
2718 posts
11/26/2005 9:55 pm

Synn, you're welcome.
I figured most of my readers would like it. Come back by anytime. unlisted

rm_lovelyLady 64F
434 posts
11/26/2005 10:00 pm

Wow, what a touching and wonderful story... 70 years! That's hard to imagine these days, other than in my dreams... I remember going to my grandparents Golden Anniversary celebration when I was 9. At the time I thought that was normal... Because that close loving family life was the kind I grew up in and saw around me, my friends and family... Little did I know how extraordinary that kind of friendship and devotion is.......

Thanks for sharing that lovely story...

XOXO's to you...... LL

rm_unlistedone 65M
2718 posts
11/26/2005 10:00 pm

Safira, thank you for sharing this about your aunt and uncle.

Ten things on the list, huh? What a fabulous idea! I wish I had tried that when I first got married. Perhaps I can still make a list.

I would be very interested in your sermon. Would you either put it up on your blog or send it to me by email?

warm hug to you, unlisted

rm_unlistedone 65M
2718 posts
11/26/2005 10:15 pm

Lovely, that's pretty much how I grew up too. A different world now, I think... where this is the exception; not the rule.

LOL... living on love!!! (this one was easy!)

Big hug, unlisted

20sQldCpl 106M/106F

11/27/2005 7:40 pm

Just stopped by to have a peep and saw this so I had to comment. It's so sweet and inspiring to read stories like this one. There's an ad on tv here for pay tv (I think) and it shows a bride and groom standing at the altar with the preacher. Preacher's saying "Will you take this woman, knowing you have 30 days to reconsider?... I do. Will you take this man, knowing you can leave at any time?... I do." I think it's sad because no doubt one day this is possibly what a wedding will sound like, that there may be a "cooling off period" like there is when you buy a car. I think people who actually believe in marriage have become a minority, that the true meaning is being lost. Maybe the only place that this love exists now days is in Hollywood, I hope not.

rm_unlistedone 65M
2718 posts
11/28/2005 1:14 am

True, Polly. But it is nice when everything works out.

Went to a party the other week for two of my friends... fifty-four years together. (And they still playfully talk trash to each other!)

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