Married Men Emails  

rm_txrose4uNTX 57F
5791 posts
7/6/2005 11:50 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Married Men Emails

I am sorry... I am a single woman... hear me roar!!! lol.... I just don't get what the married men are after....or what they are thinking when they send emails out like these.... I didn't respond to them, but my knee-jerk thoughts are directed direclty below each email wording. (Names have been left out to protect them, but they know who they are!) BTW, these are just a day or two sampling in my email basket.....


”would you be interested in a married guy?”

Look, if you have to ask, the answer is going to be no!!


“I tried to send an email earlier but was not sure if it went thru. I am very interested in learning more about you. Please read thru my profile and if there is an interest I will be more than happy to share a pic. Do you have one of your face? As you can imagine, I am a little nervous about sending my pic all over the internet.
Let me know.”

I bet you are nervous about sending your pic all over the internet; if you are married, do you think I would want my picture on your computer when the attorneys request all computers be inventoried and examined???


“This my dear, is a no-brainer. This is how I see it. Those who say that marriage is a 50/50 proposition are doomjed to failure - period. Why? No one ever crosses the line to make u[ the difference! To make it work, someone must always cross over the line (and it is often not the same partner) to make 100 percent. Fifty/fifty is doomed to ffailure - you can never reach morer than halfway - and that is often where your true Love is!
I am a romantic At Heart”

Not in my book, buddy! In my book, each partner gives his/her own 150% plus into the relationship and not rely on just settling for 50/50. I don’t want an average marriage that could be doomed for failure ‒ and I don’t want to be pulling the weight of the relationship, nor do I expect him to. If you are married and looking, what do you know about the philosophy of true love??? And, if you are giving you 40-60 to marriage relationship, does that mean that you have only 10% to give to your Mistress???? hmmmm.....

“if you are looking for 1 on 1with a man who is looking for some one like you ... just let me know when...”

I am sorry… what is wrong with a little 1 on 1 with your wife????

If you are a married man, looking for some action, please don't be offended by what I have posted here. But, you have GOT to see how it sounds to some single women.


rm_txrose4uNTX 57F
3289 posts
7/11/2005 10:30 am

yagottalikit - (*whispering back -- yes, I think you are right.... that is what I remember as well... *)

alice593 - Well, first of all, I am a firm believer that I don't think 2 wrongs make a right... however, to each his own. I have a lot of male friends b/c I find them less catty than my female friends AND I know a lot of males that have lots more females friends b/c they seem to understand women more. Whatever the case, it certainly takes a lot of soul searching. I am not telling you to not pursue AdultFriendFinder or other women by any means; after all, I have been the mistress of several married men in my lifetime. And, sometimes, I have had sex with my male friends to see if there was anything more possibly there. Sex is a glorious act that we can express to one another....just make sure that you take into considerations of all the emotions involved when you do..... (wait! Did that make any sense at all? I am soooo very sleepy and still haven't been to bed after my 24hr shift ended more than 4 hours ago. I reserve the right to re-explain that thought later, in case, it made no sense whatsoever!! )

alice593 71M

7/10/2005 11:05 am

txrose4uNTX, I think you are write. I am one of those whom you are talking about. For me, it wasn't even easy writing a profile about being married, and wanting some extra woman friend to have sex with. Even though my wife had an affair, and told me about it. We talked and agreed that I could have affairs also, to equalize the situation. But not having done this before, it is quite unsettling at times to me. Even with her permission. I got to meet someone, but in kidding about her pictures, she took it personal. I even told her I was kidding. This was for friendship only. I felt lousy, that I caused her to feel bad. Neither one of us was doing well at the time as it was. It just made both of us feel worse. I'm just thinking, that maybe I should just not even try to do what I hated to do in the first place; and that is having an affair. Maybe I shouldn't even try to befriend another woman, even without the thought of sex.

yagottalikit 49F
583 posts
7/10/2005 5:03 am

(whispering so I don't alert the AdultFriendFinder Gods) I can read profiles, just fine.....just can't see big pictures.

Yagotta get it soft and wet so we can kick/stick it

rm_txrose4uNTX 57F
3289 posts
7/8/2005 2:01 pm

4nik8_4u - Don't worry... there are some married men I have enjoyed getting the emails from. And, I have agreed to meet one once who, I think had a sudden conscience about his wife, which was the reason he had no-called, no showed... and, I agreed to meet another -- which was wonderful a couple of times, although finding a shedule around his wife was totally unpredictable. I just reallized recently that I want and desire better than just be the second rate person. He was my first live AdultFriendFinder encounter, but was certainly not my last, albeit probably my last married AdultFriendFinder encounter (or at least that I know of); some of these other guys that I have met may have been married; however, I have generally found most AdultFriendFinder men that I finally break down and meet to be very interesting and honest. Funny. Just as I am writing this blog comment to you, the AdultFriendFinder married guy is IMg me. He mainly does that when it is convenient for him. Right now, there is only one person that I am soooo very excited about seeing.

rm_4nik8_4u 61M
2501 posts
7/8/2005 11:34 am

Gee, I thought I had all the good e-mails! I see I've been outdone by better men. Really I do understand where you're coming from(no pun). But the problem isn't really married men as much as it is people who ignore the wishes of the person they contact. When a person states that they are straight, gays or bisexuals do not need to contact them. When a person says no one over 50 yrs old, no one over fifty should contact them. It goes on and on with preferences. Preferences that should be respected. Do consider that standard members can't read profiles so have a level of understanding for that. Silver and gold members have no excuses. With all that said, I glad I didn't e-mail you!!!lol

rm_txrose4uNTX 57F
3289 posts
7/8/2005 9:05 am

74ShovelHD - Back to my statement.... It isn't so much about the married men issue.... but so much as what they say in their emails. I love having you read my blogs... and bantering with you.... Look forward to more in the future!!

74ShovelHD 53M

7/7/2005 10:10 pm

Hmmmmm... many good points here. Being married, I have to add my 2 cents...

As stated here and many other places, there are numerous reasons for married men and women to be on here. Our marriages have become stale and lacking excitment (which doesn't always mean lacking sex). We come on this site to visit with our peers, kind of like free (or as a paying member, low cost) therapy.

Speaking for myself, I married young, and as we've aged, my wife and I have grown in different directions. We are committed to each other and our kids, but our interests are far apart. I come to this site for the stimulation. I enjoy the interaction, the flirting, etc. I do read profiles carefully and for the most part avoid singles (with the exception of my blogging friends that I do have fun chatting with!!). But mostly I contact other married women that are in the same situation as myself, more for conversation than the physical contact, because I actually do get that at home.

I realize that to most singles out there, my feelings may not make sense, but for many of us, we feel something is missing, and divorce is not an option, and a long term marriage shouldn't be destroyed because of sexual fliring!!

I do not fear being caught here. My only fear is that I'll find someone that I feel is "the one". THAT would be a problem!

I do need to add one other comment... I always respect the profiles that say "no married men" (but I do send a comment it they have a nice profile), but some members here go overboard on that they are disgusted with married men on here.... I wonder why this is, since this is a "sex and swingers" site.

rm_txrose4uNTX 57F
3289 posts
7/7/2005 11:50 am

talldarkavg1 - You might have to take that up with my Beau...

rm_txrose4uNTX 57F
3289 posts
7/7/2005 11:48 am

avgjoe19602 - "Loyalty within a marriage relationship really ends when either partner refuses to make an attempt to meet the needs of their partner." This is an interesting comment. I certainly respect you and others that are in such a predictament. I love you, Joe, as a great friend indeed and hope that you would never take that away from me. That would certainly make for a great blog discussion - at what point do you call it quits in a LTR b/c of sexual needs are not met -- or, rather do you stay in a LTR and find someon else to meet your needs, or just call the marriage quits completely so that you can once seek out a more compatible relationship as a single men. Who was it who was on here and went back to his wife b/c she had finally changed her meds which gave her her sex drive back???? I agree there are all sorts of reasons for seeking Short-term or Long-term relationships outside of a marriage. I am interested in being friends with you all definately... and can be one of your best and trusted friends, but I wouldn't condone a sexual relationship -- unless you divorced your wife first!!! ANYHOW..... Things to think about for a future blog....

BTW, came up with your new name yet????


rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
7/7/2005 10:54 am

Rose you're a lot stronger than me! I get down right pissed when married men email me.

Some married men are such creeps that they just cannot possibly understand fidelity. Others are in open relationships where their mate may date also. Whatever the situation, I thought the point of your blog was questioning why married men disrespect your wishes and contact you anyway.

You have my word...if you marry me, I won't email you!

[blog talldarkavg1]

rm_txrose4uNTX 57F
3289 posts
7/7/2005 9:46 am

ByteChaser2 - The thing is.... does the last little paragraph in your profile work -- or are you still getting the unsolicited mail???? I am wondering if I get curt in my profile, if they will even read it -- thinking "Well, maybe she doesn't know me. Maybe she'll give me a chance because I am perfect for her!!" ... lol..

A class in marketing may be what is in order here!! lol....



ByteChaser2 53M

7/7/2005 7:50 am

Oddly enough, I'm not offended in the least. But I do agree with IPman in that we each are here for one reason or another - some honorable, some justifiable and yes, some morally ambiguous at best.

I do have to chuckle though at the thought of [not just married men] anyone who'd make those overtures to people who obviously don't have any interest in them. It's happened to me on countless occasions - gay and bi men sending me emails, ergo the last little paragraph in my own profile -

I guess the point is, why move away from your target audience and waste valuable time when the obvious answer will most often be rejection? Example... my target audience are married or otherwise attached women and only rarely singles or unattached (and then only if there's an obvious indication by them that they would consider seeing/meeting married men alone).

Maybe these guys should take a class on marketing?

Great post Rose! XX

rm_txrose4uNTX 57F
3289 posts
7/7/2005 7:49 am

nedthebundler - And, they certainly have.....

wyvernrose - Well... Beau and I were talking and we might visit you two someday....

IPman - lol... No, you have not offended me. I am just humored by the married men emails. Do they not realize how they sound when they write their emails???? I have made no bones about it and have responded to many of their emails in the past by stating that "I am not interested in dating married men because I would want soooooo much more out of the relationship than to be just a #2 woman". I am honest and upfront with my feelings towards them. I don't mind talking to them as friends though even about sex.... and I have had fun with bantering with them on the blog..... but, come on guys, if you are married, even being on this site, you have to know the risks you are taking in contacting single women. Speaking as a single, widowed woman, many single women aren't looking for just sex with just anyone they can get hold of....they are, very often, looking forward to a more meaningful relationship with someone who enjoys sex as much as or more than themselves. This site lends itself to that. I have tried to be the "other woman" but I don't like being only at their beck and call where their wives are away and when it is convenient for them to see me. I don't handle that well. And, now I am quite possibly moving into a LTR relationship with my Beau which will have a lot of new ideas and directions for us to explore as we harness our own relationship. In a LTR or married relationship, I would never dream of having an enounter outside our relationship, unless it is with my LTR partner beside me -- and, even then, it will only be after a degree of trust is built to make us very secure in our very own relationship which Beau and I have also discussed. So you see, IPman, this blog isn't about excluding the married men from AdultFriendFinder, but rather bringing to their attention some of the pet peaves that single women have about being contacted by married men, as well as silly as they sound in their emails. I know it can't be easy devising emails that sound okay, but pahhhhhleassssee.....

IPman 61M
313 posts
7/7/2005 6:16 am

Dear Txrose 4u in Tx,

OK I will try not to be offended by your blog as a married man on here (although honestly I am)

Rather than defend why a married man or married woman might be on this site (there are a whole host of reasons) many of which are ethical and many that are not.

I wonder why you would post a blog denouncing the men who are married and then at the end of the blog ask them not to be offended. You have all the right in the world to write about whatever moves you, however, please don’t ask to be absolved of any responsibility once you write it.

One of the best things about AdultFriendFinder for me is that this is a community of sexual active folks that are incredibly different. The differences are geographic, political, economic, and what unites everyone on this site is an interest in sex. It’s the differences in sexual taste, partner preference that I think make this place cool. I guess TX I prefer to celebrate the differences rather than denounce them.

I hope that you don't delete my comment from your blog. Just my two cents, I do hope I have not offended you. Thanks

wyvernrose 38F
3895 posts
7/7/2005 1:53 am

So I am guessing you would say the same to Boney should he contact you or a gentleman in a similar relationship would do likewise?


nedthebundler 56M/59F

7/7/2005 12:12 am

Hello txrose,

Had to respond to this one, too good to pass up.....If you have put a line in your profile that says "not interested in married men" it's kind of like posting a "wet paint" know some people take it as a personal challenge......

Madness takes its toll. Exact change please!

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