true stories  

rm_tinkRbell05 46F
18 posts
1/11/2006 6:20 am

Last Read:
6/22/2006 12:06 pm

true stories

Isnt it funny how some people can be???

True Doctor Stories

A man comes into the ER and yells

"My wife's going to
have her baby in the
cab!" I grabbed my stuff,
rushed out to the cab,
lifted the lady's --Dress,

and began to take off her

underwear. Suddenly I
noticed that there were
several cabs, and I was in the wrong one.


At the beginning of my shift
I placed a stethoscope on
an elderly and
slightly deaf female patient's

anterior chest wall.
Big breaths," I
instructed. Yes, they used to be,"
replied the patient.

One day I had to be the bearer
of bad news when I told
a wife that her
husband had died of a massive
myocardial infarct. Not
more than five minutes
later, I heard her reporting
to the rest of the family
that he had died of a

"massive internal fart."


I was performing a complete physical,

including the

visual acuity test. I
placed the patient twenty
feet from the chart and
began, "Cover your right
eye with your hand." He read
the 20/20 line perfectly.
Now your left."
Again, a flawless read Now both,"
I requested. There
was silence. He
couldn't even read the
large E on the top line. I

turned and discovered that
he had done exactly what

I had asked; he was standing
there with both his
eyes covered. I was laughing
too hard to finish the exam.

During a patient's two week
follow-up appointment with
his cardiologist, he
informed me, his doctor,

that he was having trouble
with one of his
medications. Which one?"
I asked. The patch. The nurse
told me to put on a
new one every six hours and

now I'm running out of
places to put it!" I had
him quickly undress and
discovered what I hoped I

wouldn't see. Yes, the man had over fifty patches on
his body! Now the

instructions include removal of

the old patch before applying a new one.


While acquainting myself with
a new elderly patient, I
asked, "How long have
you been bed-ridden?"
After a look of complete
confusion she answered.

Why, not for about twenty years
-- when my husband was alive."


I was caring for a woman from Kentucky and asked,
So, how's your breakfast this morning?"
It's very good, except for the Kentucky

Jelly. I can't seem to get used to the taste,"
the patient replied. I then asked to see the
jelly and the woman produced a foil packet
labeled "KY Jelly."


A new, young MD doing his
residency in OB was quite
embarrassed performing
female pelvic exams. To cover
his embarrassment he had
unconsciously formed<>
a habit of whistling softly.

The middle aged lady upon whom
he was performing this
exam suddenly burst
out laughing and further
embarrassed him. He looked up
from his work and
sheepishly said, "I'm sorry.
Was I tickling you?"

She replied, "No doctor,
but the song you were

whistling was 'I wish I was
an Oscar Meyer Wiener."


Efilnikufecin69 47M

1/11/2006 8:03 am

GeilDA 41M

2/11/2006 4:10 am

melde dich mal

GeilDA 41M

2/11/2006 4:54 am

Schau mal hier du S√úSSE

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