A man  

rm_tastee1966 50M
41 posts
2/17/2006 9:44 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

A man

I've been told by many women that they are surprised at the amount of dedication I put into ensuring a pleasurable experience for them. Funny, I always assumed all men did the same as I. Well, let me then offer some suggestions as to what a man needs to do for any woman.
First of all, well scrubbed is the rule of the day. Get clean, and not with that girly perfumed body wash. Use a good anti-bacterial soap to ensure you have no remaining body odor. And don't forget that often overlooked area below your scrotum; the one that always seems to attract 'crotch lint'. If you wish to splash on a little bit of your lady's favorite scent (ask her, don't assume she likes what you like), feel free to do it after you are clean.
Next thing is to ensure that you are freshly and cleanly shaven, unless you have a full beard. The last thing a woman wants is your stubble running up and down between her legs. And remember to thoroughly brush those teeth.
Another important item is hands and fingers. Oh boy, the stories I've heard about that. Believe it or not, an ocassional professional manicure wouldn't hurt. You need to keep those fingernails trimmed back past the point of the finger tips, and ensure there are no sharp corners or edges. And, if you are like me, you need to use a good moisturizing hand cream on a daily basis to ensure your callouses don't get too rough. Anything coming in contact with a woman's vagina should be as soft as possible. And smokers, listen up. Nicotine burns! Try rubbing your eye right after smoking a cigarette and see how it feels. Not very pleasant, eh? Scrub your hands very, very thoroughly with hot soapy water. Then rinse repeatedly until there is no nicotine odor or stain.
Once you have taken care of all the aforementioned hygeine issues, you are ready for your lover. Now, even women who like to be submissive and have the man do everything will be particular in how they want you to perform oral sex. If she's not saying anything about the quality of your technique, that is NOT a good thing. I have never gotten bad feedback on oral sex, only good. That's because women don't like to make us feel like we don't know what the hell we're doing if at all possible. Most women will rather not tell you when you are doing a bad or so-so job, so be sure to ask them what exactly you need to be doing to hit it right.
And, ladies, feedback is important. If you want good oral, don't be afraid to demand of your man that he make any necessary changes in his technique. I don't care how good a guy thinks he is at 'eating pussy', he's never as good as he could be. All that is required is to ask the lady if there is anything that can be done to make it better. And then listen to what she says, she knows better than the man what is likely to feel good.
Last, but certainly not least, put her pleasure first. Most men have a fairly limited 'supply' at hand, and it is wise to conserve it where possible. I've heard that a man can fully 'recharge' in about 20 minutes, but that probably only applies to horny 18 year olds. Generally, the vast majority of us can get it about two to three times in the course of a night under the most ideal circumstances. And, the interest in pleasing the other seems to wane after the first or second time.
Make sex about her. Encourage the use of toys, these will enhance her experience and make things a little easier for you. Find out from her all the spots of her body that she likes to have kissed. Then, spend at least an hour going over those spots again and again with your mouth. Tease her; make love to her, but do not ejaculate. Concentrate on what makes her moan, not what makes you moan. Women love being caressed and kissed almost as much as penetration, if it's done right. Talk to her, tell her how beautiful she is, how she makes you feel, how you're going to make her feel. If she wants to perform oral on you, fine. But do not ask her to, as that is putting the focus back on pleasing the man. Always, always, do what makes HER feel good.
By keeping these simple rules in mind, men, you can ensure that your lady will keep coming back time and again for sex. And believe me, the better you make it for her, the better it will ultimately be for you.
*I can only say that some of us remain clueless.

SweetSouthrnGrl 44F

2/17/2006 10:43 am


Thank you...there is hope for the male species. If only the majority of men took your approach to intimate interludes.

Best wishes on your quest...

Sweet thoughts,

SlimGoodGuy 38M

2/17/2006 10:50 am

I don't want to distract from the topic of your blog today, but you started off advocating antibacterial soap. Those antibacterial soaps are becoming less recommended as they increase resistance by very common bacteria resulting in infections we cannot manage. Everyone jumped on the antibacterial soap bandwagon when they were introduced. I even used those soaps. Some say they don't really clean much better than other soap and let's face it, most people either overuse it or don't wash properly to begin with. It's been a common topic of discussion amongst my fellow medical professionals over the last year or so. We are having more difficulty in treating several infections. Help us docs out a little bit eh? A related issue involves not finishing the course of antibiotics prescribed for your infections which also leads to increased resistance. If they prescribe an antibiotic, take them all as prescribed. Don't stop taking them because you feel better. Finish the bottle as the prescription indicates.

As for the nicotine burns, I'll have to take your word for it. I've never been a smoker. I only know the effects smoking has on your body and any kind of contact sensitivity related to nicotine has never been mentioned.

Some kind of mention of safe sex might have been a good idea somewhere in your blog, but it's your topic, so write what you want. I would have included some kind of "be prepared" advisory. If a woman is not comfortable unless some kind of protection is used, do it. Women, if you have any doubts, speak up about it. Men, listen to them.

I would also add something for the men. Guys, don't think too much. Thinking too much will slow things down turning sex into work and just plain boring for her and maybe even frustrating for both of you. Go in knowing what you want to do and how you do it. I do agree with tastee1966 in that I assumed most men did the same things I did. Don't try to tackle everything at once. Relax and try and make these things natural for you. Also remember that there is always room to learn. Talk about things after sex with your woman and ladies, don't be too harsh. Just give constructive criticism because being too harsh on his performance could simply kill it on the spot and that's all she wrote. Sex isn't about just what the man does. It's how both of you interact together.

mysteriesofme 44F

2/17/2006 10:56 am

you are tastee.. {=}

countrypassion2 54F
26 posts
2/17/2006 11:39 am

Wow tastee, you are sweet.. Nice blog. You are right a woman loves being caressed. And if the attention is on her, she is more likely to relax and feel uninhibited when it comes to oral on her guy.. Just a few points to ponder guys!

SlimGoodGuy 38M

2/17/2006 11:46 am

Let me rephrase my comment on nicotine and irritation. While the nicotine patch, for example, is known to cause irritation and burning on the skin, contact with hands and fingers of smokers has not been cited as resulting in irritation or burning.

WildChild5884 32F

2/17/2006 8:49 pm

Great post! Definitely wouldn't hurt the guys to pay attention to this one.

horatio1815 46M/35F

2/18/2006 1:05 pm

will you marry me????



2/18/2006 7:49 pm

I think the bit about commuication concerning oral sex is quite pertinent to developing that area to an unbeleivable degree.

Something I did with the last girlfriend I had. And oral sex was not the only arena in which we did that with astounding success so that approach appplies just as well to any other aspect of lovemaking.

You could probably take nearly any couple who is not so happy with the sex thay are having and trace the reasons for that to either bad communication or no communication at all.

The potential for a couple to develop the teamwork of this type is so high that it seems few couples ever really even get to the tip of the iceberg but if you ever can the sex that then grows from that is often truly from another planet.

And tastee if your posts were oral sex and I were a woman I'd suggest that you start using paragraph breaks for easier and more pleasurable readblitity.

Good post!


rm_tastee1966 50M
5 posts
2/19/2006 8:59 am

I tried, but for some reason, when the blog gets posted, it's without paragraph breaks. No indents either.

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