The Role Of Beards VS Clean Shaven In History  

rm_talldarkavg1 105M
15586 posts
9/15/2005 12:47 pm
The Role Of Beards VS Clean Shaven In History

OK...I really did my best to behave and it's lasted well over 10 minutes or so. But I just have to talk about something, beards in religion and in history versus the clean shaven face.

It starts with the word barber. The origin of the word is the Latin word Barba, meaning...you guessed it, beard. Let's look into this a bit more shall we?

It goes back a few years back to when the planet was co-inhabited by Homo Sapiens and Neanderthals. There are a jillion silly theories out there as to exactly what happened to the dim-witted Neanderthals and each is as seemingly believable as the next. They're all full of crap. I know the answer!

Although bumpily of brow, the Neanderthals were actually the smarter of the two breeds. They recognized a need to maintain a clean shaven face for sanitary purposes, the attraction of the opposite sex, and saw it as an opportunity to market grooming products. They started the whole clean shaven face thing. Unfortunately, they figured shaving could be accomplished by bashing a large jagged rock into the face. The rest is history. Homo Sapiens survived. And so did the beard.

It wasn't until about 200 years ago that Popes began shaving. Look at the Greek Orthodox Priests, mucho long beards. The Muslims, mucho long beards. The Hasidic Jews, mucho long beards and mucho longer sideburns. The Group ZZ Top, 2 out of 3 mucho long beards. Married Amish, mucho long beards. The list goes on and on. It seems a beard is somehow associated with holy.

Or is it? Maybe it isn't that beards are holy...maybe it's that the cutting devices are evil. A straight razor, great for shaving. Horrible in someone else's hand in a dark alley. Safety razors. Great for cutting whiskers, horrible on skin. Nair...this stuff is horrible both on your face and your testicles. You see, cutting devices are evil.

Here's more proof. I just heard that another super safety razor is coming out. This sucker has 5 blades in the front and one on the back for trimming. I guess more blades means better. Then why 5? I use the current 4 blade state-of-the-art vibrating razor. Now I'm thinking I'd feel smoother shaven with 10 or 11 blades. Maybe even a deli-style shaver. One you put you head on and just start whacking. That ought to do it.

Maybe just electrolysis at birth. No more nothing ever again!


[blog talldarkavg1]


rm_DaphneR 58F
7938 posts
9/15/2005 1:03 pm

Why not a weed wacker? You could shave and take care of the lawn all at the same time.

Have tongue, will use it. Repeatedly.


HardlyYours4Now 52M

9/15/2005 1:07 pm

My goatee is here to stay. I don't care how many blades you send at it.

Some say it is there to cover a weak chin. I'll have you know that my chin can bench-press more than I can with my arms. And you don't want to run into my chin in a dark alley. Even if you have a straight razor.


BLONDENEEDSSEX 57F

9/15/2005 1:25 pm

Try shaving what we women have to then come back and tell us your woes lol


rm_saintlianna 45F
15466 posts
9/15/2005 1:34 pm

You look like Osama Bin Lunatic.


rm_dandth 48M/38F
173 posts
9/15/2005 1:41 pm

Ok (the male half here commenting), I went to get the new and improved laser guided electrolisys on my neck and cheeks so when I forgot to shave, I would just end up with a neatly trimmed beard. The guy tells me there will be a slight sting when they actually burn the hair out of my neck. Slight sting!!!????!!!!???? Like the slight suffocating feeling you get when a Tahoe gets parked on your chest! They gave me two number 3 Penn tennis balls to squeeze in each hand. I popped both like balloons from squeezing with the pain. Now, I know some chicks out there think all men are pussies and can't handle pain, but in the next room was a young lady that had fallen so in love with her brazilian snooker-doodle, she wanted it made permanently bare. She screamed. She screamed and she cussed. The only people who can truly tolerate this are the men who have no testosterone and women getting their legs done.

The short term results after 3 visits were supperb by the way. My neck had NO bumps AT ALL, and no hair. 6 months later, 80% of it came back. I guess I'm too close to the original neanderthals to be bare.

I hear there are men that actually get this done to their balls? I would think someone lacking enough feeling in their nether regions to survive this, wouldn't care to have it done since sex would be useless to them and their 4 acive nerve endings.


rm_luke69iner 48M
3275 posts
9/15/2005 1:55 pm

I'll shave you if you'll shave me Blonde ... my face that is ... you can just shave my face ... on second thought nevermind Mr. Snuffleupagus is getting worried


S'io credesse che mia risposta fosse
A persona che mai tornasse al mondo,
Questa fiamma staria senza piu scosse.
Ma perciocche giammai di questo fondo
Non torno vivo alcun, s'i'odo il vero,
Senza tema d'infamia ti rispondo
.
~Dante~


TheQuietGuy2005 54M
2386 posts
9/15/2005 1:56 pm

You know, Tall, I far prefer Mzhunyhole to you! MY beard stays!!


rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/15/2005 2:10 pm

LOL Daphne...think about what you just said...you're going to put a weed wacker in MY hands?

[blog talldarkavg1]


rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/15/2005 2:15 pm

Hardly...it's not that I didn't believe you...but I checked with the AlleyAssassins web site...sure enough, right there on page 2 was a photo of your chin with a universal don't through it. I applaud you!

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rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/15/2005 2:16 pm

If I take that beard off Huny...want a rub from it?

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rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/15/2005 2:17 pm

Black...yeouch...you're telling me?

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rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/15/2005 2:19 pm

Blonde...I use a safety razor and still go through a half roll of toilet paper on the cuts. If I had to shave my legs or cooter...I'd bleed to death.

[blog talldarkavg1]


rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/15/2005 2:19 pm

Saint...so is that a thumbs up?

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rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/15/2005 2:22 pm

Dandth...where can I get one of those ball jobs? Sounds like that's a lot better eye opener than caffiene!

[blog talldarkavg1]


rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/15/2005 2:25 pm

Luke...I'll take photos.

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TopFisher 63M

9/15/2005 3:39 pm

Blonde,

I'm guilty as hell. I have indeed shaved kitty before, (SCARES THE HELL OUTTA ME TO! When you shave yourself you can feel the blade and pressure and such, when it's somebody else, Well it juust scares me is all.

Though gives me a hard on the size of a baseball bat too!!!


rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/15/2005 4:00 pm

Have to agree with you there Quiet. I prefer her to me as well.

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rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/15/2005 4:00 pm

Jiggly...top & bottom? You date monks with bald butts?

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rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/15/2005 4:04 pm

YIKES! Fisher...I've been to Louisville...that sucker has to be 10 stories! I am truly impressed.

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RailBaron2 54M

9/15/2005 5:27 pm

Sorry My Beard Stays in winter & my sideburns & moustache stay in Spring & summer. I shaved my face for 16 months for 1 ungratefull woman, NEVER AGAIN!


demonicsexkitten 41F
10671 posts
9/15/2005 6:31 pm

To all the men keeping their beards: Yaaay (well, i love facial hair. morning stubble for those who shave. though clean shaven is good on the right guy... sigh).


mzlola 54F

9/15/2005 7:21 pm

i think a nice flavor savor or a soulpatch is the best of both worlds although I dont know any woman that would turn down a good old fashion mustache ride mmmm these are a few of my favorite things sorry made me so happy to think about it i had to break out in song lol

Thanks for your prayers my son is home from Iraq


AlbertPrince 58M

9/16/2005 4:55 am

If the 5th blade "cuts you closer" why bother with the first 4?


rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/16/2005 5:07 am

Baron...get outta town...an ungrateful woman? LMAO...let the assault begin.

[blog talldarkavg1]


rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/16/2005 5:08 am

Kitten, what's your position on pubic stubble?

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rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/16/2005 5:09 am

LMAO...made ya sing did it Lola?

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rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/16/2005 5:11 am

Honni...clean shaven...hairy chest...no back hair...I qualify!

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rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/16/2005 6:32 am

Albert...great point! Hmmm, maybe TallCo® needs to introduce the 5th Blade Vibrating Razor.

[blog talldarkavg1]


your_gypsy 51F

9/16/2005 7:07 am

i like my men, as ms. doubtfire once said, short, furry and funny.


rm_CookieLips2 61M

9/16/2005 7:20 am

TDA, Why would you want to cultivate on your face what grows wild on your ass??


Theflinkychick 105F

9/16/2005 8:56 am

I love hairy men, back hair doesn't even turn me off. I don't understand the new preference for hairless chests. One of my favorite things is to gently pull all that hair... with my lips. Rub my face in it. I love beards, moustaches. Wonderful tickly stuff.

Btw, ZZ Top is all beards... the one who doesn't wear one is named Beard, that's just another of my stock of useless bits of trivia... LOL

Not all who wander are lost.


rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/16/2005 10:33 am

My luck Gypsy...I'm tall, shaven, and somber. I'll work on it.

[blog talldarkavg1]


rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/16/2005 10:35 am

Had similar thoughts Cookie. Also, due to my Native American heritage...my whiskers are more sparse than Cantinflas! Speaking of whom...is it just me or does he really really look like Jimminy Cricket?

[blog talldarkavg1]


rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/16/2005 10:38 am

Flinky...Hon...the pulling of hair may be why it isn't popular to have. Mind you, I love a good hair pull as much as the next guy during sex but...come to think of it...hair pulling isn't that bad after all. I'm with you on this one.

[blog talldarkavg1]


demonicsexkitten 41F
10671 posts
9/16/2005 2:27 pm

Pubic stubble? Odd. lol. I guess that should be either clean shaven, or left alone as God created it. But stubble once or twice might be OK. (I'll give you a definate answer if ever i experience it once!)


tamethytension 54M
2320 posts
9/16/2005 7:09 pm

In defense of beards ...

TDA how would I do what I do herein A little foreplay to get you going this morning ...

cheers

TTT


rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/21/2005 10:31 am

Kitten I shall await your findings.

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rm_talldarkavg1 105M
10172 posts
9/21/2005 10:32 am

T³ gottcha. Good point!

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